Do you agree with me or DP on this?

[Partylapaa]

DD’s birthday is second week of November. She’s going to be five so is fully aware of Santa and Christmas. We’ve been looking at venues for a party and the place we have decided on has availability the week before her birthday or the second week of October. I feel strongly that the October date is better as by mid November the venue will be very Christmassy with Christmas songs etc which I think takes away from her birthday celebration. DP thinks I’m being ridiculous but I know that he also wants the November date as he has a golf day that he wants to do the day before the October date and I highly suspect he wants to protect this weekend so he can have his hangover in peace the next day.

AIBU or do you understand where I’m coming from?!

Edited to add we will do a family celebration in November on her birthday

November. October is too early and Christmas stuff will be nice and her birthday will be Christmas flavoured forever so it doesn't really matter

My DS was born 15th December. It’s never stopped us organising his birthday celebrations for his actual birthday.

October is ridiculously early. YABU.

I don't really see the issue with possibly having Christmas decorations at the venue and don't think this will take away from it being a birthday party in any way. My birthday is in December and this isn't something I've ever really thought about.

Madness. How do you think december born people cope. Just embrace it

November. You can’t really just make up a different birthday in the wrong month. It’ll mean more to her having her party near her actual birthday and your reasons are not ones she’s going to care about

November. My daughter’s birthday is in December and it’s never ever been an issue.
Christmassy stuff fact added to the magic at that age and November is hardly close enough to Christmas to be such a big deal.

DS went to a party on the 19th of December last year.

November date, the October date is too early to celebrate her birthday.
I have a DD with a mid November birthday and whilst I understand wanting to keep it separate I can't say its ever caused us any issues.

Btw my dd is dec 27th. We have the party on the 27th as that’s her birthday

Also vote for November. Closer to her birthday. What kind of venue is it that it will matter what music is played? Will the children actually be listening to it?
I also think that fact that your husband has plans that were already agreed in Oct should be something you consider.

Either is fine. When we lived in the ME, DS had his party in June as July was Ramadan and/or school holidays.

Definitely November

Also so what if your dp wants a hangover day in peace, who wouldn't? Are you a team or not?
Unless he has a problem with alcohol and it's a weekly occurrence, it shouldn't be a factor in deciding the birthday party date.

Another vote for November. Seems strange to have a party a month before her birthday

November. My birthday is November and as child i would not have understood a birthday party in October. Surely you can ask the venue to not play Christmas music for your childs party and it will save you having to decorate except for a maybe a birthday banner.

November 😊

Well you didn’t really give any reasons specifically - just “the place we decided upon”.

Why pick a venue that doesn’t have any suitable availability? Seems daft to me, that’s all.

Mind you my DD had a December birthday and I just booked whatever had availability as close to her birthday as possible 🤷🏼‍♀️

As someone who's birthday is a week before Christmas it has never bothered me having Christmas decorations up around my birthday. In fact it wouldn't be my birthday without it. October is far too early to celebrate her November birthday.

November date

FWIW my DS has a Nov birthdate similar to your DD and we never ended up with a venue decorated for Christmas , but if they had been he wouldn’t have minded

October is too early

If your daughter's birthday is in the 2nd week of Nov and the venue is available a week before that, not sure how it is mid- Nov? In any case, Nov makes most sense, not Oct! Won't you have any say in the choice of music? Surely the DJ won't play Christmas songs for the entire duration of a kid's party? Also, it seems you have something against your husband's golfing plan, because again, don't see a problem with why he can't go in Oct and have the party in Nov.

October is too early. Have it in November closer to her birthday

My DD is a mid Dec bday which is a logistical, and expensive nightmare 🤣

We have always done an early party - mainly to avoid busy family diaries that would mean her friends wouldn’t be free to attend so close to Xmas.

we usually do it 2 weeks early, at the end of November and have never found Christmassy or in any way detracting from her birthday, and to be honest - even if it were Christmassy I don’t think kids would give a crap anyway!

November. The October date is too early as at that age a month or so is ages and it just won’t feel connected! I’m not saying you couldn’t do a party early or delay it with good reason of course, but I don’t think there’s good reason here.

You want to have a party 4 weeks before her birthday? That’s bonkers imho

Remember time goes muchh slower for a child. It needs to be near the actual date to have a birthday impact.