to wonder how women can have kids under five and still manage to look good?

[fufflebum]

I feel frumpy today. Anyone else?

Have a four year old and a nearly one year old.

AIBU to wonder how other women seem to manage to put on makeup and buy good fitting clothes???

I manage a shower and hairwash every morning but makeup and new clothes an impossibility.....!!!

Any tips?

LeQueen I don't think you are being honest about the TIME it takes to look groomed.

There are very BIG time consuming jobs involved.

a) Shopping online takes as long as shopping in a shop imo.

b) Repacking and returning goods.

c) keeping on top of eyebrows.

d) keeping on top of body hair.

e) going to the hairdresses.

d) ironing

e) excercising (espesh if involving an off-site facility)

f) getting nails done

Now If I had the HOURS required to achieve the above, then yes, I could find and prioritise the 15min a day maintainance!

However, given that I do not, I'd really rather not go out in a smart skirt, plunge top with scratched unpolished shoes, unshaven legs, bushy eyebrows and spotty chest. I much prefer to pick up my jeans an t-shirt from the landing where I left it the night before and put them on as heading downstairs, after a hurried wet-wipe wash in bed done at the last possible minute that I have to get up!

I have a 4 year old & work full-time but have always managed to look presentable. It's important to me to shower & wash my hair every day as I feel like crap if I don't. Even when ds had terrible colic as a baby & I didn't get any sleep for what felt like years I still managed to get myself showered & wearing decent clothes every morning. If you care how you look you find the time.

...can I just be a complete cow and say you can exercise around your home?

I do 10 mins on the stairs (I have 27 of them) I used to run up/down I now walk as are prgt. I use baked bean tins and a chair to bicep curls, chair to sit up sit down etc etc. I have a pt who worked this out for me so I can exercise with ds 2 -15 months in the house. You don't need a gym and you can do it at home.

All the rest I agree with

oh and used to 20 mins on the stairs before going out for a run or running and then doing 10/20 mins on the stairs. The stairs are knackering.....

Yes I agree its about priorities. Most of the time I dont prioritise grooming at all. But when I do- well then it becomes about two things, shoes, and money. Seriously, what stops me dressing better is always the thought of- but what shoes would look ok with that? If you start from the bottom up- ok , so Im wearing trainers today. Because, erm, I have them. And I can walk in them, even in the rain, or up hills. What would go with that? Oh yes, jeans again then. And with an apparently ever changing figure, a desparate belief that soon I will be thin enough to wear my endless wardrobe of nice prepregnancy jeans, and not enough money to spend on nice new jeans, or time to shop- it becomes same old again. But I dont really mind. What truly scuppers my fashion sense is having a social life made up of hanging out with a bunch of scruffy fellas in fishermans jumpers. Any cure for that, anyone?

ds always stands in the bathroom and chats and sings to me when I have a shower in the morning. I then sit and dry my hair and he plays with my spare hairbrush (he kept taking mine while I was trying to dry my hair, so I bought another one!)

We then go in to the living room and I sit on the floor and do my makeup and he plays with all the pots. Occasionally he'll chew my eyeliner, but I've learnt to keep him away from them now. He likes to play with the little pots, and he potters around a bit too. When I'm done I'll get dressed, but that takes minutes. When I'm not working it's definitely jeans and t's, but that's just because it's practical.

I do think a lot of it depends on the temperament of your child, my ds is pretty happy to entertain himself for 15 mins while I do my hair and make up, but I appreciate not all children are like that. I personally feel very odd leaving the house without makeup, the very least I'll be wearing is a bit of tinted moisturiser and mascara so perhaps it's just as well my ds can occupy himself for a bit while I do it!

If you work, you have to get up, get washed and get dressed in something half decent and presentable.

You also have more chance to go shopping without los kiddos in tow (impossible)if your office or whatever is in a town or city.

So, the solution is, work. If you don't already....

All those saying they don't have time to attend to personal grooming, ask yourself an honest question: how long per day do I spend on MN?

You may prefer MNing to waxing your legs, fine, but don't pretend you don't have time to spend on average 30 minutes per day on your appearance (and yes that includes online shopping, trying things on, packing them up - "come on DC, help mummy do sticking!" - and a walk with DC to post office to return them).

MN and chilcare are compatible.

I try and keep my looks up, but its hard, when you have no money to spend, as everything we have coming in, is going on paying the mortgage etc.

Zactly Starlight, ds is asleep on my lap now

And your children may well not have suffered any kind of neglect Lequeen, as dd didn't either, she was happy to be left playing or sat watching me in the bathroom but ds as a young baby was a different story, as Headfairy said, it depends on the temerament of the child as to how easy it is to get things done.

hmm, can I really shave my armpits and bf?

You could probably manage the lower half of your legs with a dry razor

I'll feel more refreshed after the weekend, DP has treated me/us to a spa break weekend for our anniversary and i have a massage and facial to look forward too

Be honest, if you can take your attention away from DC to MN you can take your attention away for long enough to shave your legs.

I BF for 22 months. It wasn't a 24-7 thing for me.

These are excuses. You don't have to make any. Just don't kid yourself that it isn't possible to be groomed and have toddlers because it is (excepting SN/illness/disability, and even then I'm sure plenty manage).

I always make sure i'm groomed etc - my sister is a beauty therapist so i have a waxer on tap iykwim - my hair can go abit all over the place, but i just do the best i can - in regards to exercise due to limited mobility, can't do to much, running around after DD is all i do!

You can epilate and breastfeed simultaneously easy peasy [voice of experience]. Face masks and eyelash dye OK for some babies (inc my DD), scary for others (my niece) - you have to use trial and error...

BF plus sleeping IS a 24/7 thing when they are 4 months though.

I don't think I look groomed even when I am TBH, I have an ungroomed look about me. Unlike my friend who looks good even just out of her bed in her pj's

I did a facemask with ds in the sling once Anna (I think it may have been on your advice actually, well, not directly to me but off the back of a thread like this), he had one of his screaming fits and ended up with it all over him. Is quite funny to look back on now but at the time I was convinced it was going to poison him

I don't know why this is upsetting you. Fine if this is not a priority or even a possibility for you. In my experience (and DS was a very demanding young baby and still is a demanding toddler) after about the first 6 weeks I felt able to get back into normal routine with clothes/cooking/personal care.

If it isn't working out like that for you, no one is criticising.

clairebrations. Glad your DS survived.

My DD used to get very upset when my mother put a bath hat on, but used to giggle very sweetly at me in a face mask