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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Child Maintenance-Should fathers on benefits pay more?

211 replies

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 09:19

My ExP owns his home outright, receives in excess of £1,200/month in disability benefits and works cash in hand. His only outgoings are food and utility bills for himself. Is it fair that he only pays £7.00/week maintenance for our DD10? For context, I am a lone parent and own a mortgaged home. I slightly exceed the threshold for universal credit. My disposable household income after mortgage and bills equates to half his, but with two people to support. Is the system broke? Should disposable income be considered by CMS when paying parent is in receipt of benefits?

OP posts:
Rosesandthorns66 · 11/08/2026 14:56

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 11:39

My ex doesn’t suffer from physical disability. He claims for his MH, but still manages to work 9-5, five days a week, cash in hand, of course

Its the cash in hand thats the problem, which lets these people get away with not having to pay Child Maintenance.
The people who employ and pay cash in hand are also the problem.
Theres no easy solution for this.
You can't report it without solid proof.
The employers deny they have these employees who they are paying cash in hand to.

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 15:03

I reported to CMS. I doubt HMRC would be able to do much given the nature of his Company. A lot of customers pay cash in hand and I would dare say that a lot of revenue goes undeclared at the best of times. I know I just need to suck it up, but it is upsetting to witness his lavish, carefree life, while I am taxed heavily and financially struggle raising his daughter. A tale as old as time I suppose

OP posts:
Seymour5 · 11/08/2026 15:49

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 14:34

In his case, he works for his family’s roofing company, of which he was formerly a director.

Shame on him and his family for enabling him to avoid supporting his own child.

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 11/08/2026 15:50

Rosesandthorns66 · 11/08/2026 14:56

Its the cash in hand thats the problem, which lets these people get away with not having to pay Child Maintenance.
The people who employ and pay cash in hand are also the problem.
Theres no easy solution for this.
You can't report it without solid proof.
The employers deny they have these employees who they are paying cash in hand to.

The other problem is that he has been able to be signed off work due to MH, fully covered by the taxpayer, when he is clearly able to work as he is doing so.

SerendipityJane · 11/08/2026 15:50

Seymour5 · 11/08/2026 15:49

Shame on him and his family for enabling him to avoid supporting his own child.

Imagine if the owners of such businesses were treated the same as if they had been employing an undocumented immigrant.

Still,we have to get our priorities right.

MotherofPufflings · 11/08/2026 15:55

I would like to see the law changed so that there is a minimum amount of maintenance that a child is entitled to and that money is paid to the resident parent via HMRC. That money then becomes a debt from the non-resident parent to the government and it is owed (with interest) for the rest of their life and from their estate if necessary. No escape, no way of wriggling out of it. It's only written off if there's no money left when they die.

It will never happen, but as a society non-payment of child maintenance should be treated as seriously as tax evasion.

SerendipityJane · 11/08/2026 15:59

MotherofPufflings · 11/08/2026 15:55

I would like to see the law changed so that there is a minimum amount of maintenance that a child is entitled to and that money is paid to the resident parent via HMRC. That money then becomes a debt from the non-resident parent to the government and it is owed (with interest) for the rest of their life and from their estate if necessary. No escape, no way of wriggling out of it. It's only written off if there's no money left when they die.

It will never happen, but as a society non-payment of child maintenance should be treated as seriously as tax evasion.

So the children of the next family end up suffering ?

And you can't get blood out of a stone.

Oxo01 · 11/08/2026 16:06

FrippEnos · 11/08/2026 12:31

Report him.

This
But wouldnt it be great if you could get somone to film him working for a few weeks if you can, then send the video when you report him

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 16:19

Another thing that does bother me is that he could earn 70k plus, through the books, but if he receives any form of benefit eg low rate care component for PIP, he would still only have to pay £7/wk. A benefit entitlement letter seems to be a get out of jail free card..

OP posts:
Theunamedcat · 11/08/2026 16:25

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 12:35

I tried that, but tbh they were not interested, they clearly do not have the resources to investigate

Report the company to HMRC they take tax evasion seriously far more seriously than child maintenance service takes spiting children from child support

Theunamedcat · 11/08/2026 16:27

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 16:19

Another thing that does bother me is that he could earn 70k plus, through the books, but if he receives any form of benefit eg low rate care component for PIP, he would still only have to pay £7/wk. A benefit entitlement letter seems to be a get out of jail free card..

