Is this a ‘Soft life’

[Wellthatwasabrupt]

And would you want it?

Has Dh, one young Dc and dogs, lives overseas by the beach and countryside, nice house with pool and sea views.
Works 6 hours per week from home. Does all drop offs and pick ups, food shop, dinners, majority to do with Dc and sorting bills. Has a cleaner.
Dh works Mon-Fri -finishes 4.30, no one works weekends.
Days are free based around Dc school drops, coffee with friends, Pilates, yoga, studying or reading if you like, watching Netflix all day if you like, shopping, beach, pool, garden

Would you call this a soft life? Would you like it, be honest?

Sounds idyllic, but without the kids please!

Couldn't agree more! Obviously we all need a means of survival, but we all want different things out of life and I think it's sad how jaded and cynical many people have become.

Sounds wonderful! Ideally I’d want to be close to friends as well, and within easy reach of a city, but if I really had that much time to fill with just as I pleased, it would not be a problem!

How many times do I have to say it is a reflective pronoun to people. Unfortunately now everyone seems to use it, even on the traitors, I loved that show until they got to the round table then said "I'm voting for yourself Daniel" ARRRRGHHHH

It sounds idyllic but I’d have fewer dogs and more kids.

I don’t really understand the soft life bit, but if they both like it, then what’s the issue? It wouldn’t be for me, but you just have to live your life the way you want. What other people do for work and leisure has no bearing on my life!

My dad was like this.

"Hello, is that Mr BarrelofBeer"
"I am he."

To be fair to him my dad was a salesman from 1952.

There is - “herself and her DH” is incorrect.

So many people use myself/yourself etc incorrectly.

It sounds great! but not forever. Do you have enough money for the future when your situation may be different.

Dog tax is a way of asking for a photo of the pooch. Ah typo, I wouldn’t want my husband working more hours than me, not for me.

What about the millions not in paid work either through non availability or incapacity. Do their lives have no meaning. The vast majority of working lives make no difference to the world or society whatsoever. Getting paid 200k to draft legal contracts for two multi nations to merge is not anymore meaningful than anything else. Staying late to meet deadlines, commuting, spending time with toxic colleagues, filling in spreadsheets with inputs and outputs. Then 40 years have gone. That's fine if that's what you value, but it's not intrinsically more valuable than what someone else values. I would say it's less, but that's just my view.

I would love a slightly tweaked version of this.

I’ll work one or two days, have four children (currently have three and would love one more but worry about diluting time with them), no pets, and be close to a city.

That would be perfect!

He gets a pass then :) My dad also answered the phone in quite bizarre ways (from today's perspective) back in the day - more along the lines of "Puddleton 352..." [break to listen] then "speak!" Really that was very rude...

Joe Blogs was more of an age to be the son of a salesman from 1952, so he did not get a pass.

I'd hate to have to organise my days around school hours and children. Far too rigid for me.

Depends how safe your future is.

Don't see how the day is free if there is shopping cooking and laundry to do

I used to think work was the be all and end all. But now I would happily not work to spend time with my kids. I dream about a lotto win so often 😂😂 sadly, financially it’s better for us both to be at work. We both work FT and have 5 kids, 3 are under the age of 3. Wouldn’t change our life but it’s nice to dream

@Wellthatwasabrupt is this you?
Has somebody criticised you? It will just be jealousy.

Well said!

Sounds like a dream life. 6 hours would be enough to keep me stimulated whilst raising a young child. I'd probably need more when DC got older but whilst young it would be absolutely perfect.

Well it is only the the dh who is actually working full time.

So a soft life for you op, yes

It is really odd. Their whole life must revolve around work. My friends and I talk very little about work. I like to switch off from work, I'd find it boring if work talk was a big part of my social life.

Sounds great to me! Life should be about what makes you happy, so those who think it's soft obviously are happier with a tougher life so that's fine for them.

I mean, raising children isn’t something you need to concentrate on 24/7.

Then again, raising children shouldn't be something that's shoehorned in around the rest of someone's oh-so-busy life. It should be a higher priority than that, imo anyway.

No, mainly because it sounds boring after more than a couple of weeks. Where’s the intellectual stimulation? I enjoy my professional life, I like being a subject matter expert and there’s a great freedom in being able to buy yourself what you want.

Also, she’s not setting a good example of a strong work ethic for the child.

Also, what happens if the husband dies, leaves, becomes abusive, becomes incapacitated, has an affair?

Also, retirement is expensive. She’s foolish not to save for old age.

To me this life sounds boring and annoying. I like to work and to feel the adrenaline of it and like I'm part of some big project or aim. I love spending time with my DD too but think I appreciate it more for the contrast with work. I am also not sporty or especially sociable so all those hobbies and all that time to get together with other people would sort of horrify me. I would also be surprised to find fellow geeks and metalheads living this life.

Sure, I'd like my kid to have loads of lovely activities and friends and personal parent time, but would that be growing up with really false expectations of life? It sounds a bit like living in a bubble.

And what country would this be? Is there much involvement with the local community and culture or is this an ivory tower gated 'ex pat living' sort of situation? How do the locals feel about a foreign family living it up with their swimming pool etc?

Don't get me wrong... having time to learn stuff and play with my kid loads and my own freaking swimming pool would be lovely perks. I guess it really helps you to reflect on what matters to you though and what would make life feel meaningful... or not.