AIBU to snap after my mum kept calling a bike a trike?

[Crayo]

i am looking to get my daughter her first bike. She’s 5 and has had a balance bike before but never a real bike. Everytime I speak to my mum she asks me if I’ve found a “trike” yet. I keep telling her it’s a bike I’m getting, 2 wheels” and she always says “oh yes, you know what I mean”.

Well this has been going on weeks and literally everytime I speak to her she asks about the “trike” and I constantly correct her and say “bike”. She does have a habit of asking the same question for weeks at a time and she also has form for deliberately saying the wrong words for attention and it’s tiring.

this morning I was at my mums and my sister was there. I went to toilet and when I came back my sister said “not being funny but isn’t DD old enough for a proper bike now?” I asked what she was on about as I am getting her a proper bike and she said “mum! You said she was getting a trike!”

So I lost it, screamed and shouted “stop saying it’s a fucking trike!! You know it’s not so just fucking stop it”

my sister said “Jesus Christ is there any need for that?” So I told her she’s been saying trike for weeks and it’s winding me up so she said “she gets mixed up, there’s no need to scream like that” but the annoying part is she doesn’t get mixed up!!! She does it on purpose and has been doing this for years!

I think this too!

And it has such deniability- “why would that be annoying?”

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Think you’ve hit the nail on the head tbh OP

People who haven’t experienced anything like it won’t get it!

Have you considered a scooter? 🛴 🛴

or a pony 🐎🐴

That's not really indicative of any neurodivergence except autism, as far as I'm aware.

My mum called CDs ‘tapes’ for about 30 years but at no point did I a) believe she was doing it on purpose or b) start screaming and shouting at her about it.

I imagine it probably wasn’t part of a larger pattern of behaviour then, as appears to be the case with the OP?

It doesn't sound like manipulation to me. The OP shouted and swore at her DM. That's what the apology is for.
I know my DH isn't being rude on purpose he's just dozy 😃

No no no! Evil bastard things! I smashed my face falling off a scooter when I was OP's daughter's age (albeit I was trying to do an Evil Kneivel jump off a ramp so not entirely the scooter's fault) 🤕

OP this is the kind of shite my dad used to pull, any excuse to wind me up. When I'd inevitably blow my fuse he'd be all "FGS can't you take a joke?" Tedious as hell.

This sounds like just a sort of thing my mum would say so I can really sympathise with you OP. I’ll be honest, I deliberately patronise my mum now by saying “ now come on Mum, try and think and remember what the right word is because we have talked about this a lot”. That way, I’m being perfectly polite to her, but she absolutely hates it and sometimes it does stop her being so irritating!! My mum definitely does these sorts of things deliberately, it sounds like yours is too, it is so frustrating.

Massive overreaction and definitely unreasonable to shout and swear at her. I envy you if that’s your biggest worry in life.

Did you fart?

These enmeshed families sound so unpleasant. All spend loads of time together, probably holiday together and use each other for childcare etc - but no one actually likes one another. And constant simmering tension and resentment. What a horror show. And the kids growing up in it all think that this is how normal families operate

You did overreact, but I know how annoying this can be. A friend was obviously bothered in some way by an activity I do, and would often ask me about it, getting it slightly wrong. So think instead of ‘how is your unicycle crocheting going’ it would be ‘are you still enjoying underwater basket weaving’ ? In the end I just ignored the ‘mistake’ and it stopped.

What a lot of assumptions you’ve made there.

Does it really matter????

Dh and I bought dfil a bonsai tree. He liked it so we bought another one. Dmil referred to it as a "Banzai tree. ". Dh built a model Japanese aeroplane kit and placed it in the foliage. It was taken in the spirit of the malapropism.

OK, that makes sense. I can see why you blew up, although it would have been better to go with the cleverer replies suggested by others.

You have two options if you want to address this with her rather than ignore it - and her.

1. Set out clearly what you think about why she does this and how you’re going to respond.
2. Go with the smart response about suggesting she sees her GP as she can’t remember simple words.

She sounds incredibly annoying.

Tbh if you thought your behaviour was fine you wouldn’t be posting here

I envy people who don’t have a mother who wears you down with things like this to such an extent that you eventually snap.

Yeah people don't get it but I've experienced it and it's maddening.

My ex friend did stuff like this. I knew her since we were children and I'd see her bizarre competitiveness. I got really into running in my 30s. Other people would remark, just a throwaway like "saw you did another marathon, bloody hell - impressive" before moving on.

I'd see her stiffen then she'd revisit the topic for absolutely no reason but refer to my JOGGING - every bloody time. I laughed the first few times saying "it's running come on, even if sometimes it's jogging at least say running..." She would twitch then immediately ask another question using the word jogging. Other times she'd bring it up "are you still doing a bit of jogging?" Ridiculous.

If I tried to explain to anyone I know I'd get the reaction you're getting here so I'd just inwardly roll my eyes and think how sad.

Clearly you don't understand.

Reasonable ones I’d guess

The op refers to this as going on throughout her entire life