dd was found in the street by a passer by this morning

[totalmisfit]

She had escaped from nursery. I am actually feeling a panic attack coming on as i write this so i'll try to convey what I have been told happened.

At around 11.30 she was sitting on the knee of a staff member. At that point it was time for the older 'nursery proper' (as opposed to the daycare section which she is a part of, as she's only 2.6) children to go home. Mothers arrived and somehow in the hubbub dd managed to get passed the nursery nurse who was on the door,down the steps, out of a disabled access (push button) door, through the car-park, out of the gate and into the street.

At around 11.40 she was found by two passers by (a man and a woman) who asked another passer by if she was her child. She said no, so the woman in the couple took dd into a local shop to see if she had escaped from there. When she was told 'no' she took her back to the car and phoned the police. After doing this she took her to the nursery.

I arrived at 11.50 (due to pick her up at 12 but arrived early). The woman who found her was talking very angrily to the nursery staff as i walked in, but at this stage i didn't know who she was or what had happened. One of the members of staff said 'X is over there' pointing to the wendy house. I looked inside and saw dd's hair was wet. I commented on this and it was only then that the nursery manager told me what had happened.

We were then joined by the woman who had found dd who told me how she had found her and what she had done. She advised the police were on their way. Nursery manager very apologetic, made me a cup of tea. I just felt utterly numb, I couldn't really react. I still can't believe this has happened.

The police arrived at about 12.10 and nursery manager and I went into a separate room to talk to them. They took some details from me, our names and addresses and asked nursery manager what had happened. They said they were just glad she had been found and didn't consider it a criminal investigation and that it was now up to the nursery to conduct their own internal investigation. I said 'well do you have the name of the people who found her' because the woman i had met had left by this point. and they were a bit taken aback by this and said 'well no. do you have it?' to the manager. She said no. They then radioed to get the name and address although they said they couldn't give it to me.

I said i didn't want it anyway, i just wanted to make sure they had it for their records.

I'm sorry if this doesn't make a lot of sense, i'm having trouble keeping it together right now. I still can't believe this happened and needed to share it. Hopefully lessons can be learned from this.

Part of me is just so thankful nothing worse happened and that she's safe at home. But then another part of me thinks 'what the fuck? why are you thankful? this should never have happened in the first place'

Thank god your DD is ok. Poor you, what a shock to arrive to that.

I agree Ofsted should be informed.

I think you should write to/call OFSTED as well as the nursery doing it. Who knows what gloss the nursery will put on it?

I think the worst thing of all is that they didn't realise she had gone. That is wrong on so many levels and almost criminally negligent.

I would be surprised if Ofsted don't contact you, would think they would do so.

I agree. Report them.
At the risk of sounding OTT I'd be tempted to sue them, not just to punish them for yourself, but so someone else in the future never has to deal with this, or worse.
Perhaps just the threat of action would be enough to give them and the way they do things a serious shake up.

My nursery had a pin access on all doors, sounds like they need this.

To trust your precious child to someone is so hard, I wouldn't know what to do re: her returning. If she does return they'll watch her like a hawk I'm sure from now on because of it all.

You poor thing. I am so pleased for you that your little Houdini is safe.

The nursery should contact Ofsted anyway.

If you put a complaint in writing then the nursery must have it available shold anyone else ask to see it, and they must follow it up with you.

How scarey though.
Glad she was okay.

What a horrible, spinechilling story. Glad all is well with lo. You need to have several stiff drinks and a good cry about this too.

Similar situation happened at our local state nursery (despite parental complaints about their policies previously) and they now have a prison-like system for signing kids in and out. I know the trust is broken but the new policies that the nursery will have to implement may prevent similar from happening again and make DD safer in the future?

Get the wine chilling

OMG! Glad to hear she is safe and well. I say this there are more nice people than the nasty TG. Sadly, what makes me really, really, angry are parents at my nursery chatting to other parents not paying attention to other peoples children while they hold the gate and doors open. I pick up and drop off my boy at various times so I'm sometimes shocked to see a parent leaving the gate as I get closer see they have left the gate and door open. I don't need it left open for me I'm an adult!! I can't blame nursery staff for this. I always tell them. Police will make a full report but is not a criminal matter but civil. Oh! I would be sending a thank you letter to the lovely couple.

I drive past DS's nursery quite regularly, I always have a dread that I will see him at the end of the drive, can't imagine how I'd feel if it actually happened!

thats awful, every mothers worse nightmare

i am so glad she is ok.

Can't begin to imagine how you feel, that is truly appalling.

I know, you've probably signed off now, but maybe it would be a good idea for you to spend a significant amount of time in the nursery, 'helping' - long enough for the staff to begin to forget that you are watching them - so you can get a feel of whats really going on there. I realise this could be tricky with work commitments etc, but IMO well worth it. If nursery aren't keen then probably not a good sign.

