Another example of the horrors of surrogacy. AIBU to think surrogacy should be banned?

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Another example of the horrors of surrogacy.

AIBU to think surrogacy should be banned?

Poor kids. What about the abuse of women who need money being used. None of it is morally acceptable.

“Each one of these defendants monitored the nannies’ discipline of the children that were happening in the three learning centers,” the district attorney said.
He said during one incident, a nanny had forced a child “to maintain a horse stance” and Xuan could be seen on video laughing.
“In another situation, defendant Xuan entered one of the learning centers while a nanny was striking a child, and instructed the nanny to strike the child harder,” he said.
Hochman alleged that Xuan also beat a child across the child’s bare buttocks and struck the child’s head.
“Defendant Xuan also lifted the child into the air by one arm, while continuing to strike him and repeatedly struck the child’s head from side to side with sufficient force that the child’s body lurched into alternating directions with the blows,” he told reporters.
He said the children were punished, physically abused and beaten “on a daily basis.”

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/california-couple-21-children-born-surrogates-charged-house-horrors-ab-rcna601931

It’s disgusting and what results when a child doesn’t have natural parent to protect them. I wonder whether the egg donors would feel any remorse if they knew these were their children?

I am not a fan of surrogacy and think laws need to be tightened. I've worked with surrogates and have felt very uneasy in the way the potential parents have viewed the surrogate

However I think the more pressing issue in that case is the fact the parents were abusive not that they paid surrogates

Do you view the stories of parents being abusive towards their biological children as evidence of the horrors of natural childbirth?

I recently listened to a podcast about this case, it is horrific. Even when the children had been taken into foster care, the surrogates who were still pregnant had no right to keep the baby they were carrying - one woman decided to bring the baby she was expecting home, but it was taken into care hours after the birth, even though the "parents" were being investigated by the police.

You think “natural parents” never harm children?

This is a horrible case, it's in the US though where they have so many dodgy practices around adoption, surrogacy and fertility. The surrogate mothers pretty much did it for financial reasons as well as altruistic ones and the intended parents billionaires or close. I don't think it would be possible here in the same way so think the law is fine

YANBU. Surrogacy is cruel to the baby who bonds in utero with mother (regardless of egg used in the pregnancy), exploitative and abusive.

Most surrogacy in the UK now is actually commercial cases where the baby is born abroad - despite commercial surrogacy being banned here. It’s ludicrous and a scandal in plain sight.

We need a global ban.

YANBU. People are not things to be bought and sold. Any person that buys another person is a vile, grotesque excuse for a human being.

The incidence is lower with bio parents

• Fatal Injury Risk: Studies published in Pediatrics and highlighted by UChicago Medicine found that young children living with one or more unrelated adults are roughly 8 to nearly 50 times more likely to die from inflicted injuries (such as being shaken or struck) compared to children living with two biological parents.
• Single-Parent Contrast: Contrary to common assumptions, research indicates that single-parent households with no other adults do not carry an elevated risk of fatal inflicted injury compared to two-parent biological homes.

Surrogacy is a red herring in this case.

I am against surrogacy as I believe it centres only the adults and the baby is a commodity.

However. I also recognise that it is easy for me to say that when I’m sitting here with two of my own children, who were conceived and birthed with ease.

It's not the fault of surrogacy is it? It's evil people that's at fault here..
Friend from uni was a surrogate mum for her best mate. Was the kindest thing I ever saw anyone do, incredible and it worked out well.

It’s not kind to buy or ‘gift’ one human to another. All it does is make human beings into a thing to own. It’s also not kind to put a friend through the potential impact pregnancy and birth can have-disability and death.

Her friend chose to be a surrogate.

i mean if that were true, no biological parents would abuse their kids. unfortunately not the case.

I believe some of the surrogate Moms have gone for custody

It's renting wombs and baby trafficking and absolutely should be illegal.

I'm sure more children born to their biological parents are abused to.

Well statistically that makes sense. The problem is a legislative system that is so lax it allowed one couple to have 21 children, mostly through surrogates, without not even an eyebrow being raised.

Yes, this is also why I've sometimes wondered whether children raised by couples who used a sperms donor are more likely to be abused by their fathers. There is very little research on this. The Cinderella Effect is thought to apply to stepfathers though there are some differences there

Natural parents? Some of those children were their own bilogical children. Just because they used ivf doesn’t mean they have infertility issues. They were just very rich and greedy and thought they could do what they wanted as they have so much money to throw around.

This is a story of the horrors of surrogacy because these people had managed to collect 21 children to abuse, which wouldn't have happened without surrogacy. Many people set out to abuse children whether their biological children, adopted, step or via some other relationship but this specific situation was enabled because paid surrogacy exists.

Yes of course that is true. They could've have had 21 children biologically and still abused them. But they didn't. They paid literally poor women to have a child for them, ruined their bodies, have their biological child removed. Then abused the child.

Surrogacy is in no way ok.

Agreed

I know what you mean, of course. However as a pp said above - this case highlights the transactional nature of surrogacy, how neither the child nor the birth mum, matters - and how the system of surrogacy being accepted, enables that abuse.

They really couldn't have had 21 biological children unless they met and married in their teens. They could only have this many through surrogacy and also only due to surrogacy being legal. If it was illegal in their country they wouldn't have been able to bring that many children in through immigration.

Having this number of children is all tied up with abuse - there do exist such large families by other means and there has to be some mental illness or similar even in birth families these days. There would be scrutiny even if light touch of a birth family this big, and the same if adoption or foster care. The parents need to have some kind of addiction to having new babies/children repeatedly.

However, she is an adult and was capable of making the choice herself, something your judgemental stance cannot fathom no doubt. Disability and death? How dramatic.

And bullshit over being a human being to own, are you against adoption too? Fostering? There are worse biological parents out there than the one who ended up with a beautiful, very loved child as in the case of my friend from uni.