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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that a size 16 is not fat

284 replies

roseability · 19/08/2008 21:48

I mean I would say this, as I am surprisingly enough a size 16.

When I was younger I dieted, starved and fought myself into a size 10-12. I just can't be bothered anymore. My DH seems to like my curves and I feel it is only society that deems I should be thinner.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with a size 10-12 BTW but I think some women are naturally smaller sizes than others

I want to stand up to all this size 0 shit! Why can't we just be the size we are without feeling inadequate.

What do you all think?
How do you feel about your size?
What is your opinion of other's size?

Am I harking on about nothing or should Mnetters stand up and embrace their curves/lumps/bumps

OP posts:
SalBySea · 19/08/2008 22:50

I buy vintage clothes a lot and am the same size that I am in most new clothes

although some places like ASDA, New Look & Primark are VERY generous - there's no way I'm a size 10 but I am in their stuff

as for H&M - well thats just a lucky dip, I can be anything from an 8 to a 16 in there!

kama · 19/08/2008 22:51

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heartmummy · 19/08/2008 22:52

i love u rose!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im a size 16-18 before my dd was born and i worked 40-50 hours a week i was a size 8-10 but if im honest i have more confidance now im larger! i do have my fat days but i did when i was smaller

Lauriefairycake · 19/08/2008 22:53

I don't think a size 20 is a 'very large size'

because that's the same as saying a size 12 is a very small size

They are both equidistant from the average

what bothers me is when shops stop at a size 16 - I really don't understand why they do this (I can think of a few reasons but it certainly doesn't seem to make financial sense). I got the Cath Kidston catalogue today and they stop at a 16 and I'm pretty sure I'm their target market (18)

threekids · 19/08/2008 22:54

I was a size 22, and weighed in at 18+ stone. I was fat!

I worked hard, go to the gym most days and now weigh just over 12 stone, this has taken me nearly 4 year, but still wear a size 16 in some things. Can range between a size 12 to 16 (depending on the cut) only because i have rather large thighs due to the exercise. My BMI is normal. I am not sure that being a size 16 really means that someone is "fat".

But it it really depends how people actually feel about themselves. I did get down to 11 stone at xmas time and my hips stuck out, my ribs showed and i didnt look particularly feminine.

suey2 · 19/08/2008 22:56

I am a 16 at present but still in the ideal BMI range. I am still bf my 8 month old daughter so not really fussed although I have started to exercise and eat more healthily. Otherwise I have always been size 14, even when sick and 9 stone, because of my height and build.
I get really fed up of being made to feel fat even when I am my normal size. Shopping for clothes has always been depressing.
In answer to the op, yabu if you are 5 foot, but not if you are 6

Mamazon · 19/08/2008 22:57

im a size 24 and weigh probably near 21st.

im fat. but im not unhealthy...im probablynot as fit as i culd be but im not unhealthy

NorkyButNice · 19/08/2008 22:59

Over the last 8 years or so I went from a size 24 down to a 12 and am now around a 16. I'm probably 2 stone or so over a healthy BMI, and I definitely don't feel as attractive (even though DH swears he thinks I'm great however I look - he never saw me at a size 24 so I don't know whether that's true).

I'm 5'10 so I can carry off the extra weight better than someone shorter - also I'm fairly in proportion with a larger chest and hips and a small waist. People are generally suprised when they find out how much I weigh (not that I go around talking about it!).

I would say most size 16 women are going to be overweight.

Treeny · 19/08/2008 23:00

I like the idea in principle that size/weight don't matter and it's all a question of how happy you are in your own skin. I told myself this as I expanded from size 10 to 16 over a decade or so. But when size 16 got a bit tight and shopping trips became more and more restricted (and the spectre of Evans loomed), I decided enough was enough.

A couple of months after DD2 was born I took myself in hand and am now size 10/12 - I've lost two stone and I feel so much better for it. I can't be doing with calorie-counting and low-fat - would feel way too deprived - instead I've cut down drastically on my consumption of carbs and sugar, consciously eat smaller portions, much less snacking between meals and lots of marching around briskly with the buggy. It was so much easier than I would have expected, and the weight has stayed off, nearly a year after I started. I love having a proper choice of clothes again, and - shallow cow that I am - I've loved all the compliments that have come my way!

I spent years telling myself that fat was OK - but it's so much more comfortable to weigh less. I have more energy, feel better about myself and enjoy getting dressed each day. Definitely worth sacrificing a few roast potatoes for!

