AIBU to feel fed up about how much summer holidays cost?

[jumpinthecoolpool]

Summer is nearly over thank god and despite trying we’ve spent an absolute fortune. Free things never actually are, there’s always a catch. I got fooled by a kids eat for £1 the other day and it still cost £40 for two adult meals and an hour in a tiny soft play my eldest was bored with after ten minutes.

Has anybody managed not to haemorrhage money? Have had some subtle criticisms from DH and I’m tired of it.

I appreciate it’s only a minor element but why are you carrying 15 drinks? That’s mad! Mine just have their water bottles, which we refill, and they carry their own

Well it's cost a lot in holiday clubs, and we've only actually had to use 9 days total, but I've also taken some days unpaid, and then a week's annual leave for DH and I together, and an additional week for him (he has more leave than me).

Activities wise not too bad - we had a fairly expensive day out at an attraction but that was part of DD's birthday present. We're NT members and have made full use of that, it's always a couple of quid for the trail but there were lots of other free crafts and activities going on, plus an overpriced ice cream a few of the times, but otherwise free with a picnic from home. Went to a forest yesterday, free in theory but £12.50 parking for 4 hours, and £4 for a Julia Donaldson trail.

Lots of walks/ time in garden/ trips to the park etc otherwise. I don't feel like it's been too bad, but DD is only 6 and still happy with a picnic in the park mainly, and the lovely weather has helped.

Pre Covid refilling points were becoming more common but a lot of them were taken away and not replaced. I've been out and about a lot this summer and the only time I've seen one is in an airport (obviously as they won't let you go through security with liquids).

This year has been unusually hot and humid in many places though.

I was waiting behind a woman in a Costa yesterday who wanted to refill a bottle (I think cafes have to provide tap water if you ask?) and they weren't being very helpful tbh.

Plenty of not particularly remote places have very poor public transport. I have a friend who doesn't always have access to a car and it really limits what you can do when you meet up (limits free stuff ironically enough). When I moved to this town, there were buses every 15 minutes up and down my street so we're hardly in some rural backwater. They've just been cut and cut.

These threads always turn into "how you're doing mumming wrong" / if only you lived in my area with all the subsidised and volunteer led stuff 😂

As we had a family holiday this year (2 weeks abroad, SC) we have had a cheap summer but we are in central London so lots of free and cheap stuff to do.

This week the kids have been to the woods, Hyde park and today they are off for a bike ride along the canal and will have an hour or two in the local adventure playground. I have made packed lunches for them all each day and we have grabbed ice creams from the Supermarket when out and about.

It still costs a little bit with adult travel (DP has this week off, I am WFH) but it can be done pretty cheaply.

In the holidays we've also done the British Museum, Walthamstow Wetlands, Tate Modern, British Library as well as a few separate walks along the Thames (in different directions), local nature reserve, splash park (we've been there lots), bike rides and canal walks, local parks, other Royal parks (St James' is our fave!), meet ups with friends and family. Plan is to head to a City Farm tomorrow although weather looks set to turn.

London has a lot of issues but it is unbeatable for cheap and free stuff!

That's a shame. Being in a remote rural area, but you still have to take them to play centres. It'll be ok when he's older.

That's a good idea. Could even choose a meal from the supermarket that they could cook or help cook depending on age. Maybe even bake a cake or something for dessert.

Summer camp £274 per week for 5 weeks and then a week family camping

And the time (almost always of women) that making things work cheaply takes. While trying not to make your employer too annoyed.

I do really admire my in laws who have brought up two kids on an absolute shoe string, but I have/had absolutely no desire to replicate it.

£1,370? for how many children?

@PatriciaRocks - oh not it’s not play centres. We have none anywhere near. Just regular playgrounds you know with sand, water play, slides, climbing frames etc. or just to kick a football around on flat area

Mine need holiday clubs at £40 per day each for some of the holidays (as we both work). That means that on those days that I’m home with them we can be home…
also… play dates. Play dates with mum friends. Lots of them… your home. Their home. The local park… always the local park, it will be full of people in the same situation… you’ll make new friends

Oh I see. It's annoying that you don't have a flat space.

agree. We spend hundreds and hundreds on holiday camps and holiday clubs.
NT membership is good value, picnics cheaper than eating in cafés etc. walks and bike rides are free and all ages enjoy. And seaside day trips depending on your location.

It's not been so bad for us as grandparents have done childcare for one DS8 but it is getting harder as he gets older. He doesn't want to do the local NTs (neither do we tbh, how many times can you walk around Lacock Abbey in 7 years without getting bored). We used to have a Longleat membership but they included Cheddar Gorge and used that to jack the prices up to £400 for 3 of us.
I think this is just parenting though. I spent a shit load of money on mat leave keeping myself sane (coffees, parking, lunch with NCT friends, outlet shopping, train fares) and it's not really stopped!

I feel more need to organise stuff as I have an only child (friends with siblings who don't get on or big age gaps, feel similarly).

If you have plural kids who do get on reasonably, that's the dream, isn't it? My Dsis and I were mostly left to play with each other, but I found it easier to make friends than she did so I don't think her summers were particularly positive once she got older. She did like playschemes more than me though.

It is good to have evidence though. I always tot up roughly what we spend, compare to previous years etc. Round here day camp is £40-£60 depending on hours. You can buy a LOT of coffee, ice cream and parking for that!

I thought playdates would be the answer for us. But I've found over the years they really aren't. Firstly all the friends seem to be on days out,holidays , at grandparents at clubs or holiday clubs. So over the whole 6 weeks we have only managed 2 play dates. Then if you have multiple children they don't always get on so as the parent you are the referee for the whole day.

Then there's getting in a few more easy foods or ice lollies/treats for them. Out of the 2 we managed only one reciprocated back. If its a sleepover you've got the late night's and grumpiness all out of routine that seems to linger for days after. The house usually gets a little bit trashed/something gets broken in all the fun and games.

@jumpinthecoolpool they (kids) cost an absolute fortune. Mine are 17 and 15 now so I’m nearly at the end of it but I do look back and think wow 😮 how did we get through the costs involved of taking them on holiday, clubs, days out etc.. and then school foreign trips on top as well as making birthdays and Christmases special. It’s all just soooo much money.

Nothing is free.

I’ve said one more holiday - nothing else - and that’s it for 6/7 years as we need to move on to paying for Uni.

Then our money is our own. Their holidays costs are their own. It’s a long road OP, buckle up!

So you chose to be in that situation. Suck up those parking costs. They should treble parking costs to encourage people to walk, bus, cycle more.

Just like school run parents making everyones lives hell at collection/dropoff, its a nightmare on the roads in school holidays due to all the parents ferrying children here there and everywhere. The standard of driving most certainly drops too.

I never found it easy to arrange playdates either. Literally no-one is just hanging around here. They're either trying to WFH, co-ordinating with the other parent (if divorced/blended), on holiday, doing camps...

I also recommend membership for the National Trust . It has saved my sanity on many a day. Bring your own food and drinks and a fabulous day awaits!

@Tessasanderson - I wasn’t complaining? I was agreeing with op that yes even free activities like the Park can cost money with things like parking, ice creams etc over the weeks.
For us the parking fees aren’t an issue, but I can see how for many they would be