AIBU to feel uncomfortable after builder helped himself to fridge drinks?

[Furrypaws18]

So we have builders in, everyday I give them pop, biscuits- on hot days lollies and a bacon butty on a Friday. They have toilet access/tea/coffee facilities readily available . I have purposely avoided access to my fridge so everything is out separately.
After thinking we were going through lots of drinks/snacks etc my husband decided to install a camera, to find the assistant looking through fridge and taking 2 cans for the journey home, so we think it’s been a habit. It felt like a violation. Problem is the job is otherwise going quite well, the gaffer is very respectful of the house and toilet etc but feel a bit like a soft touch now.
Boss 99% has no idea because it’s always been after he’s left. Don’t want to sour the job/their relationship etc but want him to know it wasn’t acceptable without a big showdown. Would also like to use them again, but the trust is tarnished. It’s only been drinks/food I think but still feels like a liberty. Am I being dramatic, have I given the impression it was ok? 🤔

Don’t restock cans. Just have a jug of squash in the fridge and give that to them during the day.

Let it go. Don't ruin the relationship over a few drinks. Also you don't want him getting into trouble.

X

Is the assistant quite young? Does he have a longish distance to get home? I think it's probably lack of social awareness rather than theft, especially if he's travelling some distance in a boiling hot car or bus, he probably thinks it's fine to take some cold cans for the journey. I wouldn't like it but I also wouldn't begrudge a lad a cold drink (taking several is just greedy!!) if he has a car without air con and it's 32 degrees as it is here today. Can you be there when he finishes and maybe offer him a bottle of water so he realises that just taking it isn't the norm?

Thank you all for your input, it's really helpful. Just a couple of things- outside drinks are chilled in large iced bucket. I have bought in loads of pop for them, gone through about 20+ 2 litre bottles easy, and not cheap ones. So yes the extra cans felt just too much. Wasn't whilst working, it was for the ride home.

As far as the camera goes, over time lots of supplies seemed lower than expected but we'll never really know. I just trusted them.

Totally hear everyone on the issue about getting decent people in, isn't it sad that we have to suck up this kind of thing though. It's not like we're not paying a good rate.

But thanks all - I think my husband will have quiet word - "please don't take things from our fridge, it's not ok" if that doesn't work will tell the boss as I like him and don't want him to lose work in future over this kind of thing.

but he could have filled his own water bottle up from their tap for his journey home no need to go rooting around in the op fridge when there is no one else around.

Don’t play the silly games with notes etc. just say to the manager, look some of the guys have been taking drinks from the fridge, it’s no big deal but can you ask them not to do this.

on the flip side, if they are doing a good job is it really worth the aggro for a few cans of cola?

The middle classes of MN really dislike trades don’t they

Yep this is what I’d do. I don’t think it’s worth upsetting an otherwise good working relationship over it.

Just for the record my dad was a builder and my husband is in general maintenance. Neither help themselves after being treated very well. I think the comments have been very balanced. I myself am on minimum wage and I buy myself generic pop and save the good stuff for the builders 😂

If they were doing a good job I would leave it. It's not worth jepordisings thousands or even tens of thousands of pounds worth of work for a few quids worth of pop.

I would always though make sure my valuables were removed and either hidden away or stored safely if someone was in my house unaccompanied though.

If in the very rare event someone did get light fingered it can be awfully hard to prove anything, and the chance of getting something sentimental back is very low.

How much is a can, like 50p?

You can just stop restocking them and stick with tea coffee or water

or you can think that it costs you a few quid a day (a few quid) which in relation to the total job cost (thousands?) is nothing

it has also been exceptionally hot

This. Assuming you can just take items from someone’s house is appalling.

I’d tell the boss - by text. Something along these lines: Hi Dave, thanks for all the work done so far. We’re really pleased with it. Just one issue: we’ve been providing drinks and snacks for the crew which we’re happy to do, but we’re not happy that X has been taking drinks cans out of a fridge for the journey home. We have him on camera doing this X times. Could you have a word with him please? Thanks.’

You’re not doing this bloke any favours by not saying something because sooner or later someone is going to have a huge problem with it and he could find himself in trouble. I’d just tackle it with him directly the next time you see him. Or message the boss - unless you think he might sack him rather than bollock him.

A thought to help with the bottles rate of consumption, is there also a jug of tap water or similar?

I’d be drinking anything cold and wet I was offered, if it’s only pop out I’ll drink pop but if there’s water I’d go for that first.

This.
You don't want this to continue.
Put a note on the fridge with a simple message.

You are very right - I just find it so hard as I think he'll be very embarrassed and angry. Some people think it's about a few pounds worth of drinks, but it isn't - it's the fact I had to leave him in the house multiple times and now I don't know what his boundaries are and I can't always be here. If I had genuinely left them thirsty I would TOTALLY get it, but I gave him a 2 litre coke, when is enough enough!? shall I set up a draught tap 😂

Or to avoid any embarrassment and future bad feelings, don't put anything extra in the fridge.
They are taking advantage of your generosity.
It is very rude and cheeky of them to help themselves to extra for their journey home.

I’d agree, I couldn’t get angry about this. It is unbelievably hot and I’m sure they’ve been boiling all day and probably need a cold drink. If it bothers you, maybe just leave very cheap drinks in there for them to take or move them out the fridge. If you have a camera in a workplace aka your house as that’s what it is to the builders, it’s best practice to tell them or have a sign.

I leave them cold drinks everyday though? Why are people acting like they don't get cold drinks? Genuinely do you not think they should be responsible for bringing anything at all for themselves to work. I don't get anything and I too do manual labour. I just don't like the 'help myself' attitude as I personally think it's a trust thing. I would never say no if he asked, like I said I do my best to be as generous as I can be. The joke is they get branded drinks and ours in the fridge are supermarket brands 😂

I mean you can go there and you’re not wrong, but I’d assume thays it they are done and you’re finding new buildiers for the nexy time. Even if it’s 50 quid of cola is it worth it, it’s the only thing he’s taking.

I think you’ve been very generous with them, but it is so hot. If it really bothers you just ask him to not take the drinks out the fridge at the end of the day or ‘leave some for us’. I have a manual job outside and in people’s houses and it is honestly brutal in the heat. If they are doing other things you don’t like that’s a different issue, but a few drinks in 35c heat I wouldn’t mind.

I think it’s generous that you feed them and give them any drinks at all tbh! They are being paid to do a job, not be catered for and should bring their own food and drink, not raid your house. Cheeky fuckers.

For those saying oh it’s so hot……. Well, so what?! They can go to the shop, buy drinks and bring them. It’s like people who tip the bin men, never understood that either!

Doesn't anyone else think it's relevant that he helps himself to drinks to take them home and he does it after his boss has left?

He's a thief and he knows it.

I wouldn't jeopardise the job but I would take all the pop out of the fridge and put more ice in the freezer for when I wanted to drink it.

I think people are being very harsh. We’ve had a team of four packers from the removal company here each day this week so far and they have another three days of our move to go in total. I’ve been making them tea and coffee every couple of hours, made sandwiches for lunch each day, and made it clear that they are welcome to take any of the cold drinks from the fridge whenever they want them. Im paying a huge amount for the move but it’s what I would always do for people working in my house and I think it’s particularly important in this very hot weather when they need to keep hydrated. even let them use my toilet and bathroom 😆

If you’re giving them cold drinks every day they probably think you won’t mind them
getting cold drinks from the fridge too.

Just tell them to ask you for drinks and you will give them if you have them.