AIBU to think of course all the anti-trans posts on this website and others are leading to real life harm?

[helpfulucy]

Just seen a video of a trans woman minding her business in a train station getting horribly bullied by some Tommy Robinson wanna-be and couldn't help but think back to all the aggressive threads I've seen on Mumsnet.

Pages and pages of vilifying innocent trans people, calling them perverts and all sorts with zero evidence of anything of the sort of course would lead to people like this harassing and attacking trans people in public. I've see a few of so-called GC brigade say 'this isn't what we wanted' but it is the end, isn't it? If you do see trans people as disgusting abusive perverts trying to sneak into your changing rooms and hurt your daughter, you'd want them to be bashed in public yeah?

Am I wrong to think their chickens are coming home to roost and certain posters will want to claim they never had a hand in it all?

That’s great. It’s a common pattern, isn’t it.

Respectfully, they very much are.

Have you posted on the X account on the man who posted the video. He didn't post in on MN but twitter. Perhaps deal with the man directly?

And yet they’re not. They’re instead screaming about being ‘genocided’ and wailing about how awful ‘terfs’ are for not validating them.

🎻🎻🎻🎻🎻

It's tragic and immensely sad. Poor children.

Look I get it, you’ve struggled with this issue with a child, you accepted it as you thought it was the right thing to do. MN telling you it’s not accepted makes you feel discomforted, so you argue on here, but we’re not really your issue. Your issue is you’ve bought into a delusion that’s expiring fast.

It’s not that MN is increasing hatred towards trans people. It’s that the hold they had in the early 2020’s is gone.

As PP said, wear what you want, you can’t change sex, and you can’t go into spaces for the opposite sex.

Calling parents abusers isn’t helping parents neither is lecturing to parents who know an awful lot more about a situation due to having masses of lived experience- particularly when said lecturing is not asked for or needed.

If their children are suicidal then they should be getting them immediate psychiatric help to deal with the underlying mental health issues

Exactly. It is so disturbing to hear that dc with mental health problems are not given the professional mh care that they need.

Well said. There’s a lot of support here on MN for struggling parents, a lot of sympathy. But obviously if people are trying to claim the impossible there will be pushback.

Parents of suicidal children don’t need to be told what the cause is they know. In the trans community it’s often down to bullying, mocking,discrimination- you know ,the behaviour you see on here.

Oh and there is no immediate psychiatric care. The MH system is broken and completely reactionary .

And stillbirth and miscarriage groups.
One man even pretended to be pregnant and decided that he was going to have a stillbirth and wanted women not only to support him but wanted women to accept that his "grief at his loss" should be treated just like theres.

Exactly 💯.

My friend's daughter said she thought she was trans. My friend listened and explained that she could dress how she pleased, that some females are more masculine and some more feminine and some in between but they are all female biologically. She said that she couldn't actually change sex and agreement that she could would lead to misery when she found out it was a lie. She went what she said was non binary for a bit, went through puberty, matured then said she realised she was female but felt 'different' to what she thought she should feel because she wasn't girly! Shes also on.the spectrum. She's vulnerable.

Fortunately, my friend didn't rush in with affirmation and took time. She didn't allow chest binders or other damage. Imagine a different outcome if she had gone full afirmation on her. She also managed to get counselling to help with her self esteem.

If only people could pause and wait. Offer counselling to any children who are in this position and calm facts.

1. How do you know what everyone is doing all day? You are arguing like a child.
2. It’s “en masse”
3. ”Women’s rights bullies” again, you are just childishly name calling.
4. Why don’t you engage with the actual arguments ? Why should women be happy to lose single sex services and spaces that were set up so women could participate in life outside the home safely? Women campaigned for their own toilets and separate prisons and fundraised for rape crisis centres. We want to keep them because we need them. We don’t want male people there.
5. Trans identified males should have campaigned for gender neutral or protection in male spaces. But they want the validation as “women” as much as safety.

No, women and girls cannot give up their rights and lie down in case children with gender identities are very distressed.

The point is, that there will have to be other ways to reduce and manage that distress. Sacrificing other people's rights to them - no. Not happening. It's a ridiculous and wholly unreasonable, unethical demand.

Can I have a caramel wafer instead please

This. Hope that’s clear.

I'm sorry you've had such a difficult time. I hope you and your family have all the support you need and can find a way through.

The system needs more money. These children need counselling help. Rather than spend time attacking women who don't want biological males in their spaces why not campaign for more mental health support to help with these issues?

You can but two posts are required for the wafer

And again it’s back to the fact that vulnerable or not, suicide threats are frequently an abusive method of controlling others. I have experienced this first hand within a coercive controlled relationship. Other people can’t be expected to do what the person wants them to do. We have our own issues.

Parents of anorexic children don't affirm the children is fat they try to deal with the underlying mental health problems.

If someone says they are suicidal then mental health issues are apparent and these need dealing with not just agreement that changing x y and z will sort the mental health issues because it won't.

It must be awful hearing someone feels suicidal but lying to them won't fix everything and trampling on women in the process wont help either. Self acceptance is a long process.

Best wishes for your child. I hope they find the ability to accept themselves for what they are.

Yes it's a method of control.

The Swiss cheese I see is usually the result of a TRA losing their shit before flouncing.

That said, I think you genuinely believe what you are saying, but what you are actually seeing is people saying some, maybe even many trans identifying men are X,Y or Z rather than all.

The only posts I ever see saying "all" trans people are X,Y or Z are

1 posters like you complaining about FWR and applying their own hyberbole about what is really being said. (FWIW, these posters say "all trans women are predators" a lot. It's their favourite accusation to claim we say.)

2 posters saying any trans woman who knowingly comes into female -only spaces is acting like a predator or at best is someone who will ignore women's boundaries if they conflict with his own desires. The former I disagree with, but the latter is undeniable.

3 me saying all trans people are sexist because a pre-requisite of believing in trans identies is believing that some ways of thinking/feeling/dressing are allowable for one sex but not the other. And that I stand behind.

But you’re on here lecturing to women you’ve never met on here…..l.