To find this entitled?

[Aaaaaaaaaaaaahh]

This doesn't apply to people with childcare or caring responsibilities, any sort of illness or disability which means they cannot work full time.
But I've seen a few people on here or social media basically saying 'I can do supply/care work/0 hours work and sometimes only get a shift or two a week, because my husband earns well.'

So they're pretty much choosing to swan about and avoid full-time work, because they assume their husband or partner will carry on in their high-earning, full time role.

What happens if this husband loses their job, becomes sick, or just decides they're sick of having to be the breadwinner?

I see it all the time on supply teacher pages,'Oh I've only had 1 day of work in 2 months but it's fine because my husband is the breadwinner!!'

There are other jobs where you could make a living, you just don't want to do them, yet you still want your dream forever house and luxury lifestyle. If it were the wife full-time and the husband taking the piss there would be uproar.

And then in conversation with said women they talk about things "we" can afford or things "we" have bought.

Well I actually said it's completely understandable if you had childcare/caring etc ..

Why does it bother you? It's really none of your business
You have no idea what someone else's circumstances are, why they don't work full time or what they spend their time doing.

A woman on another thread got berated for saying she has to do all the cleaning because her husband is always out, as apparently 2 adults should barely produce any mess whatsoever. But here the woman should be entitled to as much time as needed to clean the home without kids..

So you think everyone should work full time? In my friendship circle and family there are very few couples where they both work full time. It just would be possible for us to both work full time without employing an expensive nanny and barely seeing our children. We would need childcare 7am-7pm.

On my friendship circle is not only the women who are part time. I have one friend who works full time whilst her husband work 3 days a week and another friend where they both work three days a week.

Once we no longer have school fees to pay my husband will probably also work part time.

So many threads on here are sharing an opinion of something that isn't really other people's business, most of them in fact.

Yet another person justifying the childcare element even though I said that's completely different.

If you don’t quote people don’t know who you are replying to

Honestly, if it leaves a job free for someone that needs it then that's fine by me.
I used to work with a woman who worked 2 days a week "for pin money", she didn't need the job financially, when there were mass redundancies she put a preference to stay rather than take redundancy. I actually thought that was selfish

It's only a double standard if there's an expectation. There's no indication that, in these relationships you allude to, anyone is having expectations of their partner. It would be more sensible to assume, in the absence of evidence to the contrary, that these arrangements have been agreed upon by both parties concerned. In that scenario nobody is being unreasonable or having unreasonable expectations, nobody is being entitled, nobody is taking advantage. It's just two people agreeing to do things differently than you'd like to do them. And that's fine - because it's not your life, not your marriage and not your partner, so it really doesn't involve you in any way.

You do sound jealous TBH. Those women have got something you haven't got and you want to take it away from them, just because it would give you satisfaction to see them not having it. That's pretty twisted.
The only person your jealous feelings are hurting is you. Why do that to yourself? Why live that way, overinvested in things that don't concern you and having thoughts that cause you to feel bad?

Why not focus on your own life instead and making it into whatever you want it to be? Whilst ignoring what others are up to. Then you'd have no cause to be unhappy and life would be better for you.

It's none of your business if someone has a DH who can afford to and wants to pay for all or most of their expenses. If a couple have plenty of money (that would be split if they got divorced) building up more and more money they will never use just for the sake of (if they don't want a job for other reasons) is not necessarily virtuous.

I only worked part time while DS was growing up, and now that he's an adult I still only work part time (zero hours contract).

The only person who has to be ok with that is my husband, I couldn't care less if anyone else (especially randoms I don't know on an internet forum!) thinks I'm lazy or entitled! But almost all my friends are the same or don't work at all so it's not an issue.

What is completely different?

Have been a SAHM for the last few years Not planning on going back any time soon. Lots of my friends work full time and really no one cares. I don't judge them and they don't judge me. We are all trying our best and have different circumstances.

Are these people you know or complete strangers? You seem strangely worked up about people who have no impact on your life.

Nobody needs to justify anything. I haven’t worked full time since 1995 and certainly haven’t spent 31 years with childcare responsibilities. Dh and have taken on roles which work for our unit.

There are other jobs where you could make a living, you just don't want to do them, yet you still want your dream forever house and luxury lifestyle. If it were the wife full-time and the husband taking the piss there would be uproar.

I don't think there would be. I also wouldn't view it as taking the piss. Surely its about families deciding what works best for them. The consensus on MN tends to be that women should keep working so that they don't end up with nothing - no career, pension, work skills etc - not because they are taking the pee if they don't. But if you don't need to work more than a few hours/days a week, and you don't particularly want to, why should you?

I mean entitled I think is the wrong word.

but I mean meh…. I don’t have to work for the same reason but I wanted to teach my kids that you need to work. I work 6 nights a week.

If you'd rather work and pay your way, why are you bothered that other people have different arrangements? You sound very angry about something that doesn't affect you.

I’m a SAHM because I want to be and we can afford to. What’s it got to do with you? 😂

How you can possibly know that the husband is having to stay in their job without being given a choice? You are incredibly judgemental and as others have said, just sound jealous

Yes I was thinking this. Lots of people looking for work, if your working and don’t need to isn’t that being a bit unfair? Assuming you work in the sort of role that would be easily filled of course. I work in care and there are loads of vacancies so not an issue.

It's not a double standard. Many men enjoy being a provider and breadwinner and many women enjoy being homemakers / SAHM's. It's not the same thing with the roles reversed any you know it isn't.

How is that entitled, it's genius.

Keep a foot on the job market, keep cv up to date, only do a few hours here and there. If or when they need a full time salary, they just increase their hours?

what's wrong with that?

I can only imagine jealousy from people who can't afford to the same, because otherwise, why would anyone care if Linda does 10 hours a month, or 44 hours a week?

As long as both partners have agreed this is how it's going to be, it isn't entitled. It is not what I would choose, it's high risk for the reasons you have already mentioned, but it isn't entitled. If anything it's leaving work available for people who really need it and want it.