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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to get sick of DH strop

84 replies

Fizzyrosie · 22/08/2026 06:45

Currently sat in a cramped roof of a campervan questioning AIBU. DH and Dd completed a long distance walk yesterday which is amazing! So proud of them. Was so pleased when they'd finished and had booked a meal at the "official" hotel at the finish but I managed to get the time of the booking wrong so we turned up at 6.30pm not 6pm so they couldn't fit us in.

After a long stint in the campervan there was half a bag of pasta and a few cereal bars left. DH was soooooo annoyed and went in an uncooperative, uncommunicative strop worthy of the moodiest teen. After much stressing I managed to get into us into an Indian place in the next town. I know I haven't walked the whole way. But they've had this amazing experience together. And I've been their sherpa. Sorting brekkie, a pack up and tea everyday., finding campervan places, packing and unpacking the fecking van, doing the washing / tidying up and driving the damn thing around the tiny roads to the next meet up place. I stink as been wearing the same clothes all week. Had to make an emergency trip to Sainsbury's for clean knickers. Spending 6 hours a day on my own trying to find something interesting to do en route that doesn't cost too much with a dog. I've seen more ruins than I know what to do with. Sat in homely little cafes nursing a coffee whilst people come and go with their loved ones. I know some people like being on their own and would find it quite nice but it's been a rubbish holiday for me as I end up feeling like I'm going doolally if I spend too much time on my own. I ended up taking to the dog and Jeremy vine. Even considered ringing in one day. And then to have the last night effectively ruined. Yes I did get the wrong time for the booking but it's one little mistake as I'd read the spreadsheet we have for all booking wrong on my phone. So AIBU to feel aggrieved by his moody strop?

OP posts:
category12 · 23/08/2026 11:00

DearDenimEagle · 23/08/2026 10:38

Do you know where it was? Because some treks are in fairly remote places with not a lot to do on the way except walks and looking at scenery. West Highland Way used to be like that. Not sure now but Apart from Tyndrum and Kinlochleven, there was a lot of nothing but a few small hotels in between ..nothing being stunning scenery but no beach or spa, pottery workshops etc

I was responding to the person saying OP should have done spa days, not suggesting them. 😀

Them in bold, me not in bold.

Take it up with the person I quoted. 😂

Hanksness · 23/08/2026 11:06

You are a people pleaser and he feels very comfortable using you as his emotional punching bag clearly.

Your daughter is watching this.
Is this the future you want for her?

She is highly likely to end up with a selfish spoiled arse, just like your husband.

You cannot change him, but you can change you, and take responsibility for your people pleasing that is giving him the clear message that he can treat you like this.

You are behaving as is you have neither self esteem nor self respect.

This is not good for your daughter to witness.

Have a good long think about how you allow yourself to be treated and stop it.

Bending yourself out of shape for a selfish spoiled man child is utterly thankless, as last night showed you.

You deserve better.

Ponoka7 · 23/08/2026 11:15

I'm failing to see what's been so hard about your sit off in a camper van, with a occasional dog walk, that you couldn't double check the time and put it in your phone. If this was the other way round, Mum and DD walk, you'd be getting told that he wanted to burst your bubble etc. Describing yourself as a sherpa is ridiculous. You have a camper van, so what's it's like to holiday in one, can't have come as a surprise.

category12 · 23/08/2026 11:48

Ponoka7 · 23/08/2026 11:15

I'm failing to see what's been so hard about your sit off in a camper van, with a occasional dog walk, that you couldn't double check the time and put it in your phone. If this was the other way round, Mum and DD walk, you'd be getting told that he wanted to burst your bubble etc. Describing yourself as a sherpa is ridiculous. You have a camper van, so what's it's like to holiday in one, can't have come as a surprise.

Oh come off it, it's like she's been on a campervan trip on her own, except she's been picking up after her dh and dd and doing all the donkey work to enable their trek, and no choice of destination. It's not exactly a relaxing holiday.

Ponoka7 · 23/08/2026 14:58

category12 · 23/08/2026 11:48

Oh come off it, it's like she's been on a campervan trip on her own, except she's been picking up after her dh and dd and doing all the donkey work to enable their trek, and no choice of destination. It's not exactly a relaxing holiday.

That was the plan, they were going hiking. They own a camper van and have a dog, none of this would have come as a surprise. If the OP isn't enjoying that type of holiday anymore, she can say that she doesn't want to go, next time.

PippaDee123 · 23/08/2026 15:51

It’s like MN bingo on these threads to see how quickly someone says ‘cut some slack’. Honestly, other expressions are available

lazyarse123 · 23/08/2026 15:55

HumphreyCobblers · 22/08/2026 07:06

Gosh after all your support this week he sulks at you for one mistake? He is out of order. I would not be doing this for him ever again. Sulking like this is a most unattractive trait, I was a bit like this as a teen until i realised that only arses behave like this. He has no excuse and should have appreciated your efforts .

I agree with this. Ungrateful twat.

category12 · 23/08/2026 16:00

Ponoka7 · 23/08/2026 14:58

That was the plan, they were going hiking. They own a camper van and have a dog, none of this would have come as a surprise. If the OP isn't enjoying that type of holiday anymore, she can say that she doesn't want to go, next time.

What are you talking about? It's not a case of her not enjoying "that type of holiday" anymore, it was a specific trip to allow dh and dd to do a particular long distance walk like Lands End to John O Groats or similar.

She was acting as their support crew so they didn't have to carry all their shit with them. It wasn't like a normal camping holiday at all. 🙄

Fizzyrosie · 23/08/2026 16:27

Ok. So we hired the campervan so we don't own one. But yes I did know what I was getting myself in for. And it was generally fine and what I expected. But it was just the behaviour on the last night when he was such a sulk that upset me.

This was a major challenge for 13 year old to do, averaging around 20 miles a day for 15 days. I wanted to do it to be there for her and provide a more comfortable experience than camping and hostels. And to make sure that if she couldn't manage it then there was an easy escape. He apologised and we've moved on. I do need to ensure he knows it's not ok to behave like that and to appreciate me more.

It has been wonderful to see her complete it.

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