To think that people seem to think that a birth is only traumatic if it ends in an emergency c-section??

[anyoneelsedonethis]

I have massive sympathy for women who end up with em c-s after attempting natural birth.

Am I wrong in thinking though that unless you end up with an emcs people just dismiss your birth as non-difficult/traumatic???

Some people end up with horrible ventouse/forceps/tearing experiences but no-one really seems to give much sympathy for these. That is wrong I think.

This is my dissertation topic (PTSD following childbirth)

This thread is very interesting

Everyone knows that stuff OP.
I only wanted to know why you were asking, and you still haven't told me, but that's fine, I'll let you get on with it.

Thanks flight, it's big of you to allow me to use an open forum you have no jurastiction over

Can I just say that I have actually experienced the opposite, when I had my DS 2.5years ago I was all geared up for a nice, calm water birth, but whilst I was being monitered no I didn't even make it to the delivery suite they noticed that his heart rate kept dramatically dropping when I was getting contractions even though I was only 4cm dillated, so had to have an ECS.

From the MW point of view yes I do think that they do tend to priorotise those of us who have ECS but on the whole public perception seems to be that in some way you failed. I have come across this a few times even my own mother and my best friends DP told me 'they knew I would end up taking the easy way out because I am crap with pain' and I was also told once when I said birth experience at mother and toddlers how did I know because I have never given birth because of comments like this I felt as though I'd let my DS down but now realise that they did what was best fr him and I had no control over it.

In a way maybe CS does seem to be 'the easy way' or whatever some people want to call it and I do agree that a vaginal birth can be as traumatic or sometimes more, but at the end of the day we all ahve different threshols some find it a walk in the park some find it the most awful experience ever no one can tell us what we should feel/think of as traumatic or painful either way we have given life to a child and as far as Im concerned thats an amazing thing no matter how they came into the world.

Sorry for hijacing and I realise its a bit off subject but just felt Id add my bit.

Oops have I killed the thread?

OP you're welcome

think you've been here longer than me anyway but I was concerned in case you hadn't. None of us has to write anything on here anyway but you could have just said why you were asking. I didn't want to fall out with someone genuine.

Oblamov what a shame...

If you have a general I think (in my V.limited knowledge but I'm swotting up in preparation), that the general is used either when the epi/spinal doesn't work, or if there's no time to do it, and the latter is a crash section.

Labouring for hours and then having an EC seems to mean that as well as being more swollen and the procedure happening more hastily and stitching not as easy (as mentioned - making scar worse), than you can be so much more run-down than with the Elective, hence one of the reasions for increased infection risk.

I am apparently more prone to infection, and scarring, but am hoping that I get my elective with no surprises! If I end up starting labour and therefore have an "emergency" then I've been given the re-assurance that at least your stomach isn't "next to your bottom"! Downstairs infections in your stitches are bloody evil and have put the fear in me

Thanks lotster

I had a crash section (general) with dc3. To be honest by the time I got to the section bit though I was put under sobbing with fear it was actually the least traumatic bit about the whole episode.
I've never had anything but sympathy but I dont know if thats because people dont automatically assume I was too posh to push or the like as dd was prem.

The big bad crash sections are occasionally called 'slash and grab' by staff if they need to be cheered to avoid fainting due the stress of working in those circumstances.

Don't tell anyone told you.

In as much as it's hardly a professional term is it.

You have a great attitude MarxAndSparks. The end result is the thing - although it's not always that easy to see or really feel like that I do know.

You may have a point - as my epidural went in and the syntocinon to speed it all up started and I kissed goodbye to my water birth I did actually think - ah well I wasn't born entitled to the birth I want. In fact, I wasn't born to necessarily even survive birthing. Many haven't historically adn wouldn't today if not for the much hated intervention. Certainly many many babies would be lost - that was just a given not long ago, up till 1950's or 60's say.

It's dissapointing to have plans and dreams sat on though - of course it is. I was able
to not take it personally but only 'cos I'm in the trade and have seen it all before.

Marx - what do you mean about it going too far? Are you saying there are too many home births or too much intervention in hospitals?

I think if I'm right, (and if I'm not here's my two cents anyway!) Marx might be saying that intervention isn't always a terrible thing, and home births simply aren't possible for everyone?

We are led to believe that because we'e in our own homes, we'll of course be super relaxed, and we won't have those problems that lead to intervenion and going to hospital. And that if we just have the midwives available to do it in our area, then it's the way forward. This simply isn't true for many. I believed this at first, despite friends and family begging me to re-consider as it was my first birth and my ability to labour hadn't been "proved" yet.

Turns out they were right, I'm one of those people who'se babies (and myself) Tree says wouldn't have made it. I was fully dilated, with a posterior baby, with a big head, and absolutely no natural urge to push. I got so exhausted with contractions and "couldn't push him out in a month of "Sundays" apparently. It took 4 failed ventouse attempts, a hand up me to turn him a bit (felt like a cow at this point) and finally forceps to get him out. So despite my quick and calm drug free dilation, I had no control. Lucky I was at hospital, lucky he had a strong heartbeat.

How I wish I could have pushed him out in to the water, but as they say, man makes plans, God laughs.

spelling and punctuation shite, apologies.

But your common sense is boundless

Aint hindsight wonderful?!

ok, I mainly ask as I planned a home water birth for DD, pool set up etc but labour was too long and I had to go to hospital. Now preg with number 2 and making plans. I am hoping to go to the local birthing centre as a half way house!

Why not go for it again? Unless you needed massive intervention for some pretty specific reasons, generally speaking your LESS likely to need the intervention again and so this might be your water birth!

Less likely to be 'too' slow second time so if that's all that went against the plans then your hcp's should be fairly encouraging???

Sorry what is hcps?

I don't think I can be bothered to plan the homebirth again to be honest. I found it a lot of faff to be honest considering it didn't work. Spent weeks getting the pool all set up, had waterproof mats all over the floor, and up the first part of the wall, Towels and mats everywhere. MW wanted a section set up for emergency treatment of the baby etc and then when I came out of hospital, had to spend hours packing it all up again.

Also, if I want to go to the birth centre, you need to do it in advance, so if I were to plan the homebirth, I couldn't then go to the birthing centre. And the birthing centre have less "rules" about when you need to move to a labour ward.

Basically last time my waters broke but I was only 2cm. 24hours later I was still only 2 cm (although contractions every 3-4min) so I had to go in to be monitored for infection. After about 40 hours I was then induced to speed things up and THEN I started dilating!

hcp - health care professionals

I can totally see your point. Great you have the birthing centre choice too.