OP, please try to filter out some of the more dramatic suggestions on here and concentrate on the practical steps that can actually help get your daughter home.
I completely understand why people are angry on your behalf, but I would NOT start a smear campaign against Dad, contact his employer demanding they sack him, go to the press or plaster this all over social media. At this stage you need to be calm, methodical and very careful about what you put in writing. This may end up being evidence in proceedings in America.
Some of those routes may have a place later. For example, his employer might be relevant if they can help establish where he is living or working, and an MP may be useful if a UK government agency is being unresponsive. But neither his employer, the press nor an MP can order your daughter home. They should not become the main strategy and they certainly should not distract you from the Hague process.
From what you have described, I would do the following.
Tonight / immediately
Save the message where Dad says he is at the airport, is moving to America with your daughter and will not be returning her. Screenshot it, back it up and email a copy to yourself.
Save every subsequent message, missed call and voicemail. Do not delete anything.
Make one chronology while everything is fresh in your mind:
- when he collected DD
- what the agreed arrangements were
- when you expected her returned
- when you received the airport message
- exactly what he said
- when you discovered they had actually left
- every attempt you have made to contact him since.
- Gather DD’s birth certificate, passport details if you have them, any Child Arrangements Order, school details, GP details and anything showing that her ordinary home and life are in England.
- Write down everything you know about Dad’s whereabouts in America: employer, office, possible home address, relatives, friends, telephone numbers, email addresses, flight information etc.
- Report it to the police and obtain an incident/crime reference number. If somebody simply tells you, “He has parental responsibility so he can take her,” politely ask for the matter to be reviewed by a supervisor and explain that you are reporting the unauthorised international removal of a child, not an ordinary contact disagreement.
Tomorrow morning
Contact the International Child Abduction and Contact Unit (ICACU) and tell them very clearly:
“My six-year-old daughter was habitually resident in England. Her father took her during his contact time and removed her to the United States without my knowledge or consent. He has told me in writing that he has moved there permanently with her and will not return her. I want to make an urgent application under the 1980 Hague Convention.”
Also contact Reunite International Child Abduction Centre. They specialise in these cases and can talk you through the process.
If you can afford a solicitor
Do not just ring a random high-street divorce solicitor.
Look for somebody who specifically deals with international parental child abduction / Hague Convention cases. This is specialist work.
Send them the chronology and evidence rather than spending the first appointment trying to remember everything while understandably distressed.
Ask them specifically about:
- an urgent Hague return application
- whether any urgent English High Court orders would assist
- preserving evidence of your lack of consent
- locating DD if her precise location is unknown
- representation required in the United States.
If you cannot afford a solicitor
Please do NOT think that means you cannot start trying to get your daughter back.
You can approach ICACU directly. You do not need to have instructed a private solicitor before contacting the Central Authority or starting the Hague process.
Tell ICACU immediately that you have no funds for private representation and ask what assistance is available for an outgoing Hague application to the USA.
The US Central Authority can also help applicants seek lawyers through its Hague Convention Attorney Network, including asking for pro bono or reduced-fee representation where someone qualifies. It is not guaranteed in America, but lack of money is absolutely not a reason to sit doing nothing.
Reunite can also give you free specialist guidance and help you understand what you need to do next.
What I would NOT prioritise right now
Your MP might later be useful if you are struggling to get responses from a UK government department, but your MP cannot order America to return your daughter.
His employer may be relevant if the authorities need information about his location or employment, but contacting them to shame him or try to get him sacked is a completely different matter and could be counterproductive.
The press cannot order her return either.
Facebook or Mumsnet campaigns cannot determine where she should live.
The Hague Convention process can result in a US court ordering her return to England, which is why that needs to be your focus.
I would also be cautious about people pushing OP to demand arrests, criminal charges or public exposure immediately without taking specialist advice first. Criminal action and Hague return proceedings can interact in complicated ways, especially internationally, and the priority should be getting advice from people who actually deal with child-abduction cases rather than taking steps out of anger that could make matters harder.
And I really would urge everyone telling OP to “destroy him”, contact his workplace, expose him publicly etc. to calm down. I know those comments are coming from anger and wanting to help, but OP needs useful information rather than a pile-on.
OP, keep any communication with Dad incredibly simple and calm. Do not threaten him or tell him you are going to ruin his life.
Something along the lines of:
“I do not consent and have never consented to DD being removed from England or relocating to the United States. Please confirm immediately that she is safe, where she is staying, and arrangements for her return.”
Then preserve his response.
You can deal with what he has done and how you feel about it later. Right now the objective is very simple:
Locate DD. Preserve the evidence. Start the Hague process. Get specialist advice. Get her home.
One step at a time.