KerryMum · 19/08/2008 23:01

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solidgoldbrass · 19/08/2008 23:06

ALL diets will fuck you up. The slimming industry is the biggest con since religion, they don't actually want you to be healthy, they want you to lose wieght, gain weight, hate yourself and buy more of their crap. Slimming diets mess up your metabolism so you then gain more weight when you stop eating chalk milkshakes and chunks of cardboard.
If you are physically comfortable and can get up a flight of stairs or run for a bus, you're healthy, the rest is just mundane conformist bullshit.
I am around a 16/18 but have no idea what I weigh and don't care, either. Some of my clothes (which fit) are size 12/14 as well.

lulurose · 19/08/2008 23:09

I agree with Treeny completely, although I'm short (5"3) so can't carry extra weight easily, if I go over 10 stone I feel really sluggish and tired.

We have Diabetes in the family too so I'm quite conscious of keeping within ideal BMI.

QuintessentialShadows · 19/08/2008 23:11

hey, solidgoldbrass, how are you? Saw a rather un-chirpy post from you on a thread earlier?
[concerned emoticon]

ThatBigGermanPrison · 19/08/2008 23:13

Size 0 is a uk size 4, which is what a UK size 8 used to be. It's slim - it's NOT bony. I am a size 16 and have a bmi of 29 which is FAR from ideal.

ThatBigGermanPrison · 19/08/2008 23:14

I was a size 16 when I was 18 and I was 1.5 stone lighter than I am now - yet my size 16 shorts are dropping off my arse and I need a belt for them.

StormInanEcup · 19/08/2008 23:14

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Treeny · 19/08/2008 23:16

I'm short too - only 5'1. At my heaviest - unpregnant, that is - I was just over 11 stone. Not a good look, and really uncomfortable. I've always thought fat was a feminist issue, but have decided that women can be oppressed more by their eating habits than by what other people say.

JamieJay · 19/08/2008 23:18

I am 2 stone overweight (am doing WW at the moment) but even when I was a healthy BMI I was still a size 14 - only one size smaller than a 16.

However I am 5'9 and very broad across the shoulders and hips so I think that frame does have something to do with it.

Women are supposed to have curves and I strongly feel we should embrace healthy curves - be they size 10, 12 or 16 - rather than focus on becoming a size 0 and all that crap.

Being too skinny is just as unhealthy in my mind as being overweight.

Treeny · 19/08/2008 23:18

The thigh-chafing - yes! If anything made me want to become less wobbly, it was that. Now I've ditched the black trousers and wear skirts all the time - hurrah.

QueenofAllWildThings · 19/08/2008 23:19

I'm only 5ft so if I was a 16 I would look fat - I look fat now at a size 12 as there is nowhere for extra curves/fat to go other than OUT! If you're quite tall and built broader then a size 16 is fine - it's all about proportion and a healthy BMI, IMHO!

Quattrocento · 19/08/2008 23:20

A size 16 (a modern size 16, because sizes have expanded) is undoubtedly fat. Sorry about that.

Check your BMI. If that tells you are overweight, lose it. It's not good for you.

I speak as one who struggles with weight issues. I was a size 16. I'm not now, but it was hard work because I love food. And drink.

twinsetandpearls · 19/08/2008 23:20

I am a 16 and fat. I also lack energy so am going something about it. I suit a size 12 although dp does not like it when I loose weight hence I tend to put it back on.

CountessDracula · 19/08/2008 23:21

I am size 14 and 5 foot 5
I feel fat some days and fine others

However I work with people who are bigger sizes and don't look fat to me but when i sit next to them i can see that they are fatter.

It's all to do with confidence though isn't it. And self-esteem.

My totally ideal size is a 12
I look ill if I am smaller as I have a v big frame (36" back and big shoulders/wrists etc)

JamieJay · 19/08/2008 23:21

Sorry just read some more posts.

BMI needs to be taken with a pinch of salt in some situations. Whilst it takes height into consideration it doesn't differenciate [sp!] between fat and muscle so it can be quite easy for someone sporty to be classed as overweight.

However, generally this isn't an issue for the average person as you do need to be carrying a fair amount of muscle

threekids · 19/08/2008 23:30

But its not the dress size, its how the person feels inside. Being a size 16 does not automatically put you into the "fat" sector of society.

We all know that dress sizes vary from shop to shop that should not be our benchmark for personal perfection