I've heard of a similar mistake happening in 2 nurseries, neither time quite as bad.

One time, child was noticed missing well within 1 minute and pulled from in front of a nearly moving vehicle. Staff were in shock for weeks, genuine mistake by genuinely loving, diligent staff, IMO could just as easily happen with a childminder. the child is still there. I DO trust these staff with my own children.

Other time 2 children were left outside in secure play area for nearly 20 mins before member of staff from another room noticed they were missing. Wouldn't trust these staff with my dog - if I had one.

I think you need to find out which is the situation at your nursery, before making any decision about changing your child's carers.

BTW, I'm a nursery nurse, we make mistakes sometimes- we're human, but if I was responsible for a mistake like that I would be seriously considering a career change!

unbelievable!
glad your dd is safe

I would infrom ofsted

I'm so glad your dd was found safe and well and very that this happened at all. Disgraceful, negligent conduct by the nurserY.

I absolutely agree about contacting Ofsted that is essential.

How awful for you! My DS1 is in nursery and it always worries me if he were to escape somehow without the staff knowing. Thankfully nothing happend to your DD, but it could have and you would have been none the wiser, due to their negligence. Report the nursery to your local care standards inspectorate. Legally, the nursery will have to report it to them themselves, but I am wondering whether they will try to keep this quiet, so you should report it to them too. Then they will have an inspection to make sure that their security is up to standard. Do you think she actually did get into a car? You should put that in writing too - maybe she didn't (and lets hope not) but i would certainly write that in your complaint.

TBH, if it were me, I wouldn't send my child back there, but that's easy for me to say because I run my business from home and I don't have to arrange any childcare.

I would write a letter of thankyou to the couple who found her and ask the police to pass it on for you. I saw something on telly this morning done by Esther Rantzen about children in a shopping centre who were pretending to be lost and the amount of adults who just walked by was unbelievable! Thankfully for you, your baby wasn't just dismissed and passed by.

You've had a big shock, but she is safe thank God. Take it easy tonight.

Message withdrawn

Let ofsted know!

A similar thing happened with DS1(3.10) last week.

I dropped him at nursery at 8:50am. Stood outside talking to a friend until 9am.

When I picked him up I was told 'DS1 went out the door today, I've explained why eh can't do it but can you reinforce it to him' (the children are allowed free-play into a gated garden. Garden gates were open at this point still though).

I then see my friend who tells me that she found DS2 about ten minutes after I left her. All-in-all around 20 minutes after he had been dropped at nursery.

She had found him outside the internal gates so had taken him in to nursery.

I have since spoken to the teacher, the head of the foundation stage and the head teacher, plus mentioned it to two friends who are governors.

They put a new system into place immediately.

Now there is a sign on the internal gate saying that they must be kept closed at all times. They have added an elastic kind of loop over the top of it so it is not possible for the nursery children to open and the teaching assistant stays outside the nursery doors, in the garden until all children are in school and all gates locked, after then anyone arriving at school must use the main gate and have to be buzzed in (this was always the way but now the gates are locked sooner and policed better).

I know just how scary this is, I felt physically sick, and I cried when angrily discussing my precious little boy being 'lost' by people who were meant to be caring for him.

But I wouldn't be so quick as to remove Dd from the nursery. See what they put in place to make sure it never happens again first. After all, they are going to have to do something and if she is unharmed it might be too much to uproot her.

Name and shame - thats what I think you should do, they deserve it. It should NEVER happen. Thank god your DD is ok. Ofsted should be made aware and in my opinion they should be closed down and investigated into how this could possibly happen. Absolutely flabbergasted at this.

Closed down?
As long as they take decent precautions now and act on it they don't need to be closed down.

I could understand closing them down if it happened daily, but a one off incident?

If changes are made, and quickly what more can be done?

My sone got out my house and down the street across a main road to the shops when he was 2.5 I'm guessing by your reasoning i should have had him and my other children taken off me

That would be son

How horrible for you. I'm glad you've reported it to OFSTED and hope they tighten up their security procedures. One of the reasons I took my DS out of nursery and moved him to a CM is that the door to the street was left open at least once a month by a departing carer who hadn't closed it properly. I mentioned it to the nursery a few times but it still happened.

I do think this is an issue with nurseries - I doubt my CM would fail to notice my DS isn't there - she only has a few kids to look after so I think you do notice when they've gone.

You need to report this to your local council Early years department and or Ofsted. It would be enough to prompt a unannounced check, they certainly shoud be.

How awful for you.

I'm really surprised that the police didn't press charges, but I'm not sure what teh charges would be.. neglect?

Definitely Ofsted. Also council.