AIBU to want to move house after falling over so spectacularly?

[WhiteWriting]

This morning I tripped over the doorframe, fell into the house, pulled the curtain pole down, broke two toes and ended up at the doctors with a cut on my leg that wouldn't stop bleeding. All this in front of the guys working on my house who witnessed me crying and swearing like a trooper. Also cried in front of the nurse. And the neighbours witnessed it all too. I have to move now don't I? Come and tell me your 'I fell over' tales of woe to make me feel better please.

And will have to lie to the handyman tomorrow. I can't say ' I pulled this pole down. Please put it back where it was' can I?

Walking, talking condom has me creased up with laughter. I feel okay about laughing with impunity at other people’s misfortunes as I have already posted yet a small sample of my own falls.

I was taking photos of some beautiful architecture in a lovely European city, walking backwards, fell down an open manhole cover.

First day of our trip. Cuts and bruises all over my legs. Had to go and buy myself a new outfit as mine was trashed. I was with people I didn't know overly well who I desperately liked and wanted to think I'm was cool so I laughed it off but I was low-key worried I was going to get sepsis or something from cutting myself on a drain 😅🤣

But....the camera survived, thank heavens! And I'm still friends with the people I was travelling with. I even photographed their wedding so I can't have made that much of a bad impression as the clutzy photographer!

So many!
Into a lake while trying to fish the dog’s ball out when he wouldn’t get it.
Flat on my back into the water by standing on a slime covered rock by a waterfall, momentarily lost consciousness but didn’t let go of the dog’s lead! Cut the back of my head open and when I got home my daughter forced me to a&e where it took about three of them to glue it up well enough to stop the blood. The cubicle floor looked like a murder had happened.
In New York having got off the bus from the airport and walking to the hotel my suitcase wheel caught in a small pothole whilst crossing a road but I kept going and fell on my knees.
Worst of all, going to pick up a young child from an activity, I was bringing their bike for them to ride home, being quite lazy I was riding it standing up on the pedals, when for some unknown reason I decided to jam the brakes on whilst going downhill and flew over the handlebars cutting the palms of my hands so badly I couldn’t bear to do anything, including driving, for a couple of days until they started to heal.

I once fell over so spectacularly I fell clean out of my shoes.
So instead of jumping up and rushing off as pride dictated, I had to walk back and put my shoes back on.
Witnessed by a fair few going about their regular business.

With boyfriend who is now my husband. Caught a foot in the seat belt (no retracting reels, shows how long ago!) as I was getting out of his mini and ended up on my arse in the gutter. Classy move.

Being older I have a stool with arms high / low thingy to get me up and down when.i garden . Front garden slopes fairly steeply . Talking to both sides male neighbours ( one older than me one a bit younger ) felt the stool tilt and roll down the hill taking me with it knickers on full view . Ended up across the pavement on the road neighbours had multiplied by now most trying not to laugh ! Only my pride was hurt I now kneel on a cushion and crawl to the wall to pull myself up

My first day in new job in London, Euston station, I went down like I’d been shot.
my stuff scattered, not one person helped me.
I got up, limped onto the train and looked down, the most expensive tights I’d ever owned had 2 massive holes in the knees. Tears were shed.

My most spectacular was doing the splits in a cat vomit slick on my sitting room floor at about 7 one morning. I live alone so I had to stagger, in agony from a pulled tendon, to the sofa where I lay for ten minutes before I was even able to hobble.

Three months later, my back went ping as a result of this, and I was out of action for a month.

The cat is fine, thank you for asking.

Cabbaged myself outside my office last summer in front of a sweet elderly postman. Fell so hard that I smashed my chin and shoulder as well as hands. Skirt shot up over my hips. Nailed it.

im sorry but I laughed at the part where your friend thought your head was the opposite way round, that must have scared her !

I once smacked into a lamp post when distracted by something on the other side of the road. This was on a very well-to-do and busy road in south west London. It made a comical ‘clang’ sound and I literally pinged backwards onto my arse.

Got to the pub, ordered soft drink, reserved a table upstairs. Went back downstairs for ‘something’ fell down all of the stairs and sprained both ankles. Worst place to fall even at noon bc everyone in the pub and at the minor injuries unit said i was wearing inappropriate footwear and had been drinking…i was lucky, bruises on ankles and ego only. Pub has now widened stairs and added handrails - i was not the only one!

