AIBU for declining my brother-in-law's BBQ after years of rudeness?

[AmandaEatsLemons]

AIBU for telling my brother-in-law I don't want to attend his BBQ?

My brother-in-law has recently messaged the family WhatsApp with an announcement that he will be holding a BBQ next week, and he asked who would be coming. I responded with a clear "no."

He has been so incredibly rude to me and my children over the past few years. He told my eldest daughter - Tamara - that her boyfriend was "ugly," making her cry. He told my mum that her ex-husband was right to cheat on her! There's much more that I don't have time to say.

Anyway, some people on my husband's side of the family are claiming I should have put this aside and accepted the invitation anyway. Your thoughts?

Fuck sake this post went off on a tangent about BBQs being banned when none of you even know where the op lives. The national alert has only been issued to England and Wales. She could live in Ireland or Scotland, so calm your tits.

So why not just stick with MN convention and say Dd like almost everyone else?

I want to know why the daughter has a code name when nobody else does 🤔😆.

Enough with the barbecue comments! They aren’t banned everywhere. I’m in Scotland and there is no ban here, maybe the OP is as well. Or somewhere else with no ban.

Yanbu OP.

I don't know where in Australia the person you quoted is from, but where I live, some backyard BBQs are indeed banned on extreme fire danger days.

https://www.cfa.vic.gov.au/warnings-restrictions/fire-bans-ratings-and-restrictions/can-i-or-cant-i

Can I say to you gently OP... why are you taking opinions and letting folk on the family whatsapp approve or disapprove of what you do?

You don't have to apologise or justify not attending.
If they ask.. "I don't want to."

If you do go, he's only going to be rude again.

Your life your an adult your decision tell them it isn’t up for discussion and that you never asked them for their opinion so thank you but no thank you