AIBU? Husband and England football

[mumlearningtorun]

Am i being unreasonable?

my husband has turned around this morning and decided he’s going out to watch the football tonight with his friends, and staying out as it’s quite a long taxi journey to where his friends live, he’s decided to stay at his parents in their spare room as that’s where all his mates still live.

this has been sprung onto me & I have actually been looking forward to watching another game together, it’s been exciting, celebrating together etc

now I’m on my own? I feel a bit disappointed and I’ve now got the ump.

AIBU?

I don’t think you’re unreasonable OP I wonder how he would react if you planned to go out to watch it with your friends leaving him to watch alone with the kids in bed.

Also it annoys me when men know they can make plans to ditch their family because mom is the built-in-babysitter.

You’re a total twat and I’m really glad people are piling on this response.
my husband also works away but what OPs husband has done isn’t acceptable.
Well done you for having standards in the gutter!

Yanbu I'd be gutted I've been really enjoying watching the matches with my partner we even got up together to watch the 1am game. We've got some snacks and drinks in kids are in bed. Its just something fun to do together

This. I think it’s an awful disrespectful thing for him to do. We have the treats in for the evening and I can’t imagine either DH or myself ever doing that if the plan was to stay in together. And for those saying that if they get through OP can head out solo for the next match that to me is a horrible tit for tat way to live your life. Id hate to be carrying on like that.

I understand you feeling upset as he’s ditched you last minute and I would tell him so.

But as he usually watches it with you and has the chance to watch it with a mate then I’d be pleased for him and just arrange to go out with your friends next weekend

He's got some nerve springing this on you last minute. Disrespectful. Like others said, if England get through it's your turn next to go out with friends while he stays home.

Why should the OP's turn to go out with friends be contingent on what happens in the football?

Exactly this
Both of them enjoy the football
Both have been watching it together
Both have kids... but he gets to go out and assumes you won't?
Yanbu and beebee poster is a doormat that makes it harder for everyone else
I wouldn't have cared as I dont care about football. But even then I would expect partnership to kick in

I dont understand why the childcare problem is yours to sort out alone

Of course. These poor men being controlled by their wives. Their fun is the most important thing. 🙄

It's the World Cup.

You are being extremely unreasonable.

Do not join him with his mates.

Good point!

It’s not that she ‘can’t put the children to bed on her own’, it’s that she was looking forward to watching the match with her husband!! And wanting to spend time with your partner and feeling disappointed he’s left you out of his plans is ‘controlling’? And men with kids aren’t allowed to ‘have a life’ any more?

Fucking hell, did you just step off the good ship Handmaiden? Wait while the rest of us pipe you ashore with a 3-gun salute to your Backbone … 🙄

This!

Tell him that's fine and you will have everything crossed for England to make it through as you're now making plans to go out with your friends to watch the semi final.

Neither the op or her husband are playing in the World Cup, neither presumably is anyone they know. Are you able to explain why you think it’s ok for him to go out, which has the knock on effect of the op not being able to?

You don't understand football

@beebee25you are totally missing the point.
Of course he can go watch the match with friends, but: ask your spouse first as they will then have to stay at home. And as they normally watch together he should give her advanced warning ‘if England play Saturday I would like to go to the pub to watch’. And they either arrange childcare or his wife has time to organise a get together at her house.
The point is he didn’t ask, he told. He didn’t ask in advance, he sprung it on her last minute. He didn’t ask about the kids, he assumed she’d do it. It’s that this is the default in many if not most partnerships.

Tell him OK but if England get through its YOUR turn for a night out with your mates and he can be the SAHP

I didn’t ask whether I understood football or not.
I asked why in a house where both husband and wife enjoy football, you think it’s perfectly reasonable for the man to unilaterally decide in the morning only that he’s going out for the whole day to watch the match with friends knowing that that leaves his wife stuck home alone to watch it? Are you able to articulate why that’s a reasonable thing to do? (And note - ‘you don’t understand football’ doesn’t achieve that)

nah,nah,nah

@CinnamonJellyBeans can you only enjoy watching football if you have a penis?

Sssshhh, it's started

YANBU.

He’s being unreasonable for springing it on you that he’s going out and staying out all night. No discussion. Also denying you watching it together. I assume he knows that you’ve been enjoying watching matches together?

Even without the benefit of a penis I have noticed it has started @CinnamonJellyBeans