Need some advice about my 15yo son and a sudden opportunity

[sooof]

I honestly don't know what to do here and would really appreciate some outside opinions.

My son is 15 and about a month ago he applied for a film studio course. It's a 6 week programme that teaches filmmaking and also includes visits to studios. He would have to stay there for the full 6 weeks.

Honestly he applied without really thinking he would get in. It's a very prestigious programme with very limited places and it's something he's genuinely interested in. Yesterday we got the confirmation email and an official letter saying he was accepted so it's definitely happening.

He is absolutely thrilled. I don't think there is any way I could tell him no after seeing how excited he is about it. So realistically either my husband or I will have to go with him.

The problem is the timing is terrible.

We're from Madrid and currently we're away on a trip. I also have two other children who are 13 and 10. My youngest is particularly dependent on me and has never been away from me for anything close to six weeks.

I also went back to work in September and already have some important clients and commitments. If I decided to go with my son I could technically rearrange things, but it wouldn't be easy. I would have to move two important client commitments by about six weeks and there is also a summit at the end of next month that I am expected to attend.

My husband has a lot going on at work too and has a small work trip at the end of September, so it's not as simple as just saying he'll stay home with the other two.

We have about two weeks before my son has to start on September 1st so we have some time to figure out the logistics, but suddenly we're trying to reorganise work, childcare, school, travel and everything else around something we never expected to actually happen.

And honestly I'm torn.

On one hand this is a huge opportunity for my son and something he is genuinely passionate about. I don't want him to miss it because the timing is inconvenient for the rest of us.

On the other hand, leaving my younger two for six weeks feels like a huge thing too, especially my youngest. I also have responsibilities at work that can't just disappear

You will not be able to work in LA without the correct visa. Bringing a work laptop on a tourist visa and you could be stopped by ICE.

OP, it all sounds odd. Courses like this which cater for students from all over the world offer residential places or at least recommendations of places to stay and chaperones.
I am sure your head is spinning with all that has been said on here and that you’re now fully researching the course.
Best of luck and I hope all is legitimate for your son’s sake.

So he’s doing this instead of year 11? Seems odd.

I hope you have meticulously looked into this. If it was legit and a real opportunity (as opposed to, at best, just a money spinner) I would expect accommodation and details of the care package etc for minors. It's clearly not done through a school etc and might be decidedly dodgy. A 6 week programme during term time not arranged through a recognised organisation sounds very dodgy. Do they even know he's a minor - for example if the "application" is more of a guaranteed registration then they might not even look at the details and all other attendees could be adults. If there is any doubt about this (and I would suggest there should be!!) perhaps speak to his school and at least see if their safeguarding lead can help with enquires. I would be giving it a massive berth.

This is difficult, OP, because your son is so excited - but I’ll be honest, I work in the film industry and no residential programme is providing a genuinely ‘huge opportunity’ at 15.

It might be interesting/informative/fun - but this isn’t an opportunity that is going to make a difference in real terms. At best, it would be an experience and he might make some friends and a few connections. At worst, you’ve spunked a lot of money and disrupted your family life.

Honestly, even the enormously competitive film school courses for undergraduates and beyond can be a little questionable tbh. I’ve known people go to the most acclaimed film schools for degrees who got nowhere in the industry upon graduating. I’ve also known those who never did any filmmaking courses to speak of who had amazingly successful careers.

If you can spare the money and make it work to go with your son for 6 weeks, there’s no harm in it - but I think important to see it for what it is!

They are not in the UK

You are not allowed to do work of any kind on an Esta.

And I am sorry, I am a bit sceptical about a ‘prestigious’ 6 week course running from September? For a candidate at his age? No, there are summer school programmes running in July/August at UCLA and other well respected schools - open to anyone who books and pays the fee, no screening process.

I think you are being scammed.

If it is a well known and bonafide course/provider - you need to post the link to it here.

I am absolutely certain there are no courses geared at 15-18yo of this type running from Sept 1st (a Tuesday?) for 6 weeks when kids that age are usually required by law to be in school in pretty much every country in the world. A ‘prestigious’ school such as UCLA, or the NYFA will not require students to be absent from mainstream school - these two run 2-6 week summer courses and NYFA runs 12 week weekend courses.

Unless you can link us to the course provider?

This whole thing is very odd. A quick Google search suggests that these courses usually run during (US) summer holidays - ie late June to early-mid Aug. schools in the US start early- mid Aug so teens have to go back to school, not do a course. And there are quite a few good programs. Can he delay by a year?

@sooof Please post a link to the course so we can better advise. It looks very much as though you are being scammed and risk expensive travel to the US with nothing at the end of it, along with jeopardising you child’s regular education at a crucial point.

