AIBU to keep our lights up despite neighbour complaining?

[AutumnLighting]

We moved into our house just before Christmas last year. We are one of 6 houses on a lane in an u shape and our house is directly opposite one of the other houses. All of the houses are set back so we are not close to the houses opposite.

When we moved in last year, we put up lights on our house and in two of our trees at the front of our house as well as 2 nutcrackers and a Christmas wreath on the door. Nothing garish, just white lights. Every time we saw the neighbours opposite they would comment on the lights and decorations. They said things like that’s is a lot of lights, did you leave any in the shop for anyone else, we certainly can’t miss you etc. We took the lights down in January.

This is now our first autumn in the house and my husband has put up some lights along the front of the house, a garland around the front door and a wreath on the door. We went out for the evening and have come home to a note from the neighbour opposite which said she doesn’t like the lights, none of the past neighbours have ever put them up and that the lights will give her migraines like the ones we put up at Christmas did. She would like us to remove the lights.

How do we respond to this? My husband thinks we just ignore it but I said she will talk to us when we see her if we don’t go over and talk to her about it. He said he’ll tell her not to look at the lights. What would you say? We obviously plan to put the lights up for Christmas again this year so that isn’t going to go down well either.

We know she has moaned about other things to some of the other neighbours like their grandchildren playing outside on their bikes so she seems to be a moaner.

I really don't understand this and I'm probably going on my own annoyance with neighbour across the road, why ? You can't see them unless you're sitting in your garden, your neighbour can, constantly, it's really irritating especially all year long. The only way I can get away from them is having my curtains closed and tbh sometimes I actually like to open them and sit in my sitting room and watch TV without the freaking glow, flash of fairy lights jan to Dec

Flashing ones are awful - no matter how gradual you may think they are. The blue ones are a hate crime against eyeballs. If you want wreaths and garden gnomes for every season, knock yourself out. But lose the lighting effects.

I think it's very inconsiderate to stick a load of lights on the front of your house for your neighbours to see. Don't understand that behaviour at all.

What on earth are autumn lights ? Sound awful tbh I’m with your neighbour. Why would you want to upset them just wait until Xmas like most people!

Flashing lights have caused me problems since my stroke 3 years ago, so Christmas lights can be an issue for me walking around our village over the Christmas period.

I know the neighbour doesn't seem to be mentioning it from this angle, but I think it's worth highlighting as many people won't be aware of the issues they cause.

We already have lighting out the back.

My daughter went back to college today. My son is going back to uni at the weekend.

Agree with everyone. Not flashing is ok,flashing is not.

Why are people saying she won’t see them, only the neighbours will? Do people know you can look out of a window from the inside too?

The lights we have just put up do not flash. I will happily have the Christmas lights on a setting that doesn’t flash so I will say that when I see the neighbours. I don’t nk that will solve anything though because she is moaning about the ones we have now which don’t flash and she can hardly see due to them being low and the hedges obscuring the view.

We can see them from inside as our house is an L shape. We also see them when we come home which is nice.

Get rid of the flashing if that's the issue, but otherwise she sounds really unreasonable! You're entitled to decorate how you like for the seasons and your wreaths or static lights are nothing to do with her

Come to a compromise. Say they won’t clash and you will turn them off at 9.30. Honestly I am really sensitive to light and they do give me severe headaches

Flash not clash but that too!

Why have you put a garland and wreath up in September? Surely a few dimmed drive / garden lights would suffice.

Sounds like you want the attention.

I too struggle with migraine and asked another neighbour to take down CDs they’d hung in their trees to stop the birds coming into their garden. The flashes were coming into my home and I was having to sit with my curtains closed! They couldn’t have been any more apologetic when I explained the reason for asking them to take them down.

YABVU to inflict lights on your neighbours when they’ve asked you not to and told you the reason why.

She’s probably given herself a migraine straining to find something to moan about.

These autumn lights sound really tacky and the Christmas ones even worse. And as others have said, the unnecessary light position is terrible for wildlife.

If I were OP’s neighbour I would be really pissed off too.

Please reconsider OP. And switch off the garden lights while you’re at it. Birds, bats and hedgehogs will thank you.

Down the road put up inflatable illuminated ghosts about now, then after Halloween, its inflatable Santa and Snow men all the way to New Year. So tempting to buy an air rifle and snipe them off.

Poor neighbour is thinking, “Autumn, Halloween, Firework night, Christmas…..”

No wonder she has a headache.

I wouldn’t take any notice of her. You have said your houses aren’t close to each other and the view is obscured. She’s sounds like one of those neighbours that like to whinge and they are best ignored. If she approaches you, refer her to your husband and he can tell her not to look like he said.

Warm white, non-flashing I think is perfectly reasonable. I love a bit of warmth and cheer as the nights get earlier. Flashing of any kind, no, never.

So they are on even when you aren’t at home?

Lovely. Not.

Ignore her.

Yes.

Doesn't she have curtains @AutumnLighting?

You could turn them off as soon as you are indoors, if you're feeling neighbourly? ˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚＊·̩̩̥͙