That's not true at all its just not counted towards his income

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 16:33

My understanding is the £7 flat rate is triggered automatically if your are in receipt of any qualifying benefits eg universal credit, pip, state pension, regardless of income- but I might be wrong

OP posts:
XenoBitch · 11/08/2026 16:36

The hidden earnings is the issue, not being on benefits. They can't pay what they do not have.

Boomer55 · 11/08/2026 16:39

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 09:19

My ExP owns his home outright, receives in excess of £1,200/month in disability benefits and works cash in hand. His only outgoings are food and utility bills for himself. Is it fair that he only pays £7.00/week maintenance for our DD10? For context, I am a lone parent and own a mortgaged home. I slightly exceed the threshold for universal credit. My disposable household income after mortgage and bills equates to half his, but with two people to support. Is the system broke? Should disposable income be considered by CMS when paying parent is in receipt of benefits?

Benefits are worked out with what people need to live on. Disability benefits aren't counted as income.

If you know he's got other income, then report him.

Maverickess · 11/08/2026 16:46

SerendipityJane · 11/08/2026 15:59

So the children of the next family end up suffering ?

And you can't get blood out of a stone.

Or maybe he doesn't go on to have the next family if he can't afford both?

DoAWheelie · 11/08/2026 16:51

The issue here is the cash in hand fraud. Benefits are already bare minimum and taking more would leave people unable to eat.

It only feels unfair as he is committing fraud, your "solution" is only going to hurt those struggling not those who are playing the system.

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 11/08/2026 16:53

DoAWheelie · 11/08/2026 16:51

The issue here is the cash in hand fraud. Benefits are already bare minimum and taking more would leave people unable to eat.

It only feels unfair as he is committing fraud, your "solution" is only going to hurt those struggling not those who are playing the system.

The issue is he shouldn’t be on benefits as he can clearly work.

Not sure how as MN always tells us there is no benefit fraud….

We’re all being rinsed by this man.

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 16:54

There is no second family in my situation..I could atleast rationalise him paying virtually nothing for our daughter if there were other children involved, but no, he just doesn’t want to pay anything for his only child..

OP posts:
Sweetpeasaremadeforbees · 11/08/2026 16:54

Maverickess · 11/08/2026 16:46

Or maybe he doesn't go on to have the next family if he can't afford both?

Yes maybe it would make other women think twice before choosing to procreate with these princes.

XenoBitch · 11/08/2026 16:54

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 11/08/2026 16:53

The issue is he shouldn’t be on benefits as he can clearly work.

Not sure how as MN always tells us there is no benefit fraud….

We’re all being rinsed by this man.

Edited

You can work and be on benefits. PIP is not an out of work benefit, and even people on LCW/LCWRA/ESA are allowed to work if their job does not contradict the reason they are on LCW/LCWRA/ESA.

x2boys · 11/08/2026 17:00

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 16:19

Another thing that does bother me is that he could earn 70k plus, through the books, but if he receives any form of benefit eg low rate care component for PIP, he would still only have to pay £7/wk. A benefit entitlement letter seems to be a get out of jail free card..

Pretty sure thsts not true as PIP is non means tested.

x2boys · 11/08/2026 17:02

CalmGreenWasp · 11/08/2026 16:33

My understanding is the £7 flat rate is triggered automatically if your are in receipt of any qualifying benefits eg universal credit, pip, state pension, regardless of income- but I might be wrong

PiP is non means tested so even a millionaire could claim it if entitled

fiftyfiftyfifty · 11/08/2026 17:03

Of course those on benefits can afford to pay more, these comments are laughable so many women defending men paying pittance, yes they can afford more than £7 a week on benefits and if they can’t how about getting a bloody job!! Being on benefits should be hard not easy so if he can’t afford £7 it will force him into getting a job!

sittingonabeach · 11/08/2026 17:07

Report him to HMRC and DWP, if he is working 9-5. His lifestyle must be very different to what it should be just on benefits

Boreded · 11/08/2026 17:07

There are two things here…benefits aren’t supposed to be high enough that you have tonnes spare so can pay child support, they’re meant to be so that you don’t die of starvation or go homeless, literally they are to keep you going until you can get a job (disabilities aside obviously).

The cash in hand work is the actual problem, too many scummy men are pocketing their earnings and not paying the right amount for their children, or in tax. It will be a tough one to ever catch him out though, they always seem to get away with it