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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to take the mick out of male colleagues who bring in shared food that their WIVES have made

719 replies

morningpaper · 14/12/2008 22:34

this makes me both scornful and slightly depressed and I resort to extreme sarcasm

Only last week I was nibbling lemon cake from a colleagues WIFE.

What IS that ABOUT?

AIBU?

OP posts:
BucksFizz · 15/12/2008 12:10

Message deleted

Gateau · 15/12/2008 12:12

Really Anna?
How strange!

BucksFizz · 15/12/2008 12:13

Message deleted

Libraloveschristmas1975 · 15/12/2008 12:13

I don't think the OP started a bitchfest anymore than anyone who posts in AIBU does.

I also don't think sending in cakes to the office actually constitutes looking after colleagues I'm pretty sure they would die of scurvy pretty soon if that was the case.

Also Anna8888 what does your DP do that demands such a professional persona that home-made cakes would be frowned apon? Genuinely interested!

Libraloveschristmas1975 · 15/12/2008 12:15

Bucksfizz I wasn't entreating people to be more bitchy I was commenting that I didn't think that this thread had been particularly bitchy compared with what this site is truly capable of.

BucksFizz · 15/12/2008 12:15

Message deleted

Anna8888 · 15/12/2008 12:15

No not strange. Domestic affairs have no place at all in the office environment.

However, sometimes DP's marketing director sends products home for me to try and give my professional opinion (she knows I am very difficult when it comes to cosmetics ).

ComeOVeneer · 15/12/2008 12:16

Anna. I am not looking after dh's colleagues I am sending them in a treat. oh an in response to

"It would demean my DP's professional persona were I to send in home made cakes - he would look ridiculous"

My husband is an extremely sucessful insolvency lawyer and me sending in cakes occasionally to work has been met with nothing but thanks it hasn't harmed him professionally in the slightest. In fact I had an email last week from his boss saying they were missing getting my cakes as I have been so busy with paid orders, home, chairing the pta to have time to do them for a while.

Gateau · 15/12/2008 12:16

Maybe not, libra, but that's not my point.
What I mean is, I can't believe someone sending cakes into the office gets the OP so wound up that she has to feel scornful about itand be bitchy about it.

Libraloveschristmas1975 · 15/12/2008 12:17

Bucksfizz are you actually reading my posts?

GoodWilfToAllMN · 15/12/2008 12:18

rofl at the Tortes of Tyranny and the Pastry of Patriarchy.

Anna8888 · 15/12/2008 12:18

Well maybe it's a cultural thing. I do not (and indeed must not) "treat" my DP's colleagues or employees. That would be a major infringement of professional boundaries.

ComeOVeneer · 15/12/2008 12:20

Well I think that is rather sad Anna, that a few homemade cakes would be such a faux pas.

Gateau · 15/12/2008 12:20

"Domestic affairs have no place at all in the office environment."
How stuffy does that make you sound, Anna?That's headmistress-speak.
Since when was sending in cakes a "domestic affair" anyway?

BucksFizz · 15/12/2008 12:21

Message deleted

WeWishEWEaMerryXmas · 15/12/2008 12:21

This thread has also inspired me to bake this evening when I get home from work! Surely not the point but it has put the idea into my head!

If there are any left I may suggest DP take some to work and I probably will too.

I think YABVU btw. Would you feel it was better if the men had baked the cakes themselves?

ComeOVeneer · 15/12/2008 12:22

TBH I think the more sucessful workplaces are those that recognise their staff are human beings witha life and family outside of the 4 walls, and wouldn't ridicule such a practice, imo makes for happier workers.

Libraloveschristmas1975 · 15/12/2008 12:22

Well if you are not allowed to that's a different matter. However in the UK I am nor sure of any profession which wouldn't allow someone to bring in cakes from the non-gender-specific partner.

GoodWilfToAllMN · 15/12/2008 12:23

Who takes cakes to work anyway? I hate all my colleagues.

Anna8888 · 15/12/2008 12:24

Well I am exceedingly grateful that homemade cakes are not part of the boss's partner/wife's remit .

Libraloveschristmas1975 · 15/12/2008 12:26

This is what people are trying to explain, it's not a remit, it's not a duty or a chore, it's not a have to do. It's something that they like doing. You may not understand that, it may baffle you but then women who can walk in 3 inch heels baffle me but there is nothing wrong with it it's just not my cup of tea so to speak.

Anna8888 · 15/12/2008 12:29

No, I know it's not a duty. But, like I say, in the culture I live in it would make my DP look very silly indeed if his DP/DW sent in cakes to his colleagues - as in, she has nothing better to do with her time than bake.

ComeOVeneer · 15/12/2008 12:29

Ah libra I bake in 3 inch heels

Gateau · 15/12/2008 12:30

I agree Libra (though I like my heels!).
I would hate to be so up my own backside that I felt demeaned by making a few cakes for my Dh's colleagues at Christmas.
I really thought women had moved on.

ComeOVeneer · 15/12/2008 12:30

"as in, she has nothing better to do with her time than bake." What a load of twaddle. It takes no time at all to bake. And how pray should we be spending our time Anaa, please enlighten me?

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