To not want to spend my staycation watching tv

[Thosecandlesdontmatch]

All the family is off for three weeks together. It’s the most we’ve ever been off. We are going away for a couple of nights an hour away at the end of the holiday.
We live in a tourist area with lots to do.
We’ve had some mornings at the beach and at some attractions, but we seem to be having lots of days just at home.
Dh goes on his computer and Dc play or watch tv, but I feel that we’re wasting our time together and it wasn’t how I imagined it.
I would love to at least go out every morning, maybe relax in the afternoon, then some nights out locally or back to the beach.
Dh seems happy and says he just wants to relax

Would you be happy with having whole days inside?

I would just take myself and do what I wanted

I would be disappointed that DH (and the children depending on age) hadn't been proactive in deciding what to do/organising things to do. I like staycations a lot!

Having said that, if they don't, they don't. Nothing worse than 'forced fun' so I would take myself off. I appreciate though, that I am single and very used to being alone, and was I part of a family I may not feel comfortable with that.

i would defiantly not be happy spending the majority of the time indoors - worse again watching TV, you do whatever it is you envisiaged, inform the family of your plan and some may join you. Don't waste hoildays indoors to suit the others...do your own thing....

I think there needs to be a balance.
Couple of days a week where you do ‘activities’ and still have time to chill?

Yes, I'm quite happy to have days at home - reading, pottering in the garden, cooking, doing a bit of yoga...it's peaceful ☺️ if you want to go out, you should go but there's no point in trying to force the others if they're happy doing their own thing.

I wouldn't want to stay in all day, and I'd take myself out, but depending on the age of the children, some sporadic days like this is fine. If they're older, going out in the afternoon might suit better.

3 weeks is a long time, you can't expect the same amount of activity as a week's holiday.

Make your own plans and say "I'm doing this, does anyone want to join me?"

I need to do more than my family, so just do my own thing. They need more vegetating time at home than I do.

In that case, you need to be proactive and rally the troops. I may like the odd day at home but not every day. Start organising trips out. Maybe get each child to choose one place they’d like to go. Also, if dh at home with the kids, have a couple of trips out just by yourself.

I am happy to stay home and potter but then when I look back on it I wish I'd done a bit more. Holidays are usually about making memories and to do that you need to do something a bit different.

You've asked and they say they're happy, which means you can't expect them to be coming up with ideas. So either you go off and do your own thing or you come up with ideas you think people will enjoy and put it to them.

I love full days at home. That could be because I’m constantly travelling with work so I really value and enjoy several days in a row at home… But I also don’t feel like they’re boring at all. I can entertain myself for a full day by doing little jobs, watching lots of TV and catching up on my favourite sports, reading, gardening.

There is real value in feeling like you can just do nothing all day, and it being ok. Assuming you’re a productive human being outside of those days!

It's not really family time if your DH has got his nose stuck in his computer is it. And quite frankly I wouldn't personally want to take myself out on my own, not without the kids anyway because what's the point of a family holiday otherwise. The odd day at home is fine and it's good to just chill sometimes but it seems a shame to waste the good weather just mooching around. So basically yes, I agree with you!

I'd struggle to want to go out every day for the best part of three weeks in my home location. I would consider lolling about at home for entire day a good use of some of a staycation.

Get them to make some plans for some days. Then you've got things to look forward to, and won't feel so bad on the lazy days leading up to days out.

How old are DC? I would not be happy with that no, but everyone has different expectations of time off, not fair for either side to force their idea of fun onto others.

If DC are young then its fine to insist on time out if the house - its our job as parents to get them away from screens and trying new things. If they are older teens then not so much, you kind of have to meet them where they are.

There must be a compromise? Do your own thing? Take turns choosing a morning activity (be prepared to do some gaming/movie watching though. Or combine activities ie if they into gaming go to a local swap event and then have a walk/lunch while you are out? Go to the beach together for a picnic but let them go to the arcade while you have a walk?

I’d love it tbh. I love being at home

Now and again I take myself off to the nearest city, look around the older shops, buy some lunch, go and (weather permitting) get a couple of glasses of wine in a nice pub garden with my book, then home.

But as I've said earlier I am single and this is my 'thing' if I have a random day off. In the OP's situation I would be disappointed. I wonder how much discussion took place before this 'staycation' occurred?

DH and I are currently off work (no children) and we're doing a mixture but that does include days at home where we have a lie-in, watch TV, potter in the garden and just relax - I'd be pretty annoyed if I was expected to get up, dressed and out every single day of my time off.

Saying that, what's stopping you from going out on your own or from asking the DC if they fancy the beach or a trip out for ice-cream/cake?

I think it's good to have a mix of being at home and then going out and doing activities. I'd be broke if we did activities every day! DH and I don't usually have much time off at home together because it feels like a bit of a waste of leave (DC are primary age so it's a juggle covering the holidays) but if we, we'll usually tag team minding the DC so we can get jobs done round the house, go the gym etc.

Can you have a family meeting and plan a few days out? Can you take a solo day and do something lovely for you?

I agree with you but, unfortunately, it means you will have to be the instigator. I would also do some advance planning - check weather the night before, ensure you have picnic supplies and bags packed so you can get out in the morning quickly and everyone knows that’s the plan. You could also see if the kids would like some one-on-one time with you - mine love this and then they can plan their day solely around them. There may be things they are more into - zip lines, paddle boarding, tree top adventures etc. Mine have to be bribed with cake and ice cream to get them to a National Trust place

Yes it’s this!

I have two teens. We’ve done something big every 2-3 days (York, London, water park, escape room). Days out on other days may be going to Aldi! We bought a couple of new board games (Seven Wonders was a big hit, eldritch horror took a little too long for us) and binged game of thrones together. It’s been lovely.

I think it depends on how old the kids are but yes I’d feel the same as you. It’s good to relax but that’s not really family time, especially in different rooms. I feel that watching TV and going on the computer is what you do to relax after you’ve actually done something. I sometimes think I won’t be on my death bed thinking “I really wish I’d spent more time watching TV”, I’ll probably be thinking “I really wish I’d spent more time with my family” or “I wish I’d had more experiences” or something similar

We live in a tourist area with lots to do.

I'm with you in that I'd be out first thing most mornings, and wanting to do things together but I expect as you live in a tourist area your family see it as "been there done that".
Its their home town/village so probably a bit different than going away for a holiday where it's all things new and time limited in packing everything in they may want to do/see

I'd leave them to it and go out and enjoy some peace and quiet time, doing as I please for an hour or two.

Did you talk about what a three week "staycation" would look like before you both booked the time off?

How old are the children? It would vary wildly depending on if they were 5 or 15!

I agree with you but tbh it was probably inevitable. That's why people go away for their holiday.