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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect my DH to wait until I've finished being sick before going to work and leaving DS unattended?

39 replies

waitingtobloom · 19/07/2008 16:02

ARGH! He knew I was being sick (still have morning sickness at 33 weeks pregnant) and he knew he was leaving DS (2 years old) alone eating yoghurt for breakfast yet he still left the house. He needed to leave for work apparently - he's self employed and working at a friends house so another 5 minutes would not have made a difference.

Last thing I heard was him shouting "are you ok" to which i mumbled "bleurgh" or something you mutter in between violent vomitting and then heard the door slam. Predictably when I got downstairs (as quick as possible in the situation) DS had covered the room and himself in yoghurt.

DH cant see the problem - he "needed" to go to work obviously.

Argh - more of a feeling sorry for myself rant than an AIBU! What I would give to make men pregnant for just a day...

OP posts:
Hecate · 19/07/2008 16:06

yeah, YABU, it's not like you were going to fall down the loo! You were only being sick.

But sympathies anyway, morning sickness is bloody horrible, isn't it?

I too wish men could be pregnant - especially since my husband once remarked that if men gave birth there would be no fuss, they'd just do it down the pub between pints. He's lucky to have escaped with both balls still attached!

partaria · 19/07/2008 16:15

But hecate it's more about what could have happened to op's ds ! Surely her dh could have waited a few more minutes ?

StellaWasADiver · 19/07/2008 16:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

kerryk · 19/07/2008 16:19

yanbu fecking men.

i had morning sickness for 9 fecking months so know what you are feeling like.

it used to inconvenience dh to have to pull over so i could be sick at the side of the road

i dont think its as much about what could have happened to ds, rather why should you be put in the position of having more work (cleaning up the yougurt) when you feel crap.

belgo · 19/07/2008 16:22

YANBU. I think the problem is, if you are being sick a lot, then your dh has expected you to be used to it now, and he no longer sees it as being a big deal. When of course it is still a big deal! In fact, the more you vomit, the more painful and uncomfortable it becomes (speaking from experience).

Hecate · 19/07/2008 16:22

Well, I remember when mine with babies and toddlers. I regularly went to the loo and left them in the living room. I used to go upstairs for a few minutes, or hang washing outside too! even small children are perfectly ok for a few minutes!

BetteNoire · 19/07/2008 16:23

I would have been annoyed by that too, waitingtobloom.

Puke in his shoes tomorrow morning.

kerryk · 19/07/2008 16:23

i left mine in the living room a lot younger than 2, but never with yougurt!!!

whatdayisit · 19/07/2008 16:34

YABU - I was sick everyday, throughout the day, for 8 months with DS2, so DS1 was often unattended for a few minutes. DS1 was 2 when he was born. Was DH supposed to say at home for the whole pregnancy?

Yes it's rotten, but like a lot of things to do with being a parent, you just have to get on with it I'm afraid. Sorry.

belgo · 19/07/2008 16:38

It would just have shown that he cared if he had stayed until you had finished. Sympathy and knowing some one cares is very important; it's not the same as expecting something unreasonable like being home the whole nine months.

lulumama · 19/07/2008 16:39

are you more upset he left you mid puke or left DS unattended with food? i would not leave a 2 year old alone with yoghurt, only due to the potential mess,

Original poster
waitingtobloom · 19/07/2008 19:15

Lol - it was the fact that he could have waited two minutes so I wouldnt have to worry about the inevitable yoghurt mess. And the fact that he is not sick and could run away out the door, lol.

Believe me I am sick a lot whilst alone with DS - am now "only" sick two or three times a day - was being sick 10 - 15 times easily. DS learnt the phrase "mummy sick" quite early on.

And yes I leave him unattended for a few minutes whilst am in another room, cooking cleaning whatever - was the yoghurt situation.

So really its just the fact he doesnt have to be pregnant whilst I suffer through another pregnancy (and have to clean yoghurt up lol).

He's having the next one ;)

OP posts:
Podrick · 19/07/2008 19:25

He is irresponsible as well as unsupportive; your ds could have choked if left alone

Hecate · 19/07/2008 19:34

Choked on yoghurt? Blimey. At 2, mine were outside crunching on snails!
[negligent mother emoticon]

Podrick · 19/07/2008 19:44

stop showing off hecate

ElfOnTheTopShelf · 19/07/2008 19:48

On a yoghurt?

Podrick · 19/07/2008 19:51

yes. stop showing off on a yoghurt.

Podrick · 19/07/2008 19:51

yes. stop showing off on a yoghurt.

lucykate · 19/07/2008 19:54

men do this kind of thing all the time, my dh went off to work one morning while i was sat on the loo with d&v, with dd sat on my knee, also with d&v holding the sick bowl ( iwas pg with ds at the time). i had to ring him on his mobile and say 'are you insane?, you need to come home now'

ElfOnTheTopShelf · 19/07/2008 19:55

I dont understand what you mean by showing off about a yoghurt?

Podrick · 19/07/2008 19:56

well you said it not me!

ElfOnTheTopShelf · 19/07/2008 19:59

I still dont get it.

Podrick · 19/07/2008 20:02

post 19:44:58 + post 19:48:26 = post 19:51:01

ElfOnTheTopShelf · 19/07/2008 20:03

Sorry, x posted, I was actually asking if you really could choke on a yoghurt

elmoandella · 19/07/2008 20:10

re snails. why are kids facinated with them? i'm forever telling ds off for trying to lick the ones in my back garden!

as for your dh leaving you. you should be glad he's taking his self employment seriously. once he starts being 5 mins late, then it'll be 10 mins. before you know it he's pulling half day shifts.

well. if that was me. i have to be very strict with myself with these things. perhaps he feels the same?