Me and DH are married 10 years we have one DD6. She is smart and funny she does well at school/sports has loads of friends etc but like most 6 year olds she can be hard work at home sometimes. She can sometimes react disrespectfully shout and give snappy/rude answers to me and DH usually if she is tired/hungry/frustrated.
Somehow DH blames this on me.
Today DH collected DD from school as he was off I wfh so would usually have her snack ready when they get home and would come down from work for a few mins when she gets in to see how her day was but I couldn't do that today as an urgent work call was scheduled during that time
I asked DH to explain that to DD on the way home (as previously she has had a loud meltdown when I was unexpectedly not available when she got home).
Anyway when my call finished at 4 I went down and DD ran to give me a big hug and squeeze I asked her a few questions about her day and she told me a couple of stories about school.
I noticed DH in a bit of a sulk and when we were alone he said she hadn't told him anything about school and had been snapping at him/being disrespectful. He told me that it was my fault because I made him the bearer of bad news (because he had to tell I was on a work call and would be unavailable)
He told me thar I need to have a chat with her about how she treats him.
Dd has always had a strong preference for me but if I'm honest I think DH without realising it can come across as constantly criticising and negative e.g coming in from work and the first thing he will say is "turn down the music" "pick up those toys" etc rather than having a nice interaction with her first after not seeing her all day. He does it to me also.
I don't think he's being reasonable blaming this on me. I will talk to DD later but honestly I think he should be having the conversation as I wasn't even there to see what she said