Not to let my ex see the children this Christmas

[gemmydingdongbell]

Ex hasn't been interested in or seen the children for months. He's missed birthdays, most access visits (arranged informally) doesn't phone or return calls.
However, a few days ago he has been calling frantically wanting to come for a day over Christmas (more so the day itself) to see the children saying that he has changed.
I've refused as I don't believe him and don't want him to ruin things. yet I still feel strangely guilty.
So aibu?

OP, it sounds to me as if you were generous and reasonable. Happy New Year to you.

LOL at not wanting to larf at something serious. I presume you don't enjoy Blackadder then.

"Because each child has the right to maintain a relationship with each parent"

Oh for goodness sake, how many times are you going to repeat that mantra of rights to maintain a relationship with both parents, when one of those parents is not interested in maintaining that relationship? It is the father in this case who has impeded his children's rights to maintain a relationship with him - have you not read what the OP has said about this?

I totally agree with NKF, this talk about rights is completely pointless. This man is not interested in his chidlren's rights to maintain a relationship with him and the theoretical right is unenforceable, so therefore academic. A right is only a right if it can be enforced. My legal and moral right not to be tortured if I'm arrested, can be enforced by the law. A child's right to have a relationship with a parent who doesn't want to have a relationship with him/ her, cannot realistically be enforced by the state. (Although apparantly there are proposals to penalise parents who don't turn up for their contact visits, and about time too.)