What was the ‘highly selective’ process for being offered a place?

Youve evaded both these questions from other posters. I hope this means you’ve realised you’re being scammed.

Can you link to the course please? this is giving red flags all over the place. A bit of a license to print money by making kids think that they’re going to learn how to make a movie in LA for six weeks, so yes, the course is important so we can all advise whether it’s going to be worth it. At 15 he’ll think it’s the best thing in the world, I remember getting an agent at 17, that I had to pay for… 🫠🫠🫠🫠

Can’t you and DH split the time? You go for 3 weeks, he goes for the other?

Just to add, I really do think you should post the links. My DC went to a private school with the children of lots of A listers from the film and TV industry - BFF’s dad was a BAFTA winning film director so it was normal to see him chatting with Al Pacino via Zoom on the kitchen counter. My DD wanted to enter the industry (still does) so am familiar with most of the courses from film making to 2d/3d animation studio courses etc.

Just link the ‘school’/course provider so we can check.

You think the BBC will pick up this thread about a child wanting to go and study a six week course and something that lots of kids want to do. You literally think a journalist will think that this is a story worth running, and then somebody will want to sponsor the child, he was already clearly from a wealthy enough background that this is even something that can be considered… Mumsnet posters really do live in Cloudcuckooland.

It’s LA not NY.

So, there are no 6wk courses for 15-18yo in LA either? Not at any of the reputable providers.

Sounds dodgy to me.
Do you have to pay for this course?
How do you know that anybody can’t get on it?
Needs more investigation.

@sooof if you are UK [or Europe] based - the BFI course is excellent. They even do a dress-up/showcase event at the end of the summer to give a premier/awards experience to show the work the different cohorts have produced.

https://www.bfi.org.uk/bfi-film-academy-opportunities-young-people

The idea that this is run in term time is the biggest red flag!

Grok says that NYFA in LA has no 6-week teen courses starting in September. They are June-Aug summer camps and only weekend programmes in term time.

As the six-week course is $7k this would be a money-spinner scam. The fact he was accepted so quickly does seem to point to a scam, and if it’s real, it means it’s not exclusive at all!

No 15yo should be shunning education for this.

This also sounds really odd to me. Make sure you speak to other people that have been on the course and are planning to attend.

If it’s definitely genuine, or you’re prepared to take the chance, I would split it as others have suggested. On your stint be very very careful though as if you’re going on a tourist visa (or would your son be getting a student visa) to the US I don’t think you can work. The IRS are really big on this and you could end up in quite a bit of trouble.

Sorry haven't had time to read all the thread. Call my cynical but I'm suspecting a scam.
Please check all details,...Google the course provider to death if you have to.
Sounds like a lot of money involved.

I would not be that excited. Sounds way too easy.

This is really good advice. Sadly I suspect the OP is going to ignore all the warnings.
We all love to think our children are amazing, brilliant etc. But at 15 he and his mother sound gullible.

It's going to be hard to get her to understand she is taking a huge gamble here.

OK so here we go:
5 pages of replies, the majority warning caution.
OP seems determined to not listen to advice and is quite defensive.
OP has not realised her son is interested in the most competitive industry in existence.
OP has convinced herself that her son is super special, and deserves this at any cost.
OP is not going to listen to advice.
MUMSNET are wasting our time even though collective we have hundreds of years of experience.
OP is prepared to risk her child's schooling and loads of money to indulge him.
OP has more money than sense.
OP needs a wake up call.

End of.

Haven't read everything, so I'm sure this is somewhere in here but this is very strange. In my younger days US programmes like Camp America, Power Poms and the like were very popular in Europe. This was pre 9/11 but the arrangements and vetting and visas took FOREVER and everything was set up months in advance. The younger kids on the programmes that were educational stayed with host families and often hosted a family member in return later. The families applied through the programmes and were vetted. The camp/cheerleading/sports etc involved accommodation that was supervised by adults. Is anything 100% safe? No, of course not. But there is accountability. An international programme that intakes without interview or portfolio, gives you a 6-8 week window to arrange travel, visa, childcare, accommodation and everything you will need while you are there sounds like either fake or some sort of sub standard unreliable operation. Have you paid them any money? You need to really investigate this. Especially the performers and directors they are saying they are associated with.
Quentin Tarrantino got famous while he worked at a blockbuster video and Harrison Ford was working as a carpenter and jobbing extra on film sets when George Lucas cast him. How much opportunity will this course actually provide him?
Wouldn't you be better investing the money in really good quality equipment and supporting your son to produce a portfolio, get his work out there via social media and streaming platforms and look into behind the scenes careers with television networks and production companies to work his way into the industry?