Help end medical misogyny. Sign our petition.

Help end medical misogyny.
Sign our petition.

Sign the petition

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think the younger MN generation would be shocked at things we did decades ago...

420 replies

Allonthesametrain · 03/07/2026 21:59

It was such a different time, before the days of hand gel, smartphones, ordering online, house cctv, awareness etc.

This is from a background of a good home with values, DF worked hard, DM did everything for us 3 DC and also worked early before we got up and during school hours when we of that age.

Things we would do...

All 3 have a bath together every night when young, also go into after bath DF or DM.

Most clothes were hand me downs/passed on from friends and neighbours and anything new was for a special occasion.

If we wanted anything special we had to wait until Christmas or birthdays and were delighted and grateful

Lucky to have a house phone, it was in the hall way so no privacy and a shout how long are you going to be on there if you rang out

Bedrooms were sparse, we put colour on our walls with posters we got from magazines

Fun time meeting your friends, on foot or bikes, roller boots, usually at the school you've been at all day because it was known and had no big fences around it.

We collected tapes, later CDs, which we listened to over again and had to rewind, also recorded from friends on a double deck

Recorded our favourite songs from the radio, had to pause before next one to not include the DJ's blitherings

Young teens, oldest looking member of group bought a couple of 2L cheapest cider, we all drank from

Pubs, rarely enough loo roll, we never thought to bring our own, wipe by hand or drip dry

Need a wee, you went anywhere

You walked to meet your friends then walked/staggered back, split up on way to walk on your own as girls

You didn't dare argue with a teacher, even when it was unfair as a good student

If you went to university it was a shared bathroom and kitchen between 12, one tine fridge, old pans. Then when you moved out to house share the furniture was from the 1940s, mattresses had springs sticking out, slugs were a normal practice to put outside.

You qualify, get your own first flat, most basic furnished, the slug relatives are there, you still have to go to the laundrette as no washing machine. Single glazing, you put your own film up to help.

This was if lucky, friends from less privileged areas and backgrounds were left to roam, hungry, sniffed glue, caused chaos, were always dirty, same clothes every day. When 'naughty' they were beaten by their parents and disrespected, often hit by teachers.

Things have progressed so much but there are still many living this life within their homes.

So, with the observation of MN posts about things like should I be upset about DC not being offered his favourite food at lunch time just seems so trivial compared to the reality of us as older parents.

Are younger parents picking arguments about what could be deemed as insignificant just because they can now on SM?

Yeah, I know, I will seem as a dinosaur, but Im not. Basic values need to come from home, which we as gen X experienced growing up. When you're a young child and all you know is instant gratification from screens then this is their norm, then going forward their DC. Not saying all parents do this, of course not, but sadly many do.

My point? Oh yes, growing up in harsher times, which wasn't ideal at all but it was what it was and now we appreciate the positives of now, but without knowing what it was like before is it difficult to appreciate and not succumb to a lazier way of parenting?

OP posts:
Nervousb2b · 04/07/2026 19:16

I've heard of quite a few of these "norms" from way back when, but never until now had I heard about the normality of wiping your arse with your hand due to a lack of resources.

Every day is a school day...

Gemilo · 04/07/2026 19:25

There are some songs I listen to that just don't sound right without 'Capital Radiooo' at the end of them. Thanks for the post. Brought back memories.

MrsPapillon · 04/07/2026 19:34

MumsTheWordYouKnow · 04/07/2026 18:33

You don’t know Monty Python then, nothing to do with mocking anyone, it’s joke about who had it worse. Too young to have heard of it I assume.

I do know Monty Python, I know the sketch. But I still think it’s out of order when privileged people use it to mock those who are recounting their childhood experiences.

