DD’s dad has taken her overseas and won’t bring her back

[CherryMummy1]

Me and my DD’s (6 years old) dad have been separated for 4 years. He had DD last weekend and has taken her overseas (he had her passport) and has moved overseas (America) with her and won’t bring her back! I had no idea that he was planning to do this! He has obviously been planning it for a while as he would have had to get Visa’s and plan his move to America and so on. He texted me on Saturday morning while he had DD saying that he was at the airport and that he was moving to America for work and that he was taking DD with him and wouldn’t bring her back! He hasn’t answered any of my calls or messages since. I’m going insane worrying about my DD. I’ve been absolutely in bits since, I’m an absolute wreck and can’t stop crying and worrying about my DD and just want her home with me! I’m DD’s primary parent so can’t imagine how scared and upset she must be feeling without me! The police here in the UK won’t do anything as they are saying her dad also has parental responsibility like me so there’s nothing they can do. Social services are refusing to get involved as well. AIBU to think that the police and authorities should be doing more to get my DD home? I’m absolutely in bits and can’t stop crying over it all! I’m furious and livid with her dad too, I’m absolutely raging at him with anger for doing this

Sorry for the late reply, it’s been a long day! So the solicitor who I spoke to today said she wasn’t an expert in this area so I’ve contacted one of the law firms recommended on this thread and I have a meeting on Monday.

I’ve contacted Reunite and the ICACU as well

I’m still distraught though. I keep thinking how scared and upset my little girl must be without me and so far away, I keep crying about it

My friend tried to call my DD’s dad today and he didn’t answer the calls or messages from my friend either.

I realise how distraught you are about this and how you probably can't stop thinking of all the worst possible outcomes for you and your DD. Having said that, it is possible that your little girl isn't experiencing this as anything other than an exciting venture with her father. She's only 6 and possibly has no conception of how far away from you she is or what that might mean for her ability to see you in the future. I realise this probably isn't much help to you, but you have so many practical things that you do need to be focused on right now that grieving for your daughter's safety and well-being possibly isn't the best use of your emotional energy. Why would she be scared or upset if she's with her DF? He's probably treating her to lots of exciting new things. She will have no concept of the trauma her absence is causing you. I'm not saying this to diminish her or your situation, but to perhaps help you cope with the practicalities of getting her back -- which I hope will be swiftly resolved for you.

You could ask your friend if the ringing tone she got when she rang him was the usual (UK) one or if it was different. That would suggest if he is in the UK or abroad (I think).

https://www.gov.uk/looking-after-children-divorce/apply-for-court-order

Hi op, it can be hard to keep going over the weekend when things go quiet with legals etc. call women's aid or the Samaritans if it feels too much alone.

The above link is for a prohibited steps order, you can get these done exparte urgent hearings with a few of a few hundred pounds or less if eligible. It's worth looking into

I am not a legal person at all but I've had previous international abduction attempts from my DCs father, I'm still working hard on my own situation so I've just been lurking but wanted to reach out.

Has anyone mentioned Hague mothers to you yet. Might be worth a look if not.

Stay focused op. She needs you calm and methodical. There's been some good advice here and lots of women rooting for you. If I think of anything else that might help you I'll post again I have to lay low because my exP is not a good person.

If you can't face food try protein drinks like Huel. Sending thoughts x

It was a different ringing tone so he’s definitely overseas unfortunately

OP do you know any member of his family in England?

Have you checked the I-94 records, as a PP suggested? It's extremely unlikely that your DD has a US passport, so there should be a record of her arrival.

What was the reason you made an appointment with the solicitor you spoke to today? Did someone recommend them to you?

In London the experienced lawyers firms for Hague abduction are Hunters Law, International Family Law Group and Dawson Cornwall - their contact details and others are on Reunite website

As the "left behind parent" you should get legal aid

Stay strong

I suspect it might be possible for him to have forged the consular record and passport approvals. So I'm not as sanguine as others about him failing to get a US passport.

