To be deeply concerned about DD's friend, yet not know how to say something to her parents?

[eekamoose]

Am not a judgey type, I hope. And a fairly relaxed parent. BUT ... DD's 7 year old friend is delivered to school by her father on his bicycle. She has a little saddle on the crossbar and rests her hands on the handlebars, so in effect she sits infront of her dad on his bike. They ride on reasonably quiet London streets. But neither the Dad or the DD wear a cycle helmet. I see this scenario every day and it just seems plain wrong to me. I like and admire DD's friend's parents very much ... I want to say something, but how? This has kept me awake worrying at night and I've even thought about putting an anonymous note through their front door!

WWYD?

Franny:

I cycle daily outside of rush hour along quiet residential streets to the shops or for a nice ride round the park.

I am the only person on the bicycle and am super cautious.

I may well buy a helmet one day, the next time I'm near a cycle shop or halfords or similar.

My friends, DD, on the other hand, is sitting on the crossbar of her father's bike. He has to look round/above her to see the traffic. She is a little 7 year old girl. They ride down a road in morning school run time that I would not ride down, even at quieter periods (not a motorway, not a dual carriageway, but still known locally as a main road).

Obviously I'm not going to say anything but if certain posters on here are emphatically stating they can't see any cause for concern then I'm afraid I think they're being deliberately obtuse.

don't get me wrong - I don't think you are being reckless, or that you must buy a helmet, or anything - but it surprises me that you don't wear one, when you feel so strongly about the girl not having one

I do agree with the people who say that getting on a bike in itself is a risk, and so is, for example, getting in a car

we do all have to weigh up risks for ourselves and judge accordingly - unusual to have one rule for yourself and another for other people, though

Never has been my intention to admonish, Piffle.

I saw something very sad at skateboard park the other day, btw
young chap about 12 or 13 wearing a helmet (the only one wearing one out of about a dozen skaters there) but he did not have the straps done up - had he fallen the helmet would have just flown off
I can only think he had promised his mother he would wear it, but found a way to still appear risky in front of the other skaters? and his mother of course would have no idea.... "did you wear your helmet today son?" "yes mum..."

eek
Sorry pedantry apology...
to admonish means: to reprove gently but earnestly

Thus admonish was exactly what I meant.

I assume none of us would be happy for our children to travel witout seatbelts in the car, so why would you let your child be on a bike without a helmet? The situation OP describes sounds more risky. There is absolutely no protection on a bike, but you are facing the same traffic just more exposed.

FairyMum, first of all it is against the law not to restrain a child in the appropriate way in a car (unlike on a bike) ; second of all, chances are the Dad is going at jogging pace maximum and so realistically, a fall at that speed of a metre or so is unlikely to result in a serious injury. Of course there is a small chance that they could hit by a vehicle at speed but the chances of that hapenning on quiet back streets are probably similar to being on foot. In any case, a child's polystyrene helmet isn't going to afford much protection in that scenario.

It seems to me people's calculation of risk is getting skewed. This morning my five year old was having a moment and refusing to get out of the car. I walked away and stood about 10 feet away, meanwhile another woman marched up to the car, glared at me and stood peering through the window obviously seeing herself as his protector. Ridiculous!

I see the "farly quiet roads" of the first post have now morphed into a "main road"!