TheCraftySquid · 04/07/2026 19:35

I was born late 70’s into a working class family up north. I don’t recognise anything from Gen X in what you’ve posted, so can only assume you were a post war baby. My parents all shared baths (tin bath in front of the coal fire) with their siblings - eldest first. Toilet paper, was old newspapers and the toilet was outside. I just about remember my grandma’s outside loo but shortly after she got a bathroom inside. I remember her getting a colour TV and she was featured in the local paper 😆

TheLobsterClub · 04/07/2026 19:40

I was born at the end of 1985 and my parents still didn't have a house phone... which led to both me and my mum almost dying when I decided to make a very premature entrance into the world. My dad tried to use the neighbour's phone to call an ambulance but they didn't wake up so he had to run round the corner to my grandparents....

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 19:45

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 00:39

Same memories from my parents and GPs when they were here. The toilet was down in the yard, potty bowls under the beds, which I also had staying over.

I was speaking about my time, did have an inside bathroom, but relatives didn't so yes we did we did use chamber pots at night. Xx

My DPs and GPs told us what life was like, it really was harsh, even more so for generations before.

Tin bath once a week, toilet down garden, running behind coal trucks to try to get a few dropped pieces, one coal fire to heat up house, no running hot water, absolutely no telephone or TV til later, hot brick in bed in winter, walking miles to get to school etc. Xx

OP posts:
Morepositivemum · 04/07/2026 19:46

The toilet thing- we went where we went? Not in the 80s- I went at home!!!

I honestly think life is harder now- jobs, houses, col crisis, people being told eg dairy is bad for you so more diseases that weren’t seen in years, bloody phones and social media, girls and boys being pitted against each other so everyone is annoyed and angry, so much loneliness, anxiety and depression and all the people saying ‘oh they’re so spoilt!!’

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 19:55

PrettyPickle · 04/07/2026 00:40

In the school holidays my mum would kick me out after breakfast and at tea time, there would be a chorus of mums screaming for their kids to come home for tea and you were always able to correctly identify your own mum amongst them.

I don't ever remember going out for a meal, unless to a family members as a kid. Nearest thing was on a Friday it was fish and chip night. Adults got fish and chips and being in Yorkshire, the kids got a fishcake and some of mum and dads chips. It was a rite of passage that when you hit your mid teens you were allowed fish too.

The school playground was made out of dense tarmac or concrete and the metal roundabout whizzed around as fast as we could manage, jet propelling us out onto the tarmac with a thud. The scrapes on your knees were massive and you just pulled your white socks up and clambered back on the roundabout. There was none of the bouncy rubber stuff to land on.

An the 5 second rule for food that landed on the floor was more like a 5 hr rule, you picked it up, sniffed it, blew off any dirt and chomped away.

There were no seatbelts in cars, I can remember my dad speeding down a motor way and me leaning on the door and it opening. My brother grabbed the back of my dungarees and clung on for day life until my Dad could pull in and lecture me.

And at school we didn't have proper toilet roll, it was Izal tracing paper type stuff. It didn't wipe your bum, it slid down it.

We had the early form of recycling. My grandad had an outhouse with an outside loo, he used to tear up his newspapers and keep them on string to be used as toilet roll and you ended up with ink all over your bum. Or the old newspapers went to the fish and chip shop and they dished your fish and chips up on them! Urgh and I think now about all the men who used to read their newspaper when they were sat on the loo.

If you bought a large bottle of pop/beer or whatever, when you took the empties back to the shop, you got twopence for returning it.

Milk was delivered on the doorstep and the clean empty bottles were left on the door step to be collected cleaned and used again.

Oh and we had a party line on our phone, only way we could have one. We knew way too much about our neighbours business.

Big old TV in front room, you had to wait 5 minutes for it to warm up and start, it was as big as a current dishwasher, me and my brother were the remote control. Brother had a portable TV in his room (we were posh) as a teenager and every time it got windy outside you hade to keep moving the aerial on top of the TV to get reception.

Mum used hairspray that smelt like fly killer and set her hair like concrete. It smelt like flykiller because it was. Any fly that happened in the direction of my mums hair would be stuck in the sticky goo that was hairspray. Her hair was set solid for the week and never budged.

