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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think school should name DS as winner?

39 replies

minxthemanx · 25/02/2009 21:18

DS1 age 7 has won a competition, which means he plus 40 odd children from his school have a day in London, tour round Houses of Parliament, meet a Lord etc - all expenses paid. Letter came home tonight with details of the visit - it said "someone" had won this competition, no name! Neither has he been mentioned on weekly newsletter well done section - I would think it's as much an achievement as the 5metre swimming badges etc! Don't feel I can say anything as will look like right pushy parent, but am disappointed for him. Wouldn't the parents want to know who had won? There wouldn't be a lovely trip if he hadn't! The Head did mention it in KS1 assembly, but it seems a bit mean to refer to him as "someone" in the letter. AIBU? Do you think there's a reason?

OP posts:
fryalot · 25/02/2009 21:21

I can't imagine why they wouldn't have named him unless there is some data protection issue with naming him on an official letter

Seems a bit off to me that he isn't named and celebrated properly.

Well done him btw! You must be very proud (if a bit pissed off with the school)

Original poster
minxthemanx · 25/02/2009 21:23

Yes, I did wonder if there was some data protection reason they didn't put his name, but can't see why it's ok to name everyone for their tap/ballet/football etc achievements. Doesn't help that I'm on the staff, so even more reason that I can't say anything.

OP posts:
etchasketch · 25/02/2009 21:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

myfunnynametaken · 25/02/2009 21:25

Well, I can see why you want some recognition but I think it all depends HOW your son won the competition.

For example, was it a "lottery" type competition where the answer was obvious and most people would answer it correctly and then the winner was picked at random. Or did it require some hard work and effort.

If it's the first, I don't mean to downgrade what he's done, but I can (almost) see why they didn't think it necessary to name him.

If it's the second however, then I think YANBU and his effort should be recognised. I wouldn't say anything though.

wolfear · 25/02/2009 21:25

I'd be annoyed. Kids loved being recognised for their achievements - so they should.

Original poster
minxthemanx · 25/02/2009 21:29

It was a local council competition called "It I ran the council..." DS wrote a long list of things he would put right. He put loads of thought into it.

OP posts:
pointydog · 25/02/2009 21:29

I would just ask whoever writes up the newsletter why your ds's name wasn't mentioned. Why not? Perfectly reasonable question. I'd feel proud too.

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 25/02/2009 21:29

I think it seems a bit rude and ungrateful of the school not to acknowledge him.

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 25/02/2009 21:29

Oh, and well done to your clever DS!

edam · 25/02/2009 21:30

Seems very unfair.

myfunnynametaken · 25/02/2009 21:30

If he put a lot of work into it then yeah, I do think they should have mentioned him. Miserable gits. (the school, not you and your son)

Lilyloo · 25/02/2009 21:31

I would also ask school why they havent mentioned him.
If they send home letters with pupils names in then no reason not to include ds

Original poster
minxthemanx · 25/02/2009 21:32

Maybe I could do something like scribble a note on the trip permission slip, asking whether it could be mentioned in the newsletter. Still seems bloody pushy, but it's pretty good kudos for the school and he did really well.

OP posts:
fryalot · 25/02/2009 21:34

I would deffo ask them if there is a reason why they haven't named him.

It sounds like the kind of extra-curricular thing that schools generally make a big fuss of and he should be rewarded for his hard work with loads of praise from everyone!

A boy at our local school won some kind of competition and was mentioned in the newsletter and all the mums were congratulating him as he came out of school the next day, it was lovely to see his proud little face. You son deserves the same.

cheesesarnie · 25/02/2009 21:34

its the taking part that counts well done your ds!

id make huge fuss of him at home but wouldnt bother with school-its done now.

pointydog · 25/02/2009 21:34

I wouldn't write a note. I'd phone or speak to someone nicely and quietly. Just say ds would love to see his name mentioned.

pointydog · 25/02/2009 21:35

it si not just the taking part that counts!

myfunnynametaken · 25/02/2009 21:36

I wouldn't ask them to include it. Then he would only be mentioned in the newsletter because his mother asked him to be. Not because the school thought his achievements worth of being mentioned. Things are always meaningless if you have to force people to do them .

On the other hand, they did mention his name in assembly, so he's had a bit of acknowledgment.

Hope they all enjoy the trip.

paolosgirl · 25/02/2009 21:38

Both DC's schools name children who win things (sadly none of my miscreants ever have ), and rightly so. It should be shouted from the rooftops IMO - and I would definitely have a quiet word with them about it. I'm sure that the school is quick enough to notify you of it's achievements or those of the teachers.

pointydog · 25/02/2009 21:42

goodness, I mgiht actually be cross if I thought the school didn't see his achievements as being worthy. I am assuming it was some silly oversight.

fryalot · 26/02/2009 13:02

what happened, minx?

Celia2 · 27/02/2009 08:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PuppyMonkey · 27/02/2009 08:41

Well put things right by contacting your local newspaper about him - they would probably be delighted to print his thoughts on how to run the local council!!! Seriously, they really really would!

LucyEllensmummy · 27/02/2009 09:31

I think that is really sad - your little lad not only won the school a fantastic prize, he will have raised the schools profile and set a great example to the other children. I think you should say something, but i wouldnt make it a big deal for your DS otherwise he might get upset, just make sure he knows how proud you are of him!! Well done minx's DS!

LilyBolero · 27/02/2009 09:33

Our school has an achievement board every week on the newsletter, so anyone who's achieved something can be congratulated - this might be winning a competition, or passing a swimming badge, or music exam, or doing well at writing or knowing times tables etc.