To think the younger MN generation would be shocked at things we did decades ago...

[Allonthesametrain]

It was such a different time, before the days of hand gel, smartphones, ordering online, house cctv, awareness etc.

This is from a background of a good home with values, DF worked hard, DM did everything for us 3 DC and also worked early before we got up and during school hours when we of that age.

Things we would do...

All 3 have a bath together every night when young, also go into after bath DF or DM.

Most clothes were hand me downs/passed on from friends and neighbours and anything new was for a special occasion.

If we wanted anything special we had to wait until Christmas or birthdays and were delighted and grateful

Lucky to have a house phone, it was in the hall way so no privacy and a shout how long are you going to be on there if you rang out

Bedrooms were sparse, we put colour on our walls with posters we got from magazines

Fun time meeting your friends, on foot or bikes, roller boots, usually at the school you've been at all day because it was known and had no big fences around it.

We collected tapes, later CDs, which we listened to over again and had to rewind, also recorded from friends on a double deck

Recorded our favourite songs from the radio, had to pause before next one to not include the DJ's blitherings

Young teens, oldest looking member of group bought a couple of 2L cheapest cider, we all drank from

Pubs, rarely enough loo roll, we never thought to bring our own, wipe by hand or drip dry

Need a wee, you went anywhere

You walked to meet your friends then walked/staggered back, split up on way to walk on your own as girls

You didn't dare argue with a teacher, even when it was unfair as a good student

If you went to university it was a shared bathroom and kitchen between 12, one tine fridge, old pans. Then when you moved out to house share the furniture was from the 1940s, mattresses had springs sticking out, slugs were a normal practice to put outside.

You qualify, get your own first flat, most basic furnished, the slug relatives are there, you still have to go to the laundrette as no washing machine. Single glazing, you put your own film up to help.

This was if lucky, friends from less privileged areas and backgrounds were left to roam, hungry, sniffed glue, caused chaos, were always dirty, same clothes every day. When 'naughty' they were beaten by their parents and disrespected, often hit by teachers.

Things have progressed so much but there are still many living this life within their homes.

So, with the observation of MN posts about things like should I be upset about DC not being offered his favourite food at lunch time just seems so trivial compared to the reality of us as older parents.

Are younger parents picking arguments about what could be deemed as insignificant just because they can now on SM?

Yeah, I know, I will seem as a dinosaur, but Im not. Basic values need to come from home, which we as gen X experienced growing up. When you're a young child and all you know is instant gratification from screens then this is their norm, then going forward their DC. Not saying all parents do this, of course not, but sadly many do.

My point? Oh yes, growing up in harsher times, which wasn't ideal at all but it was what it was and now we appreciate the positives of now, but without knowing what it was like before is it difficult to appreciate and not succumb to a lazier way of parenting?

I was little in the late 60s I remember my big sister sitting at a sewing machine making her own clothes for her next dance night. She was stunning.
I remember the hedgerows just out the road wild berries, stunning rhododendron in full bloom, honeysuckle, primrose , snowdrops and bluebells and the smell of the farm at composting season. I could go on.
These lanes, paths and small roads have been replaced by miles and miles of housing developments with out of town shopping. So many cars.
I remember the great old days in this way.

I was born in 66 and recognise most of what the OP posts with the exception of all clothing being second hand and the pub thing. I was an army brat and grew up abroad, mostly in Germany from age 4 to 11. We roamed miles from home on our bikes and had loads of freedom. Out most of the day very day. No snacking for us and we drank from the local river which was infested with rats. Good times, We had a phone as a teen, was back in Blighty at that point. Wasn’t allowed to use it without permission and for no longer than a couple of minutes, phone calls were very expensive. Shared baths were the usual when I was a small child

Stupid comment. But I did walk to school, which was about 30 mins away from home in the snow, in my wellies, with polythene bags over my socks, to keep my feet dry.

And boil hankies,

I don’t think we are romanticising it at all. Just reminiscing.
this thread had made me feel happy

My grandchildren are fascinated by my accounts of what my life was like as a child, as it's so very different from theirs.

One of things they find hard to believe is how much freedom my generation had. I grew up in the 1960s, when it was the norm for children to be out on their own for hours at a time. I used to enjoy walking in the countryside on my own (I still do!) from the age of 6 or 7. We lived in a new housing estate at the edge of the town, so the countryside was just a couple of streets away.
At age 8 I became responsible for taking my 5-year-old sister to school, which was about three quarters of a mile away.

Corporal punishment was accepted as normal at my school and at home. Teachers used to hit us on the head with books or a ruler, throw a wooden blackboard rubber at us, throw chalk, hit us with plimsolls and canes. Some canings took place on the stage during assembly, in front of the whole school. I remember a boy getting publicly caned for being late arriving at school 3 times in the same week (if you were late you got a "black mark" in the register. Too many black marks and the cane was welded. We were 5 years old. I was terrified of the teachers, especially the male ones.

From the age of 13, I used to earn money by babysitting in the evenings. I put a postcard advertising my services in the local post office and on the notice board in the local newsagent. I knew nothing about babies and had no experience. Nonetheless, total strangers used to phone me up and arrange for me to babysit their babies and children. My dad used to give me a lift to get to wherever it was and the other family's dad used to give me a lift home when they got home. I was paid 25p per hour.

