AIBU? Husband and England football

[mumlearningtorun]

Am i being unreasonable?

my husband has turned around this morning and decided he’s going out to watch the football tonight with his friends, and staying out as it’s quite a long taxi journey to where his friends live, he’s decided to stay at his parents in their spare room as that’s where all his mates still live.

this has been sprung onto me & I have actually been looking forward to watching another game together, it’s been exciting, celebrating together etc

now I’m on my own? I feel a bit disappointed and I’ve now got the ump.

AIBU?

He's an arse. Definitely join us on the watchalong thread!

👍🏻

Funny how he didn't have a thought for arranging childcare and just assumed OP would be at home to look after the kids

Tell him he needs to be home by 12 noon tomorrow as you’re heading out to meet friends for a swim at an outdoor pool and a meal after. “I must have forgotten to mention it. Soz”.

This seems fair! Put it to him and gauge the rewponse. Actually, why not say you intend dto be out watching the final - whoever gets through!! Alternatively, could the mates not come round to yours so you both get to have company plus share any child wake-ups?

Exactly the response I was going to post, and the phrase “I just got on with it” absolutely enrages me and it’s ALWAYS women telling women to “get on with it” whilst men continue with their lives exactly as they wish!

I think it's a shitty assumption that he will just be going out and you'll be doing the childcare TBF.

Both football fans, it's a huge match and the man gets to go and watch it with his mates 🤣

I'm sure he will enjoy with his mates... 🙄

Have you said to him you feel abandoned?

Absolutely NOT ok. And YOU are out for dinner from 5pm tomorrow.

Yet another man who forgets he has children

Why do they get the football pass?

I am the football fan in this house. But wouldn’t unilaterally decide I was going out (especially when DC were small) without any discussion.

Now DS is living away we both stayed up for the last England match and messaged each other via WhatsApp whilst our respective partners slept. It was really lovely having that connection during the match

Are women supposed to enjoy those things? Then say Soz.
Why can't they enjoy the football? Why can't they go down pub and enjoy the football?
I could, thankfully single with adult children... I cannot be arsed with the crowds and the expense so will be watching from home.
I like swimming, I like eating... I can do these things any time.

I’d be annoyed too, especially if he was drinking heavily and turned up worse for wear at midday the next day and refused to help out with the kids because of a hangover. Is that likely, OP?

I'd be annoyed and told him it wasn't happening because we don't just throw last minute plans on each other.

Since it seems to be going ahead, make it clear that if England win, it is your turn next time and make sure you head out and the most awkward time as well.

Celebrating together..bit presumptuous?
Mon the Noggies.
Guess where in the UK Im from ?

I'm only teasing🙋

Excuse the spelling..10 Corona in

That’s rubbish of him. I don’t blame you being annoyed. I hope that you can make plans to go out and watch the next game with friends, leaving him home alone to watch, assuming we get that far?

You don’t think it is unreasonable that he just announced to OP he’s going out and staying out. What would happen if OP countered and said actually I had arranged to go out with friends? Who would get priority? Bet you would think the man should.

YANBU. My DH is going out to watch it - I’ll be in bed, and wouldn’t be watching it with him even if he was home. But he didn’t just announce it. He asked me. Not in a “I need permission” kind of way, but because neither of us just tell the other person “I’m going out, you’re looking after the DC, it’s all arranged”.

This ^

This is mean. Couldn’t he have found you both a babysitter?

His Mum's right. He can't use hers for convienience and go straight out without "visiting" first. It's just a shame he can't show his wife the same level of courtesy.

Surely the default plan is always to share the responsibility of 2 young kids at bedtime? Any other plans need to be discussed, unless it’s a regular ‘you have Friday, I have Saturday’ thing. I don’t think it’s fair that he thought there wasn’t a plan… the default plan is to stay in and since the match is on, watch together.

Ew.