Will it be weird if I post on WhatsApp looking for friends?

[LTB2]

We live in a little community with around 45 houses. No one really walks around the grounds as they all have big gardens so the kids play in their gardens. My daughter has made lots of friends but my son who is very much my double in that he’s introverted and extremely shy has told me he’s sad as his sister doesn’t let him join when she’s with her friends and he wants a friend in the neighbourhood.

I feel like posting a message in the community WhatsApp if anyone has a boy similar age and would like to come over. I feel a bit weird about doing this! I am feeling anxious as I don’t think it’s the best way to do it so I’m asking how can I make friends for him and how? We never see anyone walking really except for the same people with their dogs. I saw a woman out earlier with what looked like a 4/5 year old boy but she wasn’t very friendly. I see her often but apart from be saying hello to her she doesn’t seem to want to chat so I’ve left it. Our direct neighbours have no kids,

What would be a good way to get him to make friends in the neighbourhood? As I said no one really walks around for us to bump into potential friends

How did your daughter make friends?

Do any of her friends have brothers or know any boys who are your son's age?

How old is he?

If he’s old enough to want friends then presumably he is nursery or school age - can you suggest meet ups to nursery or school parents?

Or if younger / not at nursery do you go to any playgroups or library activities for small kids, could ask around there?

Is there a playground nearby?

I think asking in places where people have similar age kids is more likely to yield results than asking in the neighbourhood whatsapp

There was one girl in her class and she introduced her. No there’s no chance of him playing with as my daughter has explicitly said no to him and me asking!

He’s 7. He wants to have a friend where we live so they can bike together

Im assuming you live in gated community where kids play out and it all appears rather safe. If it is safe fo
play outside then why not ask a school friend over and they go biking around with you following at a distance. He’s more likely have more confidence with a friend there to approach and talk to other kids.

I don’t think it would do any harm posting it.

Ibe had a little think and you know what you have nothing to lose. There’s likely a mom or dad fraught and knackered trying to keep their little boy entertained that a prospect of them making a friend where they can be out of each others houses and riding their bikes would be a dream.

if you do it please let us know the outcome. I hate to see kids lonely and wanting a mate to play with

I think it’s a bit weird, as much as good intentioned I would not make my seven year old child go to a strangers house and play with their child. Christ as Adult I’d not want to do that.

This is a good idea, does he have school friends, could you do a play date?

Could you hold a community get together or something that families might then attend?

If I were you I'd say just this. No harm in putting that in a WhatsApp group. Doesn't come across as desperate for friends or anything. Good luck!

Could he go to cubs)scouts? Is there a group that do board games/dungeons and dragons/Pokémon/Lego? Its difficult for boys sometimes

Just get school friends over?

I think it’s fine in the whastsapp group, but suggest playing out - i wouldn’t let my son in a strangers house

I honestly don't see the harm. If you can help him get a little friend that would be so great for him. He's at an age where it's not weird for him mam to sus things out. You might even find that there's another mam in the same position and wishing her boy had a friend.

If it's a community WhatsApp then even better as you're reaching out to many others and not just messaging one person. You could always word it saying your little boy name 7 is hoping to make some friends and that he'll be out on bike (pick a day) and anyone who would be interested in joining him he be really delighted. Just make it bright and breezy, don't do house invites yet not until more familiar with families.

Someone put something similar on the WhatsApp for my estate, I thought it was lovely, not weird I don't think.

I would take NO for an answer … either she helps her brothers make some friends or she loses her going out allowance, why is she being allowed to dictate what she will or won’t do?!?

TBH I’d be questioning my parenting of the daughter here - she’s been pretty mean to refuse to introduce him at all to the neighbourhood kids

I’ve seen similar on our Estate Facebook page, people generally offer to meet with the kids in a natural place, like local park, grassed area etc to see if the kids get in before going to each others houses.

How mean, the op didn’t say that, give your head a wobble.

I'm bit confused about where you live. Is it a small village and they go to school in the nearby town? Does he have friends from school you can invite over?

I think it’s a good idea and don’t think it is weird at all. How old is your daughter? I see your son is 7. I’ll be honest I think it is a little mean of your daughter not letting him join in. I wouldn’t accept that as a parent if mine acted that way.

But the OP pretty much did say that. Not in the original post but in the subsequent comments. I completely agree too, I think it is very mean.

Well yes she did actually. Pretty explicitly.

We have a community WhatsApp group for our area and people do this all the time. Often if they’ve moved recently they just introduce themselves and say we will be at this place at this time, my children are these ages please join us if you are around.
People will tend to then arrange meet ups if they have similar aged children.