You had a hole? You posh bitch! We used to sit around longing for a hole in the road. Check your privilege. 😃

Most houses didn't have showers when I was growing up.
I was born in 1958 and left school in 1977.

And it was so much better in the olden days? I'm bloody glad my kids had decent shoes to walk to school in.

Luxury!
😁

🤣🤣🤣

Every generation can find something good and something bad from the one that went before.

I see many positives compared to how I grew up:
better emotional literacy - I was emotionally neglected, and this was very common in the 70a and 80s.
much better society for gay people
racial prejudice less acceptable
less pressure for women to get married and pop out kids
more equality in the workplace
women accepted to have agency
much more opportunity for skilled trades to make a LOT of money

negatives:
far too much time inside, not enough exercise
too much processed food
much too much instant gratification and children being spoiled with material shite
still a massive social mobility problem
the renewed acceptability of racist discourse in politics and the media
the increasing sophistication of political propaganda using bot farms, social media manipulation, and the concentration of political power in the hands of press bodies like Daily Mail, GB news, etc.

I was born in 72 and although I recognise most of what you said, I find these sorts of posts very cringe-worthy. I had my DS's in 02 and 04 and I don't think that much has changed since then except for not having a digital camera in 02. We were still pretty obsessive about doing things correctly and I've always been very over-protective. Kids still had far too much screen time (something I regret introducing). ExH was still glued to his phone when the kids were little.

This is from a background of a good home with values, DF worked hard, DM did everything for us 3 DC

Well this was ostensibly our house too, but those same values meant beating us for any perceived infraction (which actually just meant if they were in a bad mood) because spare the rod blah blah, and also that my father got to do absolutely fuck all around the house while my mother worked out of the house but then came home to put in another shift at work because traditional values meant men didn't change the nappies or do any childcare, housework, shopping etc... Homophobia, racism, misogyny were unfortunately too often part of those same values. I would like to see my children have some of the freedom I took for granted then but I am really glad they don't live in the 'good home with values' of that time.

In some ways they weren't better, but I can assure you that in many ways they were. I am so grateful I grew up when I did and not now. We have so many improvements now, which is great, but there is also a lot which is much worse.

Ah yes you swept chimneys, walked 20 miles to school in the snow with no shoes and drank from a hose whilst shitting in a communal hole at the end of the road. I understand - sincerely a Gen Z

I recognise it all I grew up in South East London. there was never any loo roll in pubs we wiped with whatever we could x

Born same year and definitely did share a bath with my siblings!

Kids are far too soft these days with their soft loo roll and not squares of newspaper to wipe their arses. No wonder they are all such snowflakes with lazy parents.

However, that is just your experience. My home life wasn't like that at all. My father probably didn't do a lot of housework (although in later life when he lived alone he was much better at it than I am!) , but he did much of the outside work (we lived on a quarter acre section, common here at that time), plus worked full time while Mum only worked part time. I certainly wasn't beaten for any perceived infraction. I had a fantastic childhood and wouldn't swap it for the life of a child today.

I totally get this. I’m 46! I grew up in the country. We moved our kids to the coast 2 years ago to get away from the standard kid experience now. Nope, I’d definitely not allow my kids to do what I did (tbf my parents probably wouldn’t have allowed me either) but they get to play outside and take a walk to the beach. We paddle board/snorkle/boating.

we’ve made sacrifices for a more simple life but i prepared for that by working my (and my exh) ass off in our 20’s to be financially secure.

we didn’t have kids until ours 30’s once we’d secured our housing, pensions, career….

we live a very simple life now but we do have a big house by the sea.

we grow our own veg and installed a woodburner to heat the house using free wood (pallets)

our kids are 9&10, they know how to cook and also have their own savings accounts for their future mortgage.

btw, I was brought up in a council estate so I’m not from money. My parents were grafters and taught me that.

oh…. And we share bath water!!!! <shock> 😂

We had top of the pops! We had great music. We had great fashion. I remember playing out after school every day in nice weather, kids knocking on the door to ask ‘ can you come out?’ And skipping in the street with someone’s washing line, playing hopscotch. Playing records on repeat. Listening to singles in booths on a Saturday in the record shop. going to the shop and buying Bunty or Jackie and fruit salad chews, black jacks, cola cubes, pineapple chunks, cream soda and a Topic, and nobody ever mentioning ‘ too much sugar’… ever. I remember watching Crossroads, just because it was on. Why was Sandy in a wheelchair, I didn’t know, but I was lying in the floor in front of the gas fire watching telly, just because it was on. Bored, never. Choice? What’s that?
we didn’t have a phone till I was 14. It was a trimphone.. remember those? And youd answer it by saying your number! Usually have to wait till the pips had gone to find out it was gran phoning!

I'm aware it wasn't every household but it was also far too common. Why do you think we had to bring in a law about rape within marriage? Or that we still have to moan about a gender pay gap? If it was all so great back then, we wouldn't have changed everything so much. Ultimately some people have a better and easier time at home with their parents now the same as then, just as it's always been. I'd fucking love to see my children playing out more and in front of screens less but I think it's disingenous to compare the eras in this way without removing the rose tinted glasses.

Your life sounds great although I’ll leave the shared bath water 😂

Outside toilet with squares of newspaper hanging from a nail on the inside of the toilet door.