Sanitary towels came with a sanitary belt to keep them in place. If you didn't get it right the towel bobbled out of the waistband of your skirt like a bunnys tail.

aaah them were the days!

Absolutely all true! What was the party line? I have a vague recollection but can't remember.

In the 1970s, one party dress; long brown skirt and zig zag top, loved it!

Oh takeaways...now that was a treat! Usually fish n chips and Chinese, delicious 😋

OP posts:
Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 19:58

MaidOfSteel · 04/07/2026 00:52

I often shared a bath with my sister in the 70s. Either that or my mother would get in after me.
My grandparents rented their black & white telly, can’t remember if it was from Rediffusion or Radio Rentals.
And house phones were rented from whatever BT used to be called. The name escapes me!
We had a twin tub washer/spinner and the oven had a grill up at eye level. And we had a proper old fashioned chip pan.
We had to get up to change the tv channel.
We thought nothing of going off with our mates for hours, just wandering. And we had a 2 hour youth club in a Sunday afternoon.
My mother always told me how much she hated having to wash terry towelling nappies!

Im so very happy that I grew up before the advent of home computers and all this technology kids have now. I was nearly 30 when I got my first mobile and there was no social media to crush our spirits. I wouldn’t swap with the kids of today.

Yes, renting a TV and video when I was in my teens was a whole new world! I didn't think technology go any further than that.

OP posts:
Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 20:01

Oblahdeeoblahdoe · 04/07/2026 00:41

My DH were reminiscing the other day as our DGD was 15. When we were her ages we were drinking in pubs and smoking! Seems bonkers now

Indeed! Smoking everywhere, it was the norm.

OP posts:
Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 20:03

SixtySomething · 04/07/2026 01:02

I was born a few years before you.The children definitely shared a bath, not the adults.

I'm a few years younger than you and it was us children who shared baths, not adults, but we would get in after parents sometimes.

OP posts:
MrsPapillon · 04/07/2026 20:06

I honestly think life is harder now- jobs, houses, col crisis, people being told eg dairy is bad for you so more diseases that weren’t seen in years, bloody phones and social media, girls and boys being pitted against each other so everyone is annoyed and angry, so much loneliness, anxiety and depression and all the people saying ‘oh they’re so spoilt!!’

I think that in some ways life is easier now in terms of labour saving devices, online shopping/banking and a higher standard of living (new cars, holidays etc) but I think overall life is worse now. I think humans haven’t adapted to live in the kind of society we’re living in. Life is too complex and pressured and the pay off for the shiny new things is too great. I’d love to go back to pre-internet times.

MumsTheWordYouKnow · 04/07/2026 20:06

MrsPapillon · 04/07/2026 19:34

I do know Monty Python, I know the sketch. But I still think it’s out of order when privileged people use it to mock those who are recounting their childhood experiences.

I don’t think anyone was doing that. And I don’t think anyone on this thread was what we’d call genuinely hard up (from what I’ve read anyway)

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 20:06

SunnyWarrington · 04/07/2026 00:57

I was born in ‘74 - most of the OP resonates with me growing up rurally in the UK. My childminder was the only person on her street with a phone, and she installed a coin op pay phone cos all her neighbours would ask to borrow it.
Some winters the pipes froze to the house, so all our water came in 5 gallon drums that we filled in the school yard - baths were definitely shared when all your hot water had to be boiled in a saucepan!

Sorry if this sounded muddled, I was paragraphing the changes. In the 70s it was records, 80s tapes and 90s CDs. Xx

OP posts:
Bundtbake · 04/07/2026 20:06

My dad had a Bedford van, my siblings and I sat on paint cans in the back!!
I was born in 1956.

ThesebeautifulthingsthatIvegot · 04/07/2026 20:08

shockmethen · 03/07/2026 22:05

Op how old are you? We certainly didn’t share baths. We showered or bathed daily by ourselves. My clothes were not hand me downs. Everyone had a house phone. I was born in ‘67

I was a 90s baby and had shared baths and hand me downs, playing out, drinking cider in the park, taping songs off the radio etc. etc.