I tripped over a stone in my local car park, fell flat on my face. I was rescued....by Howard from Take That!!! I died with embarrassment, as he helped me back to my car!!!

One sunny afternoon, I fell out of my shed, made a very loud and guttural cavewoman noise of some kind on the way down and then lay on the ground for a few minutes wondering wtf just happened.

I know the noise would have bounced round all the surrounding walls, so I expect my neighbours were like startled meerkats over the fences.

I obviously just (eventually) slunk inside and pretended it wasn't me.

I face planted at an exhibition centre. I was so shell shocked I held my bloody hands up to a stranger and cried. I then had to get myself up and find my partner who was in the middle of watching a demo.

Despite the cost of entry I made my partner leave immediately.

Fell over in the beer garden of a pub. I was carrying a drink in each hand. I managed by some miracle to sort of flip onto my back, whilst holding the drinks aloft, but my short dress ended up riding up so high that my Spanx (a fetching colour of hearing aid beige) were exposed to the world while I rolled around on my back like a beetle.

Ok to have one from a friend (yes, really). She was a teacher working with a young man teacher (the youngest 2 teachers in the school, and you know what kids are like making up intrigue). She slipped on the stairs and fell right on top of him, in front of everyone.
My husband fell on ice, right in front of a car and his legs flipped up like a breakdancer.

I just started a new job 3 years ago, 2 months in I tripped over walking down the corridor and fell flat on my face in front of 5 of the other exec team.

And to top it off I was carrying a cup of tea that I threw all over them/ the wall/ myself.

It was hideous!! I nearly quit on the spot!! The laugh about it now 🙈 i still go red thinking about it!

Yow, I hope you can rest up and feel better soon!

When I had just met my now-partner twenty years ago he came round for a date. We went up to the roof of the flat I lived in where there was a nice decking/terrace bit. Naturally, I slipped right over in the most spectacular way - no idea how. I hadn't even had a drink. I was wearing tights (and a skirt, don't worry) but I had a bruise the size of a cricket ball on my backside for weeks. You know how when you get a bruise on a fleshy bit - the good thing was plenty of padding, the worst the lovely black, purple, green and then yellow it went.

Tripped over my own feet whilst crossing at a 4 way light controlled crossing in the middle of Leeds city centre. Landed hard on the ground. All the drivers in their cars waiting at the lights, staring at me. No pedestrians helped me either. Picked myself up, in pain, and hobbled away, whilst being watched by, well, everyone nearby 😏

I know I’m wicked but I’ve giggled my way through this thread. I fell down my stairs at home while rushing from upstairs to answer the door. As usual I had bare feet which caused me to slip on the carpet. My legs went up in the air and I slalomed down the whole flight on my bottom, hitting every stair as I went. I laid on the hall floor trying to regain my composure and because everything hurt I crawled to the front door and reached up to open it. I gazed up only to see my MP staring down at me. It was just before the last election and he was out canvassing. I whimpered ‘I’ve just fallen down the stairs’ and instead of a bit of concern for one of his constituents he mumbled something about coming back as this obviously wasn’t a good time for me and made a hasty retreat. Needless to say I didn’t vote for the hard-hearted fucker.

I’ve fallen over countless times, always undignified and often very painful, what gets me us the difference between English and European cultures in responding to someone who is obviously hurt: in England the question always is,”Are you OK?” (You evidently arent); in France it’s “Etes-vous blesse?” - are you hurt. Much more sympathetic!

Out at one of our local clubs in my mid twenties, just about to leave so in the foyer area. I was approached by a lad who asked if I wanted to go home with him for the night, I declined, probably not politely! I then fainted, next thing I came round with 2 bouncers having carried me into a side room, I had cut my chin and blood was pouring everywhere. I was so embarrassed and my mate said everybody was commenting how drunk I probably was but I was only on Diet Coke! I would not go there for months after and I still have a slight scar on my chin from it 🙄🤣🤣

I once witnessed a man and a woman on weston super mare sea front having the mother of all fights, screaming at each other, he said ‘you’re an evil cunt’ turned to storm off and walked straight into a lampost knocking himself out cold. She kicked him and walked off the other way.
It was the most glorious thing i’ve ever seen.