Not if she entered via the land border. He could have flown her into Toronto on her British passport, and simply driven over the border into New York with her CRBA. From Pearson airport it’s about an hour and a half drive to Buffalo. Once in the U.S she can take internal flights with just a boarding pass.

This would be incredibly simple for him to do. He had no need to forge documents to try and obtain a passport or visa for her.

Your ex would be a complete fool if he forged your signature or submitted false information on a passport application. That is a very serious felony in the US.

Has anyone on the thread mentioned the Children's Passport Issuance Alert Program? If so, sorry to repeat this information. The program is precisely for situations like this one. They alert parents if someone has attempted to apply for a passport for their child.

https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/International-Parental-Child-Abduction/prevention/passport-issuance-alert-program.html

He'd have to forge something to get her CRBA though.

No, he wouldn’t. Only one parent needs to apply for a CRBA. It isn’t like a passport that needs the signatures of both parents.

@CherryMummy1 Of course you're distraught but try to take heart in the fact that if he's genuinely taken your DD to the US, he's committed a crime and he WILL face consequences.

@CherryMummy1

https://freemanssolicitors.net/team_members/nina-hansen/

For the last time, you are misunderstanding this and creating imaginary scenarios. FS 240 is the CRBA itself, that link refers to basically issuing a copy of it. You can see right there it says you need to submit DS 2029 to get the CRBA, that process requires both parents to know. Go to the website of any British embassy anywhere, it will say both parents need to agree to the CRBA.

I don't know why you think you know more than those of us who have been through the process but it's not helpful to create these wild scenarios, if OP is going to find her DD she needs to focus on more likely paths.

it is not a wild scenario at all, but the most obvious route into the U.S that doesn’t involve forgery.

“There is no two-parent signature requirement for a form FS-240 with respect to permission to issue. In the case of a child involved in a custody dispute, either parent may apply for the form FS-240 regardless of which parent has been awarded custody. In the rare event that separate applications are received from both parents, as in the case of a divorce, approve the application received first. Once the form FS-240 has been issued, the other parent may obtain a form FS-240. Direct questions about a Form FS-240 and a child custody dispute to CA/PPT/S/A ([email protected]).“

Form DS 2029 is the application for the CRBA. The American parent can apply for it alone. If the non citizen parent applies for it, then the citizen parent needs to submit an additional form giving permission.

The two signature requirement is for the passport. Usually a CRBA and a passport are applied for at the same time, so yes, in those instances both parents need to present and/or give consent, but that is for the passport. Not the CRBA.

That person is beyond tiresome. makes you wish mumsnet had a block functionality
They think because they asked chatGPT then they are an expert when they are just loudly wrong but they just keep doubling down and being annoying in the thread. they are not helping and it just clutters up the thread with their nonsense

I’m not claiming expertise. What I’m stating is information provided by the relevant government bodies that you are more than welcome to peruse yourself, given that I have provided links (and not to ChatGPT, funnily enough). Perhaps, instead of simply stating I’m wrong, you could direct me to your sources?

It is entirely plausible that he has in fact taken her to the U.S, and done so without needing to forge any documents. It isn’t helping anyone to insist that this couldn’t possibly be the case simply because that is what you would prefer to believe.

The UK and America should both be on the same terms with this. I hope it is sorted quickly but will say your ex has made a massive mistake. He is hoping you give up. Don't though,

@CherryMummy1 I think the best thing you can do now is start a facts based diary and capture your evidence in an organised way. This will help to keep the legal costs as low as possible because time won’t be wasted trying to explain things.
Date, Time, medium of communication, what was said. Then save the evidence in a file and label it in chronological order.
Also, have you checked your home insurance? Sometimes this comes with legal cover which might be helpful. Always worth checking.

That wasn’t helpful, did this not become apparent when you booked the appointment? Did the solicitors office not ask for any details of the advice you wanted?

Such a waste of time.