To think joining the Freemasons could maybe be beneficial for some young men?

[Jane379]

I've been thinking recently about the decline in mental health and friendships among young men on average and it occurred to me that third spaces have decreased, especially in some areas, but one that does remain, and has a long and apparently successful history, is the Freemasons.
I don't know much about them but I read an article in a history magazine recently which argued they're often seen in terms of secret networks etc but are generally beneficial and promote male friendship, mentoring, charity work and decrease polarisation through taking politics and religion off the table. If this is true, it sounds positive and potentially beneficial.

AIBU?

Really do you think belonging to a secret society, that actively recruits policemen, council officials, property developers and the like is a good thing. They may be above board now, but their past history has the stench of corruption about it.

Construction/engineering/architecture/transport/etc. I’ve also heard about it in finance from friends.

I have had a wonderful career in this industry, but now in my middle life as I’m climbing up the corporate ladder I have noticed it a lot more. It’s funny, in my first ever job I witnessed the ‘handshake’ between the client and a contractor and thought it was all a bit silly, the client even pointed it out after the meeting, I think to make sure I noticed. He was a complete creep to be fair! You’d think in this day and age, and the steps that have been made in these industries to positively include people, it would be stamped out more, but sadly not.

More female focussed women’s groups are forming to combat this, along with other groups whose faces don’t fit the norm. It would be nice if we could all just embrace diversity without having to form factions, but I’m not sure how else it can be addressed otherwise.

Not exactly a god, a “grand architect of the universe “. I am a female Master Freemason and believe in both a god and a goddess. Dual aspects and that is all fine.

Yes and no. My dad is a mason and is more “culturally Christian” than a true believer.

Round Table is a bit less cult like 😀

The one near me has a sign outside the lodge asking if people want to join. I was shocked. My H was one for many years and he had to be invited. LONG time ago.

yes but not necessarily God as we think of it.
My H was one for years. He is Jewish and there were lots of different religions in his Lodge (London). I never saw any of the negatives people are describing tbh but it was definitely different years ago and I don’t doubt there was corruption as in any large organisation.

This is interesting.
I only know one bloke who is in the Freemasons and he is both Catholic and a wanker!

Yes, I over simplified it, I know it’s a supreme being. I don’t believe in one, god or cat!

Please can everyone stop quoting me. I don’t think it needs any further info. Lol

Eh? They have lodges for different professions. He was in a lodge that you could only get into if you were a police officer or a member of the armed forces.

And the point is that while there are different lodges, they are all Freemasons. So if someone from one lodge meets someone from another lodge they can recognise each other as Freemasons.

So... That being the case why do you think police officers were originally encouraged to join, and even special lodges only for police officers created? It's either about internal career advancement or it's about different professions scratching each others backs. Either way, not altruistic and he wasn't invited to join for altruisc.reasons.

That sounds like a cut and paste from their website

You could also say they are a sexist, racist, homophobic secret society who exist for the benefit of their mainly elderly and Conservative-supporting members

Do you think I don’t know that? Would have been great if he’d stayed a police officer, stayed in the masons and it helped him out. I have no issues with that.

My son joined because he thought it was some super shady, secret club that would be interesting.

It was just old men talking about politics and he got bored and left after 18 months. It wasn’t as fun as he thought.

It's not selective. My son joined after reading about it during lockdown and making enquiries direct to the local lodge. He did have to say he believes in a higher being. I was gobsmacked. He is mixed race and was on the minimum wage at the time. I was a bit worried because of all the rumours and gossip but it's been brilliant for him. The only downside is there are not enough young people, in his lodge anyway.

My son found the same at his lodge. He said he was the youngest by 30 years.

It's not shady in the sense of super shady government conspiracy theories secretly controlling the worlds government
It is shady in terms of policemen are recruited because they bring advantages in that, if another Freemason is caught speeding your son would let them of. Or, more seriously, it could mean if a fellow Freemason is accused of assaulting his wife or sleeping with a 15 year old your son might help the nasty business go away if he was case officer. In exchange, the police officer members might get help with career advancement or with planning permission for their extension. It's extending the solidarity some police officers already have for each other.

