to expect DH to not go off by himself for 1 day of a 5 day holiday

[wearehipsandmakers]

Off to the Lakes tomorrow to stay with my parents- nice relaxing break, first one in OMG over a year!!! Pre kids days DH would always have a day walking up Coniston Old Man or something ( and even when we had one kid he did) but we have a 5 month old as well as a seriously manic 3 year old and have just had a very stressful couple of months so when the issue came up I said I would prefer it if he didn't go this holiday (only this 1). He said 'hmmmm' and nothing more was said about it. Then today while tidying up come across a list off stuff he wants to remember to take- phone charger, laptop.... walking boots, waterproof trousers, maps...
So I guess he's still planning on going. Is it unreasonable to think he might be able to forgo it just this once?

Ok, just rad the thread and I was thinking "let the man go" but I appreciate the point about if have a day then he has a day that's half your holiday gone.

And now I read he won't look after both of them. Um, what if you decided you couldn't look after both of them either. FFS that sort of attitude makes me so cross and I just would not stand it from DH (not that I would ever get that from him). Parenting is a partnership and if he hasn't got the BALLS to look after his children he shouldn't have had them.

Sorry weare, that doesn't help, but you need to sort this out or how are YOU ever to get a break.

Message withdrawn

Bollocks to not looking after two kids on his own.

My DP will be taking our 5 month old, 3 yr old and 7yr old out all day tomorrow by himself, because he is their Dad (in fact he is the eldest two's stepdad) and I need a break.

I wouldn't give him the choice tbh, but then I wouldn't veto a day out walking for him either.

When did you become his mother and stop being his equal?

Jura, do you know what? He's going with a friend who works in Surrey (just looked at your profile).

And, wearehipsandmakers, bollox to not looking after them both. A holiday is an ideal place for him to get some practice at that.

YABU - let him have a day to himself.

Or why don't you all go? You can carry the smaller kids and a a three year old could make it half way up Coniston Old Man himself at least.

DH got the heebie jeebies about looking after both of the DDs together on his own a while back. While DD2 was still tiny though.

He got over it, mainly by doing it.

Hell, I panicked about looking after both of them together before DD2 was born. It does seem like a really big deal until you're used to it.

So I do understand the sentiment.

However I don't think I'd be happy to have DH "stating" anything that was then accepted without debate as law. Thats not marriage thats a dictatorship. These things should get discussed and worked out.