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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

do i REALLY have to explain why me and dh rent our house?

217 replies

spudFace · 31/07/2008 19:06

we have been together for 20 years and have never had loads of money to save for a mortgage. what makes it worse is that my parents are very well off and have watched us struggle (and suffer) over the years. I am sick of telling people that i rent cos of all this but should i have to? i know that this subject will come up in conversation tomorrow with some new friends i have made recently. Am sick of the puzzled looks i get when i say I RENT MY HOUSE!!

what CAN i say to just tell people its none of their beeswax?

OP posts:
FluffyMummy123 · 31/07/2008 19:10

Message withdrawn

Fimbo · 31/07/2008 19:11

Rent, own what does it matter?

Original poster
spudFace · 31/07/2008 19:11

why?

OP posts:
Original poster
spudFace · 31/07/2008 19:11

icod - why is it odd? how odd!

OP posts:
mankymummy · 31/07/2008 19:14

i couldnt afford my house now if i hadnt got on the property market 20 years ago.

tell them you are glad you dont own with the current state of the housing market.

infact i think the uk is quite unique in the percentage of home ownership.

Uriel · 31/07/2008 19:15

If you're bothered, lie!

lurkingdad · 31/07/2008 19:17

Tell them that a recent survey calculated that current house prices mean it is now cheaper to rent than buy, you are taking the more cost effective approach but just chose to take it long before every one else jumped on the bandwagon. And don't forget to remind people of all the DIY and maintenance that is not your problem.

Original poster
spudFace · 31/07/2008 19:17

to be honest i do frown upon people that live together with kids who are not married so I suppose that would really offend people - some people dont get married because they can not afford it!

OP posts:
TheSoapEatersMum · 31/07/2008 19:18

My mum still rents her house too, and she also gets comments. It isn't odd, if you can't afford to buy! It's sensible.

Upwind · 31/07/2008 19:20

I find it a useful friend filter. People really do turn up their noses quite often when they hear we rent. Reveals them as ignorant snobs

Don't explain further unless pressed, and then go with mankymummy's suggestion and cut off further enquiry by saying you are glad you don't own right now with the way prices are falling. If they keep on about it ask whether they could honestly afford their current home if they had to buy it now? And explain that is the position you find yourselves in for various reasons.

bigpolarbear · 31/07/2008 19:20

spudface, why do you need money to get married?

wotulookinat · 31/07/2008 19:21

We rent. I used to have a mortgaged place but couldn't afford the upkeep.
Ignore Cod. She's weirdo.

Tortington · 31/07/2008 19:22

why would you explain?

just dont - i have alays rented until recently - and no one ever said
"but why do you rent?" no- one ...ever!

and if they did i reckon i would say something about capitalist society making the rich richer

nnot thewayfor a nice light hearted convo

LyraSilvertongue · 31/07/2008 19:22

Spudface, you frown upon people who live together with children but aren't married?

That's me and DP. Why do you frown upon us? We've been together eight years and haven't got round to getting married what with having young children and all.

wotulookinat · 31/07/2008 19:22

Bigpolarbear, my partner and I would love to get married but can't afford to. At the very least, you need the money to register the bans (or whatever it is) and at least £40 on the day for the registry office.

mankymummy · 31/07/2008 19:23

why do you frown on people with kids who arent married?

what on earth do you feel about single parents then?!

LoveDietCoke · 31/07/2008 19:23

weddings are expensive bigpolarbear - thats prop what she meant?

we rent too - this is more or less cos of never raising enough for the flippin deposit!

expatinscotland · 31/07/2008 19:24

it's odd?

cod, you're so English your profile should be on a postage stamp..

wotulookinat · 31/07/2008 19:24

Hey Spud, I'm not frowning on you renting (coz we do too), so no need to look down on us un-married people.

JonahTakalua · 31/07/2008 19:25

There is a lot of frowning in your world, spudface.

Frown not upon those living over the brush, lest they frown upon your lack of mortgage.

piratecat · 31/07/2008 19:25

I think, for me to hear that you rent after 20 yrs together, does sound not the norm. Lets think, tho, 1987, what were house prices doing then? Wasn't there a bit of a price rocket going on then, and then a real slump in the early 90's.

I remember that me and ex dh only got onthe housing ladder back in 97 becuase prices were really affordable. We had a 2 bed place in london for a mortgae of 300 quid!!!

Did you ever consider it at certian times? I only ask cos it depends onwhat the market was doing.

Upwind · 31/07/2008 19:25

Custardo, you clearly hang out with a better class of people

We are always being asked. When we say we can't afford it they often mention that some overpriced and tiny flats are being sold in a sink estate somewhere that we could certainly afford. I ask whether they would want to raise there children there? With no storage space, little living space and dangerous neighbours? Especially given that renting a comfortable home is much cheaper.

StellaWasADiver · 31/07/2008 19:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

expatinscotland · 31/07/2008 19:26

i never get asked.

but then, IRL, people rarely ask me things that are none of their business, because i don't ask them things that are none of mine.

orangehead · 31/07/2008 19:27

I rent a hell hole house because we cant afford to buy, and despite the problems with the house Im am glad at the moment its sounds scarey being a home owner at the moment. At least my rent is constant at the moment