Obviously that doesn't mean your son is corrupt like that or that he would turn a blind eye to DV for the sake of perks. But they didn't "take him under their wing" because they are inclusive people. It's because he gave them the impression (likely accidentally) he might be that type of person. That's what they meant by "made a good impression".

They pray to a higher supreme being. It is very expensive for the ladies as well. lots of do's and evening wear occasions.

Raffle tickets are usually £5 each rather than 5 for £1😂

This. Although we also work on ourselves. From a rough ashlar (stone) to a smooth one. I am a female Freemason.

Jesus, why are you telling me stuff I already know?

He left the police after three years due to two tier policing and all the corruption. He knows. I KNOW.

I mean took him under his wing as a way of getting him in. His lodge were quite strict that you already had to know someone inside. He didn’t. We don’t live in the area where he was a police officer, it was a different county, there weren’t any of his colleagues in that lodge.

They wanted young blood and for the area we live in (we are not from here), ds is incredibly well spoken and a lot of the old guys wanted him in as he impressed them. He just didn’t want it in the end as he couldn’t be arsed with all the dinners.

They like you to believe in a higher power but it doesn't have to be a Christian God. Some of the lines for ceremonies do include God but that is just symbolic and tradition. I am very in favour of freemasonry, my husband has been one for years and i understand where you are coming from in it being beneficial for mental health. The only problem you may come across for young men is the age and cost. You have to be over 21 unless your father is a member in which case you can join at 18 and it is fairly expensive; lodge fees, dining, charity. It is first and foremost a charitable organisation and you are expected to contribute.

The Freemasons donate approx £1 million per week through the various lodges to charity . For the member it is as good as the individuals in any given lodge, so just like any other club.
Numbers are declining so now it is definitely not by invitation only. I know this as my uncle is a Grand Master of a few local lodges. I would also say they members help each other greatly during times of distress.

My nana who was a successful businessman was married in her mid 30s to her third husband who had a double barrelled surname and was upper class (fan maker family in Regent’s Street in 1900s, family had Nannies, boarding school and so on) well his family had most of the money to start their business, she had some from a later inheritance but he and his family had way more that they either invested or didn’t within the greater family. Anyway, she was the brains of her successful business. He financed it all or mostly after WWII when it started. When she wanted to expand later on, he refused to finance it. She ran charity Police Balls at Battersea Town Hall for many years in 50s/60s.

She wasn’t allowed to join the Freemasons but he (her husband) was. She wasn’t really bitter, he just went off to the meetings and events. They lived separate lives in 2 adjoining separate houses with new partners but weren’t divorced until she was 70 when they wound down their business and sold both houses and moved away from each other.

He lived 2-3 years with his new partner, then he suddenly died in early 70s but he was unwell (heart attack) and after he died, she was given by his partner about 4 pairs of white or cream or yellow soft gloves that were apparently Freemason’s gloves (I saw them as a teenager) he’d worn to meetings and events and she gave them to my mum who binned them! He never told anyone a word about his activities there at Freemasons. He was a decorated WW2 rear gunner awarded the DFC, again, never talked about that either. But he used to be very amusing and liked am dram. God he sounds awful! He really wasn’t.

Re their charitable deeds, never heard of any of that with my family, but Police balls/dances were the ones my nana organised. On now googling these apparently the police and Freemasons helped organise them (I had no idea!) so apparently they were charitable. At Battersea Town Hall.

My nana by the way wasn’t a church goer and neither was her husband! She’d been divorced twice and had 2 daughters about 10 years apart in age, one from each marriage. Both were christened though in church as children. They married in a registry office during or just after WWII.

This is sad. All the masons i have met through my husbands two lodges and his side order are lovely. We don't have specific 'ladies nights' at my husbands lodges but ladies are invited to Christmas, Valentines day and the summer socials.
The MCF bought me a mobilty scooter and also issued us with a hardship grant when I had to stop working and my husband went part time to be my carer. My husband helped out with redecorating at an elderly members house and I spoke to a widow who said the masons take her out for dinner every month since her husband died. They certainly take care of their own but charity in their primary focus.

I had the misfortune to have a mason for a father. I saw it going on.

I am involved in local politics for a different party. I have seen it in action and my community is living with the consequences of it.

I know more than enough, thank you.