Need some advice about my 15yo son and a sudden opportunity

[sooof]

I honestly don't know what to do here and would really appreciate some outside opinions.

My son is 15 and about a month ago he applied for a film studio course. It's a 6 week programme that teaches filmmaking and also includes visits to studios. He would have to stay there for the full 6 weeks.

Honestly he applied without really thinking he would get in. It's a very prestigious programme with very limited places and it's something he's genuinely interested in. Yesterday we got the confirmation email and an official letter saying he was accepted so it's definitely happening.

He is absolutely thrilled. I don't think there is any way I could tell him no after seeing how excited he is about it. So realistically either my husband or I will have to go with him.

The problem is the timing is terrible.

We're from Madrid and currently we're away on a trip. I also have two other children who are 13 and 10. My youngest is particularly dependent on me and has never been away from me for anything close to six weeks.

I also went back to work in September and already have some important clients and commitments. If I decided to go with my son I could technically rearrange things, but it wouldn't be easy. I would have to move two important client commitments by about six weeks and there is also a summit at the end of next month that I am expected to attend.

My husband has a lot going on at work too and has a small work trip at the end of September, so it's not as simple as just saying he'll stay home with the other two.

We have about two weeks before my son has to start on September 1st so we have some time to figure out the logistics, but suddenly we're trying to reorganise work, childcare, school, travel and everything else around something we never expected to actually happen.

And honestly I'm torn.

On one hand this is a huge opportunity for my son and something he is genuinely passionate about. I don't want him to miss it because the timing is inconvenient for the rest of us.

On the other hand, leaving my younger two for six weeks feels like a huge thing too, especially my youngest. I also have responsibilities at work that can't just disappear

I don't know anything about this, but - long shot - I do wonder if you gained a bit of media/social media momentum there might be a UK star/actor/media person who's already in LA who could sponsor/support him? Appeal to altruism, etc., it would be good PR for them, too.

Perhaps I'm being naive, but you never know what might happen if the BBC or similar pick this thread up.

If you knew he was applying, the time to say "no" was before he applied.

Lots of people who are in the US legally have been detained by ICE! And some have been shot. Do you not follow the news?

How sure are you of the prestige /difficulty to get into this course.
Lots of courses will describe themselves as such and will claim its really hard to get onto it/very selective.... In practise how many families do you know that could facilitate a parent accompanying their child to a course for 6 full weeks paying for accommodation and dropping everything at home. Id be a bit sceptical to be honest of just how selective they truly are. In reality the people there will simply be those who had the flexibility as a family (whether financially or otherwise) to facilitate this.

there are so many extortionate pay loads of money to get your child experience camps! Will it really benefit him more than getting work experience as a gopher on a film studio???

if you are convinced it is legit then the answer is to ask if you can defer the place to next year in school hols and plan ahead more!

I would be thinking about what other people could be on the course.

Literally no one would travel to LA to accompany a minor who should be at school, to attend a six week course that is non-residential.
Unless there are places that don't go back to school until October?

So it would have to be older kids, very wealthy home-schooled kids, and local LA kids.

If it's really prestigious, why would it rule out kids who attend school?

You can’t just miss large chunks of year 11

Yes, I hate to be cycnical, but are you sure it's a real opportunity with legit tutors etc, and not some sort of con, or a chancer running it with no real experience or qualifications? I'm sure your DS is lovely, but what has qualified him for a prestigious and fiercely competed opportunity in film in the USA? Fair enough if he submitted some sort of amazing portfolio, but if it came out of nowhere, Id be cautious...can you provide a link to the organisations website for this cours, for example?

I was talking about accommodation, flights and food on top!

I’ve never been to the USA and so I don’t know if it’s a lot cheaper than over here but if not you’re looking at easily over a thousand pounds extra.

I’d be wanting to use that money for a family holiday and instead encouraging DS to perhaps do a uni course that has a year of work experience in the same area.

I think the entire thing is madness!

This could end up costing you $$$. Flights, accommodation, meals , transport . And if you end up hiring a chaperone , more money again.

I have a DD that was involved in a prestigious European based course but it was based on 18 + . I really don't see how a 15 year old can do anything legally in the US . No insurance, health coverage , hotel stay , car hire , etc.

I really think you will have to decline this . He is only 15 . Let him get a bit more mature first .

As others have said, lots of this doesn’t make sense - the shorty time scale, the selection process, the lack of residential support, the dates…
What is the company/organisation offering it?

I would urge you to research the course very thoroughly indeed. Who runs it, who owns it, reviews, ( not from them), why is it considered prestigious and who says so ? Check with other places about the course.

It sounds a bit off OP. Sorry to be a party pooper but is it for real ?
Something with very limited places, prestigious ( I assume they say that about themselves). An application form ?

Such places I would assume to have legions of people who will be on the phone clamouring for a place morning, noon and night.
They would have a waiting list as long as your arm.

What does he get at the end of it ? I bet they get a lot of your money.
It would worry me. Where would he stay. Do they recommend places by any chance.
He is fifteen. Be confident they are not doing some sort of work too. And what sort of visa would he need. A lot to look into.

Really check this course out… where did he learn about it.

There are many young people with degrees in film and photography. That is who film studios want.

Do none of your children go back to school on 1st September? Your 15 year old will be in Y11 too, which is such an important year.

Is this per chance NYFA?

I don't understand why you would have agreed to him applying if you weren't able to take him? I also don't understand why you'd consider 6 weeks out of school in what must be his final year for his ESO? Seems like madness to me!

But, if you did agree, I really think you have to try to get him there. Swapping halfway through between you and your dh is probably the best plan. I think your other dc would cope with a parent being away for 3 weeks if with their other parent.

I am puzzled
by this. Where are you living currently? When does school start if your eldest is wanting to go away for 6 weeks? Or has he ended schooling at 15 like they do in Switzerland. We can only advise with more detail.

Have you checked it isnt a scam? If its genuine and residential he should be going alone. Contact the place? If you cant it is a scam sadly.

There will likely be others in the same situation as him - attending on their own is an option, and one you can request advice on from the organisers who have to have support options in place to cover safeguarding, safety, etc.

Remember to agree rules with your son - check in, emergency contacts and numbers, etc

There just no way I’d let my kid do a 6 week course in America at 15! In September too! No way, he has school so unfortunately he can’t make it

What is the company/organisation offering it?

La-La Land 🤣.

I think it would be really silly to not attempt to take this opportunity. Find a way!!

Yes this.
Or is there anyone else in the family/friend who could step in.

It sounds like a great opportunity for him. I would do everything to make that work.

X

This all sounds super sketchy and too complicated. I would spend more time preparing and looking into it and let him apply next year if you think you could manage it with more lead time. There’s no chance I’d be able to do this with my kids so don’t feel guilty if you can’t make it work.

Can you employ someone you trust as a guardian for that period?

This is all very dodgy sounding and we don’t really have enough information. Either it’s aimed at more local students or they must have some kind of provision/advice regarding accommodation/travel?

• How much is the course?
• How have you concluded that it’s prestigious and hard to get a place?
• Does he not need to be in school in September?