Need some advice about my 15yo son and a sudden opportunity

[sooof]

I honestly don't know what to do here and would really appreciate some outside opinions.

My son is 15 and about a month ago he applied for a film studio course. It's a 6 week programme that teaches filmmaking and also includes visits to studios. He would have to stay there for the full 6 weeks.

Honestly he applied without really thinking he would get in. It's a very prestigious programme with very limited places and it's something he's genuinely interested in. Yesterday we got the confirmation email and an official letter saying he was accepted so it's definitely happening.

He is absolutely thrilled. I don't think there is any way I could tell him no after seeing how excited he is about it. So realistically either my husband or I will have to go with him.

The problem is the timing is terrible.

We're from Madrid and currently we're away on a trip. I also have two other children who are 13 and 10. My youngest is particularly dependent on me and has never been away from me for anything close to six weeks.

I also went back to work in September and already have some important clients and commitments. If I decided to go with my son I could technically rearrange things, but it wouldn't be easy. I would have to move two important client commitments by about six weeks and there is also a summit at the end of next month that I am expected to attend.

My husband has a lot going on at work too and has a small work trip at the end of September, so it's not as simple as just saying he'll stay home with the other two.

We have about two weeks before my son has to start on September 1st so we have some time to figure out the logistics, but suddenly we're trying to reorganise work, childcare, school, travel and everything else around something we never expected to actually happen.

And honestly I'm torn.

On one hand this is a huge opportunity for my son and something he is genuinely passionate about. I don't want him to miss it because the timing is inconvenient for the rest of us.

On the other hand, leaving my younger two for six weeks feels like a huge thing too, especially my youngest. I also have responsibilities at work that can't just disappear

This is weird

• 6 week course requiring parents to drop all and go. Few adults can just take 6 weeks off work and other responsibilities at one time.
• Run in school time for school age children in their year leading up to their exams. I expect your son wouldn't be allowed to miss school for it and nor would any other kids.
• Being available mid August for September

Either it's a scam, or it's likely for older kids. Sounds like might be something aimed at 18 year olds when they have finished A-levels and don't start uni till October because 6 weeks from 1st Sept would just about fit with Uni starts in October. I suspect they are recruiting for next September too.

He either goes on his own — or, if for whatever reason that's impossible, he doesn't go. The parents whose jobs pay for his life can't just take six weeks off to accompany him on an opportunity - that's life. They can't leave their other kids so he can do a nice thing. In my family, there were lots of occasions when my parents (who were very supportive of our hobbies and interests said, 'No, you can't do that', because it meant a family sacrifice that wasn't proportionate. For example, my sibling got a part in a BBC tv programme, and my mother said 'no' because doing it would have meant the whole summer and autumn had a schedule dictated by the show, and that we would have had to cancel trips and holidays that were expensive and exciting. That sibling is now an actor so the disappointment over that one job has not really impacted their life at large.

This doesn’t fit in summer camp times. They do other 6 week courses but I’m sure they’re for over 18s, and in term times.

If he applied with your consent then you need to help make it happen
If he applied without your consent then yes factor in the rest of the families needs

And, as others have said, do check it is definitely legitimate and not just a money making wheeze

Scam OP...

If it is really such a great opportunity then youll have to make it work. Odd you didnt consider this when he applied TBH.

Are you sure about this OP, have you had testimonials from people you trust or is this based on publicity from the school?

I'm sure!! You can trust on me this..... regarding it's window, actually myself wanted write that in post

How about hiring him a British or Irish chaperone? The colleges won't go back until October and a serious minded student of around 20 years old would be fine. Free holiday in Los Angeles, shouldn't cost too much for the student.

It seems DS got a place very quickly and easily this year, so why not promise him he can reapply as soon as he's old enough to go on his own, or plan it for a time you can stay with him, or even ask the college to defer his place?
This seems very rushed for such a big commitment, and what about his schooling? It's a lot of time to take out coming up to GCSE's.

Hmmm. I did 20 years in the film and TV industry. I'd want to check that this course is proper, feel free to send a link. Dunno, something doesn't feel right.

https://www.nyfa.edu/location/summer-camps-and-workshops-in-los-angeles/ Accommodation, counsellors, not just hello 15 year old see you here.

I’ve heard of things like this before. How much did you have to pay for the course?

Some people have said to send the child (15) on their own. Would that be 'allowed' from Spain?
Getting past US border control would need a notarised parent letter.

In the US hotels won't allow minors to book a hotel room (requires ID and a matching credit card), so where would they stay?
I would let my 15 year old do this as long as they were going to a summer school type arrangement, and ideally met at the airport (although I'd allow a rank cab to a legit location - all checked beforehand on google maps)

Someone said they wouldn't travel to the US if they were Spanish speaking because of ICE. In southern states it often feels like the majority are Spanish speakers, so they wouldn't stand out! Plus if you are there legally then you don't really have too much to worry about.

Which is the last point: Do check the specifics but I expect such a short course would be covered by the ETSA (probably up to 90 days).

If it isn't you'd need to factor in the time to obtain a Visa, which includes a trip to the US embassy for an interview.

So was it discussed at all before he applied?

If not then I wouldn't be entertaining it tbh.

This sounds very iffy to me. Is the “course” itself costing a small fortune? Have you done your due diligence and researched the company on line? Not just their website with no doubt glowing testimonials - eg search “company name”complaints or scam or fraud etc.

What did he have to do to get selected?

So he just got the place and he’s starting on September 1st? It’s all a bit rushed. Surely they can give you information about accommodation. My uncle is a Hollywood film producer and if we ever go there half the houses seem to be empty because so many people who live there aren’t there most of the time. In fact, my niece has spent the whole summer in LA at someone’s house who was looking for a house sitter to look after their succulents.

Any prestigious college will have connections. They can’t run programs that are difficult to get in to just for children within driving distance.

Would his school even allow this?

I’d be really concerned about this opportunity.

I know you say you’ve done your homework but it’s not normal for something like this to be given 2 weeks before the start date!

You’ll be paying hundreds/thousands for him to attend.

The only thing I can think of is obviously getting done nearby accommodation and you and DH getting AL for half of the time each.

I would consider taking 1 of the DC for half of the time each too.

This. Sounds a bit scammy.

There is no 6 week workshop in September.

I live in LA and I wouldn't send a child alone here simply because you really need a car to get anywhere and they won't be able to drive. That is a huge opportunity though. Can you write to the course director and ask them if there is a site where parents discuss logistics? There might be others in your boat who may be looking to room share etc.

Perhaps it’s the 8 week one

That one starts on September 14th and the OP says he starts on September 1st.

The 6 week course is over $6000.