to think a male pill would be one of the best things that could happen to society?

[ZoeCM]

A massive number of society's problems are caused by absent or bad fathers. Imagine if, before a baby was conceived, a man had to consciously think, "I want to have a child with this woman, so I'll come off the pill." Not just "I want to have sex, this woman is willing, and it'll be less enjoyable if we use a condom."

Of course, it wouldn't be a panacea. There would still sadly be men who choose to come off the pill but are bad fathers anyway, or decide once the reality of parenthood sets in that they can't be bothered. And there would also be men who just don't bother to take the pill properly and are then shocked when the woman gets pregnant. But on balance, if there were a way for men to have condom-free sex without potentially having to pay for a child for eighteen years afterwards, a lot of them would be downright religious in their use of it.

I'm genuinely intrigued to see if anyone disagrees with this. I can't see any downside.

Would you trust a man who said "No need for a condom, I'm on the pill"?

Why do you think people might disagree?

Why do you think condom free sex is preferable? They protect each person from STD’s as well as pregnancy

The issue is trust. The consequences are more significant for the woman - I’d have to be in a very serious relationship before I trusted a man to take this. Not because I necessarily think they’re untrustworthy, just that the stakes are so high.

I’d trust DH, he doesn’t want more children, and is reliable at taking another daily medication so could take them together. He’s had a vasectomy so it’s moot but in theory I would trust him.

I'm sure they did trials a while back which were stopped because of the reported side effects (acne, mood swings, weight gain, change in sex drive...you know the stuff women put up with anyway).

Don’t women have the same choice?

My DH has ADHD, so in the time before he was medicated, I wouldn't have trusted him to take it and, TBF, he wouldn't have trusted himself!

While I’m the one who runs the risk of getting pregnant no way would I take it on trust that a man is taking a contraceptive pill.

I would trust my DH to take a pill, but if in theory I was dating I wouldn't take any man's word that he was taking the pill. Even if he felt he was doing it right, I wouldn't be confident that he was, after all the consequences fall on me not him.

It's a good idea in theory but in practice I think there would be very little uptake from men. They are too self centred to put themselves out in this way.

I love the idea of a pill for men, especially in cases where they don’t want kids or a vasectomy. However, I still think women are responsible for their own contraception if they also don’t want kids. I think men would be more likely to miss days with the pill as they aren’t the ones who get pregnant.

I appreciate the point you’re making. But the issue is the ethics of putting someone through the side effects for the medical benefit of another person. The side effects for women are balanced against the risks of pregnancy eg the pill increases the risk of blood clots, but pregnancy increases the risk even more.
For men, they’d get medical risk with no medical benefit.

The human race would be over.

I doubt men would suddenly willingly take up a male contraceptive pill. They are used to abdicating responsibility to women. From what I understand only a few men even bother to carry condoms. Again this is left to women.

I don't think the idea is that the male pill is instead of female contraception-it would be a good addition to what's already available... belt and braces, so to speak.

Why wouldn’t women take the pill if they don’t want to get pregnant?

If men don’t want a baby, many seem to waltz away Scott free anyway so they hardly need a pill to avoid the consequences of a pregnancy.

I agree with pp that condoms protect against STDs so they should be used.
If men go down the contraception route I think a implant would be better , they don't have to remember to take the pill and could get a letter of proof from the docs. ( tho I guess they could be forged )

I wonder if something similar to the coil would work for them .

Obviously there are a fair few very valid reasons why a woman might not ‘take the pill’, asides from the fact that not everyone medically can.

It wouldn't. Who'd trust them?

Surely that's a question for the men reluctant to wear them, because they prioritise their pleasure in the moment?

What if it were your own husband and neither of you wanted to have a baby? Would you not trust him either?

I think a male pill would be a great thing.

No, I wouldn’t trust a man to take it, and so I would also use contraception.

Yes, it would give a man an additional option along with condoms or vasectomy.

I know several men who would use it properly because they don’t want a baby. At the moment they are trusting condoms, with a high failure rate, and the word of their partner re the female pill. They would love the option of a non-permanent method to replace or use alongside barrier methods.

A new option doesn’t have to replace what we already have. It adds another option!

I would never trust a man to take the pill and I don’t think it would lead to massive numbers of men being more responsible .

Actually that’s a lie. I would trust a committed partner. Not a random though.

I’d like to see an implant. I still think condoms should be used as well, but in a long term serious relationship, or even if a man is screwing around and not being careful (e.g. drunken shags), it definitely has its uses.

I'd be well chuffed if there was a pill I could take!

DD turned up 11 months into mine and DPs relationship, despite her being on the pill and us using condoms. While it's all turned out well 18 years later, it really wasn't the plan at the time, both DP and I were planning on being child free!

It's always been a low level fear ever since that it could happen again, so it would really put my mind at ease to have an additional form of contraception that I'm in full control of.

Obviously it shouldn't be a replacement for condoms in a new relationship, any more than female contraception is, as a pill isn't going to reduce the risk of STIs. I do think that some men would try and use it to pressure women into not using condoms, but they're likely the same men who do so now and say "I'll just pull out" or "But you're on the pill"