To be honest, I didn't see much in the OP that was unfamiliar except the weird stuff about loo roll.

Perhaps it's a sign that life isn't the same for everyone born at the same time...

PenelopeJoanSterling · 04/07/2026 20:11

FullLondonEye · 03/07/2026 22:11

Ah yes. What a shame my daughters don't get to experience rape being legal within marriage. Not feeling able to report domestic violence or child abuse because it was 'normal'. Having to put up with sexist misogynist creeps at work because there were no laws against that then. Not being given the same opportunities at work as men. Being told it was their fault if they got raped while wearing a short skirt. Good times.

I hope my daughters would be very shocked at how shit things often were then, particularly for women.

some of those still exist today unfortunally

ARunByFruiting · 04/07/2026 20:12

It always puzzles me when "gen x" moan about kids/teens because they are the parents of these (probably more) teens nowadays. I had mine in the mid/late 2000s as a fairly young mum and the majority of parents my dc went to school with were all gen x. So the teens/early 20s people gen x complain about are the product of their own parenting 🤔

PenelopeJoanSterling · 04/07/2026 20:13

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 19:58

Yes, renting a TV and video when I was in my teens was a whole new world! I didn't think technology go any further than that.

wandering blockbusters reading the dvds' videos to understand the film

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 20:13

SquirrelGG · 04/07/2026 01:10

It's also disingenuous to think that a lot of bad stuff still isn't happening behind closed doors, even in this so called enlightened age. You only need to read a few threads on MN to see just what a lot of women are still putting up with. Neither era was/is perfect, that's just life.

I know and wasn't saying it was all great, in fact, how much harder it was and how small things like treats made a huge impact.

There was so much horror and unfairness but this isn't what the thread is about. X

OP posts:
Horses7 · 04/07/2026 20:15

Bundtbake · 04/07/2026 20:06

My dad had a Bedford van, my siblings and I sat on paint cans in the back!!
I was born in 1956.

In early 70s my BF now H’s dad had a 3 wheeler Del Boy Trotter type van we did a 75 mile trip sat on paint tins in the back (and on return trip) .. .. funny that you did too.
So dangerous!!

Allseeingallknowing · 04/07/2026 20:16

Born in 1947
Chamber pots
Freezing bedrooms
Coal fire, no other heating
No fridge until age 16. Frequently ate food that was “off”
Washing machine with mangle/ twin tub if you were better off
Clothes from jumble sale or hand me downs
No holidays, perhaps a day trip to the seaside once a year
No TV until age 11
Very few benefits. If you were hungry or homeless-tough!

Allonthesametrain · 04/07/2026 20:20

TheIdlerReturns · 04/07/2026 13:20

@Allonthesametrain "need a wee, you went anywhere". Love this. Reminds me of a David Bowie concert I went to at Milton Keynes Bowl. There's a long queue of women and girls forming a line down a muddy field next to a line of stinky portacabins that are the toilets. They're waiting forever. Behind this is a dense wood. You can probably guess where I went to the toilet.

Lol of course, why wait! Xx

OP posts:
Squeezedplesse · 04/07/2026 20:20

Ha ha @PetulaGordeno I used to climb out of my bedroom window to go to the pub and gigs too! Early eighties,saw Japan, Human League, and lots of other obscure bands in pubs in the town centre, I even dated the guitarist in one at 15! Jesus horrific really,but it was what it was.

RedToothBrush · 04/07/2026 20:25

MumsTheWordYouKnow · 04/07/2026 18:17

Wow, looked that up. I remember it coming in when I was 9 to wear them in the front and didn’t realise it became law for seats in the back in 1991! Shocking stuff!!

Exactly! And there was then a couple of years when people openly flouted the law before it became completely taboo to do.

My friend's sister was definitely still letting us do it until about 1994!

She smoked and was definitely someone who didn't follow the rules...

Swipe left for the next trending thread