To think people only want the best then complain about cost and stress

[Ohhhhok]

This does not apply to people living in poverty, in unsuitable accommodation, struggling to find work and to make ends meet whatsoever.

I feel like many people will not settle for anything less than the dream lifestyle- large house in a desirable area with fancy interiors and expensive appliances, nice garden, cleaner, new cars, high-end clothing and make-up, expensive restaurants and luxury holidays, and so on.

Then they complain about the cost of their mortgage, the stressful job where they work 60 hours a week with all the responsibility and the 2k a month childcare bill.

It seems like nobody is willing to settle for less, it's like you've got to have the above to have 'made it' in life- they wouldn't be seen dead with an older car, a terraced house or shock horror, a flat. Second hand clothing, living a simpler life.

When you says it's cost £2k to decorate a box room, you mean paint, new curtains, and a new carpet?

I think I'm struggling with how that could cost £2k, because when I've redecorated (with fairly expensive Dulux trade) the biggest bedroom in my house the paint cost about £125. Recarpetting my entire house, plus new flooring in the kitchen and bathroom, admittedly 3 years ago, but not in the dark ages, cost £2250 to get it done professionally, and if I was going to fit it myself they sell room sized remnants near me from £25. And I've never paid over £100 for a pair of curtains.

Oh please tell me what the hobby is! Are you a birder?! Entomology? Animal photography?

If you managed to carpet and hard floor an entire house for £2,250, professionally fitted, may I please ask what the sq ft is, the name of the supplier and the make of carpet/tiles.

The OP isn’t talking about buying cheap MDF furniture instead of solid that lasts - it’s about people who throw away a perfectly good sofa because it doesn’t match their latest colour scheme, which they change every few years. I see it on my neighbourhood facebook page - people getting rid of all sorts of decent furniture, decor or kitchen items because they’re the wrong colour or style. Trying to get someone to collect it the same day or it’s going to the tip. Such a waste, and they’ll be doing the same thing again in five years time.

I don’t know anyone who has that dream lifestyle. Most people I know are tired of earning less due to wage stagnation, paying more tax due to fiscal drag, spending a fortune on housing, childcare & living in general. Loads of higher earners I know have a terrace or a flat, a 2nd hand car, etc as that’s what they can afford.

It was a local carpet shop, a few hundred yards from my house, terraced house, two bedrooms, a hard wearing but quite soft and comfy synthetic carpet with decent underlay and their higher end vinyl flooring. I have literally no idea what brand they were! So cheap on the hard flooring front but with a fairly thick wear proof layer so it should last a decade or so. I was very clear when I was buying the flooring that I prioritised longevity of the carpet over the price at that moment because replacing them is a right hassle. I didn't get wool because a) I've lived in houses with carpet moth problems in the past, and b) I appreciate the fact that I can bleach it.

Same & of course millions more family had access to social housing then and many utilised right to buy. I don’t that would be described as settling!

Who are these ‘people’? You must have a very niche circle.

I already answered PP who said the same thing as you. I'm talking about my experience of a 1970s childhood. And of course worn out things would be replaced. They weren't replaced due to a wish to have a 'stylish' home. And as I also said, it may have been different then for those who could afford it.

I agree OP. It’s like eveyone is in a race to get “there” without really thinking of the jmpact to finances and health. I think it’s the influencers and instagram nonsense making peille think they have failed if they dont have this instagram fantasy lifestyle.

Whereas I see the majority goes on tax, childcare costs & housing costs and no it doesn’t mean they live in a mansion…..

I couldn’t afford my house if I had to rent it

Yes, social media has created this weird situation where some people seem to always need to be seen as living the best of lives. 🙄

@5128gapbut everyone has different experiences. I don’t know anyone who throws out a sofa after a few years because they want to change the colour scheme.

British homeowners typically moved house every 8 to 11 years, meaning people climbed the property ladder and relocated multiple times over their lives.

Today The average UK homeowner now stays in their property for roughly 20 to 21 years before moving, choosing instead to improve or renovate their current home.

@5128gap

Moving home is too expensive for many today plus people get on the property market much older. The concept of the ladder doesn’t really exist.

I think the current generation just want a basic standard of living that generations before had. If they grew up in a 3 bed home with a garden, they don't want to cram their family into a small flat. If they got a holiday abroad every couple of years, they would like the same. I think the trouble is this stuff takes much more working hours and graft to achieve now.

I think clothes and beauty treatments have really changed. Beauty treatments and standards are higher and more expensive but clothing is more throwaway and cheaper if you want it to be. People appear to have a lot of the frivolous stuff but less of the bigger stuff that provides security.

There are more opportunities to spend on tech than before, but that's advancing technology and cheap chinese production for you.

Keeping up with the Joneses is nothing new!

the snide comments about new cars probably misses that most of these are accessed via heavily subsidized work schemes with generous government tax breaks.

often more expensive running an old jalopy

@MandemChickenShop judging comes before thinking!

Lots of people mention Instagram etc. It isn't real! I don't know anyone who really lives exactly like this or aspires to it.

The people I know who have the money to spend are the older generations. Restaurants where I live are often full of older people. You can tell by the advertising on home improvement/holiday adverts that it is older people they target. I'm not saying they shouldn't enjoy their money, but wanting the best of everything isn't a younger generation thing. It's just about individual personality traits across generations.

I agree and my/our experiences reflect this:
81 to 86: flat
86 to 94: terrace
94 to 14: semi
14 to pres: large detached

Still have the bedroom furniture I bought in 1981 in the guest room; two armchairs were my dad's - re-upholstered; dining table, chairs and sideboard were my grandparents' (has been french polished, with seats re-upholstered.

I sort of know what you mean, OP.
There has always been "keeping up with the Jones" right? But maybe the issue is that so many of these things nowadays seem to lock you into a spiral of debt. Like, I can remember my nan splurging on new curtains because her neighbour got new curtains, and they cost a bomb and had to be paid off over a couple of months, and it was a funny family story. But my friend just got a new lease car for basically the same reason and she's locked in for three years and it's hundreds a month that she's going to struggle to reach and she is kind of freaked out about it. The car is beautiful and she loves it, but I think the initial excitement has given way to a bit of "Oh God!" about the cost.

This. What you actually see on here “all the time” is people like @scribbleblack ignore what is stated on posts and create their own narrative. In her case, like many, it boils down to envy.

I do. Though interestingly it's my in laws. Who I've watched catch the home improvement bug and are obsessed with perfectly good decor looking 'dated'. They're on their third kitchen in fifteen years, having moved through white to anthracite to forest green. They can afford it though.

It’s very odd

@5128gapbut since your experience of the property ladder wasn’t representative of the reality perhaps your in-laws attitude to decor isnt either….

My XH was like this. We should have been saving money but if we had it, he wanted to spend it. Then he would main about the hours he had to work in a stressful job to pay for it all.

Never ending upgrades. It’s brilliant having control over my own finances now.