To ask if my boyfriend doing this last night is ‘normal’?

[Helenaslide]

I was having a bath last night and he came in and used the loo (no.2). I shouted and asked what he was playing at and he said he has always done this with partners and vice versa as have plenty of people he knows. He stayed for a couple of minutes until he had finished and left laughing.

For context - together 4 months, he was staying at mine last night.

He has said he won’t do it again but I feel a bit humiliated by it tbh.

Was married 20 years, never did a number 2 in front of each other. Had a wee and also two babies though not at the same time 😁

get rid of him 🤢🤢

Yup. Like a male baboon, shitting on his territory to mark his place and let OP know that UG UG HE DA BOSS. Not a chance. Out on his shitty arse with him. 🥾

This makes it seventeen billion times worse. He did it on purpose.

This isn’t the same guy who tipped the wine on the restaurant floor on the first date is it?

Bodily function blind spot? I don’t call not wanting someone shitting while you’re in the bathroom a blind spot, it’s called having standards

Oh Lordy I remember him!! Surely he didn’t get a second date!

That's never happened to me, I'm in my fifties. If he knocked on the door and asked and said he was desperate etc that would be understandable, but even then I would get out of the bath. Hardly the vibe you're going for I'm sure. He's an idiot.

I would hate this. I also wouldn't like DH peeing in front of me either. It's not just about the act itself, bath time is private time IMO and I would be also annoyed if DH just popped in to get something.

Reading the replies has made me realise it was likely deliberate/making a point

If there were other loos in the house then yes he was.

I don't understand why anyone would want to engage in such a private activity in front of anyone else. Do you think he gets a kick out of it?

Absolutely fucking not. There’ll be someone along in a minute to tell you you’re ridiculous and ‘what about when you’re in labour’ but I’m here to tell you that my husband witnessed everything that went with labour but outside of uncontrollable illness I will never in my right mind deliberately defecate in front of him. If he were to do it in front of me I would never be able to find him sexy again.

Unless it was medically needed (he was ill) it is absolutely disrespectful especially when it was obvious you weren't happy.

Nipping in a wee if it's the only toilet is fair although at only 4 months in I possibly would expect to ask to even do that.

Esp as just read OP has 3 loos. Fgs!
We have one... high on the list of the next house is two loos!

Absolutely humiliation I hope you asked him to leave? I wouldn't see him again

We're fine with it... have been since we were about 18 - clearly we're not all the same.

If he was desperate and you only have one toilet then he should have given you the heads up to get out of the bath. No, this is not normal behaviour.

Edit: Just read you have three toilets - no bloody way should he be doing that!

He was definitely making a point, and most likely setting up by offering to bring you a drink. Dump him (as it were).

Wow - he's very strange then as he's choosing to make her feel uncomfortable.

Holy shit (🤣) that’s so much worse! If there was only one loo, I might think it was desperation. 2 other loos to choose from makes this quite appalling.

That is just gross. He is a literal animal marking his territory and making sure you know it. Disgusting. I would never want to set eyes on him again. Don’t be foolish and stay, get rid, it’s only been 4 months so not even any emotional investment. I left someone because he said to me during a disagreement ‘you think your shit don’t stink’. No man speaks to me like that and stays.

Thats minging 🤣 dh and i have been together 13 years and it would never happen.

Absolutely not.

Dump.

Sorry couldn’t resist.

I’ve never in 24 years seen dh do a shit - I think he saw me shit myself during labour but I’m saying that doesn’t count - I wasn’t encroaching in his personal space!
I do understand that there are certain conditions which mean you don’t have as much control as others as to when you need to open your bowels but neither dh nor I have them so for me this is an unacceptable situation.

He has said he won’t do it again but I feel a bit humiliated by it tbh.
Chances are that was his intention. He could have used another WC. Why bring you a glass of wine (nice gesture) then take a smelly dump in front of you (revolting) and laugh about it?

Pls say you're getting rid of ShitBoy.

Gross - So disrespectful! I couldn't have this!

My current cat won't but I had a cat with heart issues and he stayed upstairs so I put his litter tray in the bathroom. He enjoyed having a poo at the same time I was on the toilet. Troy died aged 5. No human has and I haven't in front of anyone either.