1st cousin marriage

[Wiseplumnet]

AIBU to ask your opinion on 1st cousin marriage?.I have read that the government is looking to ban it. I know it is more prevelent ( but declining) in the UK among people of Asian origin. I am not coming from a judgemental or racist angle. I am just interested to know how mum'snetters of all ethnicities feel about marriage between 1st cousin's. I know it used to be more common in the west at one time, apart from keeping money/property in families, people travelled less widely, so there was less choice of marriage partners.I worked with a girl ( White British) who was in a secret relationship with her 1st cousin and they are very reluctant to tell their family, so there seems to be a cultural taboo in 1st cousins being romantically involved.Genetic factors resulting in disabilities (statistically twice as many as in unrelated parents) is sometimes given as a reason for banning cousin marriage, however we have genetic screening now, and disabilities aren't always serious.As so many babies died in infancy before we had vaccines, better health care etc , it was probably difficult to differentiate whether the close relationship between parents was the cause of any disabilities their children . Speaking for myself,I can't imagine wanting to marry any of the cousins I was brought up with as they seem more like brothers to me, but I could understand why someone may be attracted to a 1st cousin who they first met as adults. Or does it give you the instant 'Yuk' ? Also is banning 1st cousin marriage the same as banning 1st cousin sexual relationships and children, or would that become illegal? Maybe there's no need for a legal ban as the tradition will just die out over time

Do you think sibling marriage should be legal?

Any birth risks deformities. If someone is born with a genetic condition that can be passed down should they not be allowed to have kids?

Even if studies somehow prove there is no genetic issue, which I doubt will ever happen, I think it should be banned.

Close family ties in marriage provides too much opportunity for control and abuse. Marriage should only happen with the free consent of both parties, without any family pressure.

A ban might prevent the rare set of true loves from marrying, but in exchange it protects far more vulnerable people from being forced into unwanted marriages.

As to the argument that some cultures will simply skip the legal marriage, I think that is something that needs to be addressed for all people. Children need to be taught about the legal protections and legal complications of marriage in school. Many people do not understand the contract.

Definitely ban.

Most first cousin marriages are arranged / forced marriages and would be a good legal tool to protect young women from being forced to marry their cousins

I’m not even saying I think first cousin marriage should be legal.

I just don’t think an argument based on “there’s a risk to any children” is particularly valid when we don’t consider that in any other cases.

I have no strong feelings either way, but am always baffled at the strength of feeling it elicits on here. I mean, at least with Harry and Meghan you get a tabloid soap opera, tell-all interviews, indiscreet memoirs etc.

Should be banned

Cos the third generation immigrants here don't seem to be waking up to the disabilities that it causes

I watched a TV programme where a young Asian lady examined the effect of 1st cousin marriage on genetic problems. The incidents of children being born with problems was much higher in 1st cousin marriages that the national average.

Yes, it’s about the same heightened anomaly risk as having a baby with a mother over 36.

So brother/ sister father/ daughter marriages should be seen as fine as long as they’re both over 18, or even 16 in parts of the UK?

Bradford has some of the highest levels of birth defects in Europe. It also has a lot of Pakistani origin families, where it is considered a way to retain family wealth and get more family members' visas to come over here. When it happens generation after generation the genetic issues compound. It should be banned, and cousin marriages that take place overseas should not be recognized for visa purposes or be considered family life within any human rights regulations. I doubt many are spontaneous, and I'm sure most are pressured by family. One Pope banned marriage up to the 7th degree of kinship, which included distant relatives as far out as second cousins once removed which transformed Europe for the good. 1st cousins is a start but may not be the end point.

I’ll bite.

I think it’s incredibly selfish for adults to have children knowing that they carry a genetic disease that will likely be passed down.

They should go for genetic screening first to ensure they don’t pass it down.

But @ACynicalDad they are already in massive decline and continue to be falling. As many people now shun the idea.

Infact cousin marriages in the UK's British Pakistani community have declined significantly, dropping from 39.3% to 27.0% in Bradford over the last decade.

Therefore if the problem is naturally resolving i think the government should spend on other urgent pressing issues.
COL crisis, youth unemployment housing etc.

I agree it should be banned but I don't think the government should be spending time and money on the issue.

Norway, Sweden, China - all banned it. We should too.

Have you seen Deliverance?

This won't cost to legislate, and in reality, there is little you can spend on enforcement, but it sends the right signals and hopefully encourages this to stop far quicker. 10% a decade has a long way to get to 0%

How can they prove they are/aren't first cousins. They could lie

I wasn’t making what I thought was a controversial statement looking for someone to bite.

I think the question of passing down genetic illnesses is a reasonable discussion given the science we have now. I just hear that concern a lot more when the subject of 1st cousin marriage comes up.

I know someone who was tested for huntingdons before she had children, and she wouldn’t have had them if she’d tested positive. Partly because of the risk of passing it down, partly because she knows what it’s like to watch a parent die from it. I think most people would think what she did was sensible. I don’t think anyone would suggest that she should be banned from marrying unless she tests negative for the gene.

Why allow one and not the other? Two consenting adults, and love is love isn't it?

If children of identical twins married, its the sames as half siblings marrying 🤮 and still legal.

It's very normal in some cultures, especially Islamic. I remember reading that in Saudi Arabia something like half of marriages are between first cousins.

Banning it will probably just lead to people not getting legally married in the UK, they will just get a religious marriage, which puts women at an unfavourable position if they seek a divorce.

Better education about the risks of multi-generational first-cousin marriage is the solution. Schools, places of worship and community centres should be raising awareness of the risks in the communities where this practice is common.

I've name changed for this.

Me and my first cousin had a romantic relationship for a couple of years. We were eachothers first love. Currently im the only women he has ever loved. We both kept it secret and still do. I married someone else.he has had a few shortish relationships. The only reason we aren't together is because we are cousins. We didn't plan to fall in love so deeply and my heart is still broken that I dont have him. The shame we feel is massive.

Both white Scottish

First cousin marriages amongst some communities are widely accepted. The issue quite often is that it extends down into subsequent generations so the effect of genetics is magnified.

I used to work in a town with a sizeable Pakistani community and the prevalence of first cousin marriages was significant, with a concomitant rise in birth defects.

I think, in this day and age, we should ban first cousin marriages and relationships.

I agree with you but indications do suggest it is declining rapidly.
It always cost money to introduce legislation regardless how easy it seems to general public.

It can send the message but in reality how can it be policed.
It is very popular within the travelling community too.
Government should be focusing on spending money on more pressing issues.
This is just a distraction to the difficulty and challenges citizens are currently experiencing.

I am Asian. I think it should be banned.

Cousin marriage is not prevalent amongst all Asians- in fact some types of Asians specifically ban it themselves- so we won't be offended.
Another instance of how the word ' Asian' contains multitudes.