To feel a surge of rage when MIL refers to DS as 'her' baby.

[headscrewedonmum]

It really winds me up, I want to slap her when she says it.

I just saw this message and have total sympathy, I have been made to feel I gave birth to the messiah the way my DS is treated by my MIL. MIL has never made any secret about the fact that she prefers boys to girls, her own DD has 3 DD's and the only boy grandchild is with me and DH - but she has no control over me, but still trys to with her own interjection of what she would do/ and in her day etc etc it was this that and the other. It is so hard to keep a lid on it, I just simmer most of the time. I have loads more MIL stuff to say, but sometimes wonder that those netters who have brill relationships with their inlaws - easliy pass judgement without being in our shoes!!!

PS,,,CAT me if you want anyone to talk to ! x

My mum will say 'where's my baby girl' in a mad voice when she sees dd, but I don't think anything of it. It's not like she means dd's her baby, but just that dd is the only baby (first grandchild for my parents) in our family. I'm the first of 3 sisters to have had a child, so everyone makes a big fuss over dd. Don't think of it in a negative way.

However, if it was my exp's mother, I think I would feel differently, just because it's a totally different relationship. It would make me feel weird.

I can see both sides of this argument. If you MIL is controlling and not nice to you then the phrase 'my baby' can be taken as a backhanded comment towards you, but if your MIL is generally nice and you get on well then I can see that it will most likely be a term of endearment.

My MIL has said this, MIL and I tollerate each other, she is very backhanded and undermining with me. OTH my mum has also said this. I have told both of them in no uncertain terms that I don't like it. I don't think this makes me an insecure mother, it's just I did all of the hard work, carrying DD, 59 hours of labour 99% of the childcare for the first 6 months as DH was working all hours.

DD is mine and DH's baby not my mums or MIL's, DD is their Grand daughter.

They both now call her by little nick names that they have come up with. I am very happy about this. My mum calls her 'Rumba Bumba' don't ask me why as I have no idea but DD seems to like it.

MIL calls DD daddys little girl (see another backhander at me)