Child Maintenance-Should fathers on benefits pay more?

[CalmGreenWasp]

My ExP owns his home outright, receives in excess of £1,200/month in disability benefits and works cash in hand. His only outgoings are food and utility bills for himself. Is it fair that he only pays £7.00/week maintenance for our DD10? For context, I am a lone parent and own a mortgaged home. I slightly exceed the threshold for universal credit. My disposable household income after mortgage and bills equates to half his, but with two people to support. Is the system broke? Should disposable income be considered by CMS when paying parent is in receipt of benefits?

There are two issues

The first is that there are already a lot of powers, its the unwillingness of the CMS (DSWP, HMRC etc) to use them.

Clearly in this case there are a number of agencies that might be potentially interested in the non resident partner but in practice are not.

Secondly prior to the CSA the 'Parent with care' did all the legal leg work, this is now blocked and can potentially leave the taxpayer on the hook for losses as a result of the CMS's incompetence or unwillingness.

This is exactly what prompted my post. Whilst I paid for multiple clubs, hobbies and holidays over the years, I am paying for a tutor so that she can sit transfer test (eleven plus in England I think?). She is not losing out, I find the money from somewhere, but I don’t drink/smoke/buy clothes new for myself. A cup of coffee in a shop is not a luxury I can afford. Every last penny I have goes to my daughter

I agree with you op. My ex does pay cms and its not nothing, but compared to what I cover, its nowhere near half and we earn similarly. I have funded tutoring, school fees (out of necessity, after state proved unable to provide what they needed), AuAdhd assessments, private dentistry, laptops for school, expensive hobbies with no input from him other than the statutory CMS. Yes, technically those are all choices or luxuries but realistically, a good parent will make them happen so their children can thrive. There is no comprehensive list of what its meant to cover, just vague references to 'essentials'. I'd happily do 50/50 but he never wanted it. I know there are difficulties on the 'other side'..sometimes paying parents are wrongly assessed but whataboutery helps no-one. The whole thing needs radical overhaul but there is no political will at all.

Drink/drug driving is an instant ban. Mh wouldn't protect him from that. If anything it would work against him as if it was having such an effect its his responsibility to contact the dvla which he has failed to do.

Goodness, @CalmGreenWasp I would buy you a cup of coffee every week and more. I hope that your child’s father one day regrets his actions and tries to make amends.

So often it is female-run services and charities that pick up the slack for absent fathers. Baby banks are probably an example of this. But I still donate because it’s generally mothers who are left holding the baby.

Apologies for the historic language but there used to be an offence (not sure if it was civil or criminal) called ‘bastardy’ whereby men who had fathered children out of wedlock were brought before magistrates and made to pay the costs of ‘lying in’ (i.e.childbirth) if those had been met by the parish. There was the cost and also the shame factor, as the men were publicly named in court.

It's almost as if the CMS (DSWP, HMRC etc) are run by men ...

This is the problem. There is no shame in it anymore. I asked that he helped me with the cost of tuition and provided him with a breakdown of what she “costs” annually (12.5k!). He told me that I need to budget better and said that it looked like our child was “loaded.” She is a bright young girl who is easily carried, she asks me for very little, god love her. I take consolation that she is equipped with the tools to flourish in this world and that some day I will have her and my grandchildren around me, while he sits with his drug buddies.

This is the problem. There is no shame in it anymore.

Anymore ? Was there ever ?

Well yes, I think there used to be.

Isn’t that where ideas of a man ‘doing the decent thing’ came from?

Because not taking responsibility for a child you had conceived was seen as dishonourable, even in fairly recent history.

£7 a week IS DISGUSTING.

Please tell me how? I work pt dh is unable to work due to MS. I cant increase my hours due to caring. Ive never smoked and last time I had a drink was a bottle of wine on xmas day. I'm sick of the idea everyone on benefits is well off. We live below the poverty line. Over 2k a month down since DH had to be medically retired 4 years ago but cost of living continues to rise.

Bet you have something, people on benefits usually do, Disney plus, Netflix, Amazon prime, phone contract, sky, even if you claim
Not to I won’t believe you, my ex is on benefits and smokes, drinks, always has the latest phone and designer clothes.

Here we go again... people on benefits having Netflix like it is the crime of the century. It is £6pm.

Not just Netflix is it, broadband, phone contract, Amazon prime Disney plus, sky, you should have nothing if you can’t pay for your kids, no luxuries

Do you mean his PIP? Or do you mean his basic universal credit benefits? His PIP is meant to be used to help him pay for the extra expenses that his disability incurs, and his standard Universal Credit is to cover his basic living expenses. Does he get the Limited Capability for Work component of UC? If he does, because he’s claiming he can’t work, and is working CIH, that needs reporting.

His child maintenance should come out of his earnings, not his UC, so the solution is to make his earnings be declared, which is easier said than done, and may involve him being prosecuted for benefit fraud.

He sounds like a horrible feckless excuse for a father, I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this.

You need a smart phone to access your UC account.
Broadband is pretty much a totally normal utility bill.

Remember Hitchens razor ... cleans up MN a lot.

😂 yeah and kids need feeding 👍

Library: free internet no one “needs” a smart phone or broadband lol

But they are normal everyday things.
No one "needs" most things they use and take for granted.

And people on benefits who don’t pay much for their kids should suffer and life should be horrible they should have to go out and find a library to use the internet!!

Actually as technology has advanced I am going to have to disagree that you don't need a phone potentially with internet.

Whilst I've not had to claim benefits on many years I have for many other things in life needed to have 2 factor authentication to access apps, and that absolutely does require a phone and annoyingly most old brick phones would not support the apps/technology needed to do so.

So we need to get past having a smartphone/internet being seen as a luxury and understand in these times it is very much a necessity.

THAT said....NOBODY NEEDS the latest fucking iPhone or a £50pm contract 🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ I bought my phone second cheap hand and have a £20pm all in SIM that covers everything.

Surely that's his own doing for taking drugs and getting addicted?

Sadly the system is made by man to serve the man. I have tried to increase cm because of undeclared income but they didn’t even bother to call the dad to ask about this…they said they can’t see on hmrc income …how these dads can live with those scams on their own kids is beyond me.

That does not matter.
Would you deny benefits to someone who was paralysed after a skiing accident?