What's something that men think is impressive, but really isn't?

[worldshottestmom]

Beep beep, come on traffic

Speaking of traffic, mine is when men (or boys, rather) rev their bloody engines on their cars that sound like they're about to explode. No, please, don't speed off, open the boot to your clapped out Corsa, I want to get in.

Also since going back to the gym, forgot how awful the men are there for showing off. There's this one in particular at my gym and idk if he's just mentally deranged or what but anytime he does any exercise he roars like a buffoon and I feel my vagina drying up a little more each time. It is so unnecessary. He will be easing his way through bicep curls, pretty much screaming and grunting for each one. Also has a horrifically embarassing habit of punching his chest, twice, every so often.

Give me your opinions and stories; what is something that men do that they think is impressive, but really, really isn't...

make my Saturday evening ✨

Oh yes. My famous mac and cheese. Apparently everyone who's ever tried it has been raving about it for years afterwards. I must have had COVID when I tasted it, because to me it was just flavoured cardboard.

The way they develop hyper specialist knowledge of a subject and then make that their personality. Like cant you just have a passing interest in something?

Yeah I'm on the fence with tattoos. I think they look OK on some men but not others. They have to have the aesthetic. I liked them less when I met a man who doesn't shut up about them and constantly shows them off, especially to me after I made the harrowing mistake of asking him "what does your tattoo say?". Was like an invite for him to harass me regarding his tattoos for the rest of my life. Definitely one that has filled the empty space where a personality should be, with tattoos. He's getting more, apparently!

Yes, this. And the ENDLESS MANSPLAINING 😖

Do you wear jeans when you're exercising?

Also, their "wild past".
Can't tell you how many times I (as someone with a multi-continent chequered past) has had to sit there and listen to a really animated story about this one summer a guy spent in Spain when he went surfing and slept with a Spanish girl. Rock n roll buddy.

Fuck, thisssss. Then act like you're stupid for not being a expert on it. I only have passing interests in things tbh

Men doing a splashy crawl in the slow lane when I'm doing my OAP very slow laps with my glasses on.

It’s talking about tattoos that is off putting. Dp has 3, they are great (though not ‘impressive’ as such).

A big cock. Maybe I'm weird but I'd say most women are not that keen on a big cock and more likely to find it uncomfortable during sex. I'd much rather have sex with someone who is good at oral sex or generally knows how to make me orgasm, which is definitely not going to be through a massive cock doing PIV.

😭 whoever this was, I hate them already

My ex was one of them pathetic weirdos who constantly referenced high school. Even worse is that he didn't even peak in high school. The amount of times I had to sit there and listen to the same fucking boring tales about them smoking weed in a field and fucking in the forest. "That's lovely dear" was pretty much my response

You beat me to it with sleeve tattoos. Neck ones like Peter Wicks’s ones are even worse.

My first boyfriend's Mum said his brother was a "real man" when she found out he'd got his girlfriend pregnant, who he'd only been seeing a few weeks! No! A "real man" would have used contraception so early in a relationship. Getting a woman pregnant is probably the easiest thing most men can do, and is in no way impressive. Being a proper partner and father in the longer term is FAR MORE impressive than a couple of minutes squirting! Needless to say, boyfriend's brother ran for the hills as soon as baby was born despite claiming he wanted to be a good "Dad", and his poor girlfriend had to chase him constantly for money he owed her and even remind him every year when it was his son's birthday etc!! His mother constantly thought he was a "real man" though - utterly deluded.

Definitely their penises. Mate, nobody wants a photo of that.

How they cook meat. BBQ or roast - so what? I can slam out a dinner for 6 in 35 minutes taking in ARFID, allergies, vegan and kosher and not leave the kitchen a bomb site. Your grilled chicken wings are not all that.

Catching fish.

Power tools. We can use them too. They literally take the effort out of a manual job.

Their 'seed'.
Absolutely not. It's a sperm, a tiny gamete. If it's a 'seed' then women are the soil. That's VERY MUCH not how it works.

How every young waitress or sales assistant they meet, without fail, supposedly guesses they're 20+ years younger than they actually are.

Breathing

From the likes of programmes such as Geordie shore, TOWIE, love island etc (not that I've seen any)...

False boobs
Fake tan
False eyelashes
Revealing every crevice and butt cheeks
No sense or knowledge of the world
An easy lay

???????

Oh man that and if you have ever had the displeasure of having a boy rap to you and he's an absolute abomination and is actually serious about it. dear sweet baby jesus its the stuff of nightmares

Yes to the films bit!!! Apparently I had no idea how great LOTR is, despite having watched it!! Told him it's not my thing, I don't really like fantasy, but lo and behold 3 hours later we've just watched it again and... it's still shit! sorry buddy.

Lmfao my abusive ex once said to me, after I refused to have sex with him, "well fuck being a housemaid then!" Because he had done the dishes, once, in an attempt to get me to sleep with him.

I'm physically cringing remembering it 😬

Oh god that was dh and his mums/nans famous pasta sauce.

It was just olive oil, garlic, passatta and mixed herbs.

He talked about it in front of his flatmates, said aren’t I amazing, isn’t my pasta sauce the best! They all nodded enthusiastically.
then one of the girls pulled me aside and said someone said it was just okay once and he had the hump for days, just go along with it and he shuts up.

I'm creasing hahahahaha

Right? Mate, I have eyes too.

Dick pics.

The first answer is spot on. It’s amazing how many crappy men have very high self esteem.

It must be incredibly common. My dad had his signature dish, and so did every husband I've had. Different recipes, I should add. The funny part is that, beyond that one masterpiece, they were completely hopeless in the kitchen.

I know of a Billy Big Bollocks who was a tory councillor who really rated himself, Ousted by a newbie wannabe Reform councillor. in that last local elections. Billy has somewhat shrunk in statue and looks like the pathetic, sad old git that he really is as a result.