AIBU to think my daughter cannot afford this holiday abroad?

[ThisTealLeader]

Daughter (18) has booked a holiday with friends abroad, didn’t tell us the full amount and then lied about how much spending money she has. They are going bed and breakfast. She will have less than £200 spending money for a week’s holiday. She has used savings to pay for the holiday.
She is saying that her friend will be lending her money if she falls short, which she will I am sure.
My point is she is not being sensible with her money. She only works one day a week and so she cannot actually afford it and hasn’t thought it through.
I think she needs to cancel as it is irresponsible in my opinion to be going abroad with no backup. As far as I am aware she hasn’t booked travel insurance and is reluctant to do so as this will eat into her spending money.
Would like people’s thoughts on this?

And when the destination airport asks her to prove she has £1200 in the bank? Because I've been asked this year on the biometric system!

No, go fund me’s are people who didn’t bother getting insurance.

One of the reason’s there is cheap insurance for healthy people is because millions of people travel every year and only a small percentage ever need to claim. As long as the insurance has a decent limit, not too high an excess and covers medical and accidents etc then it’s fine - and you can get that for very little money when you’re young and healthy.

I get what you’re saying OP and it definitely feels like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. If it was me I’d buy DD travel insurance that’s a non negotiable really. I wouldn’t offer any money at the start, she does need to learn to budget but equally I don’t think I could let my DC suffer so if it came to it I’d likely transfer them a small amount each day once they’ve run out to enable them to get basic food.

Help her with the insurance, pack it in with the negativity and let her crack on.

OP you are right to be concerned! Don't listen to any advice to buy cheap worthless insurance policies! The people that buy the dirt cheap policies never look what the coverage actual is and end up on go fund mes when it goes wrong. When I went to Spain in April, the biometric system asked me if I could prove I had £1200 in my account! She runs the risk of immediate deportation if they check and find she's totally skint. £200 won't last long at all. If she finds herself in a situation where her flight home gets cancelled then she will need to personally finance her own extended stay before she can try and claim any expenses back. Nobody should travel skint and she should certainly not go anywhere near moped or quad hire, she can't take any risk whatsoever because she cannot pay any hospital bills. I can't believe 70% of people think you are being unreasonable when she's in a very risky position to go!

No too many people think a £2 policy covers existing conditions or hiring mopeds or quads. No £2 policies have decent cover! I pay £60 to £80 for annual cover and I put the effort into actually looking at what cover I get.

OP Please buy her travel insurance - could you live with yourself if she had an accident and wasn’t covered. Yes, she’s young and a bit daft but we’ve all been 18 before. You learn from your mistakes- but please from not taking out travel insurance. I am fed up reading about people in foreign hospitals being held ransomed or not getting proper treatment cause they thought it would never happen to them, now their begging strangers to give to their go fund me!

She may get deported if the new biometric system asks her to prove she has £1200 I need bank like I got asked when I entered Spain this year. £200 is ridiculous and not going to cover any situations that could arise. It's time people stopped being so irresponsible when they go away! Countries are expecting you to £1200 for a week for a reason.

I don’t think many people mean get a £2 policy.
For a week away at that age, to cover what likely needs covered (including repatriation) is about £10/15 - for real coverage.

The gofundme issue is that too many people do not take insurance.

No, they don’t. It is country dependent. Some will expect more than £1200, some less. You can check on the government site to see what each India country requires you to have access to in your bank or on credit card available balance.

So you are prepared to make her more vulnerable by not helping her out with some extra cash and insurance or last straw by cancelling ? Nah!

It was! Still friends with the girls I went with. We all drank far too much, had boys back, probably behaved a bit too raucously but we are all very sensible, professional, boring parents now.

@BettyJoanPerske

most people who need elderly care get it from the NHS and social care regardless of how good a parent they were.

Due to medical conditions I pay at least £200, but I’d never go without it.

Make sure it covers her for risky sporty activities she might undertake, and tell her insurance won’t pay up if she has an accident while drunk.

Oh really?! Read the 'elderly parents' section here. Lots of entitled old people running their kids ragged.

Oh, that's exactly what OP will do. Just to teach her a lesson.

Why haven’t you helped her from a young age to be more independent with managing her money laundry, cooking etc? She will make mistakes but will learn if you’re not too critical and hard on her. She will then become more confident.

If she is using a card that is free abroad you could give her money on say day 5 if she is running short. Lazing round a pool and some beaches are free. Young ppl predrink
before going out so that doesn't cost as much.18 is the age when most young ppl have their first holiday with friends, as long as they stick together they will hopefully just have a great time.

I remember being on holiday and there was a young couple in their very early twenties or late teens staying in the same hotel. They’d snog all day in the pool. One day they were chatting about dinner that night and I assumed they were talking about where to go, which restaurant to try, but the girl said ‘I got two pot noodles left and a muller corner which we can share’.

Bless em. Cheap shitty holidays are just part of growing up.

More like £20 but as a mum id defo psy for that otherwise coukd have bill for thousands if she gets sick. Not worth it

Make sure she is up to date with her birth control implant, as well as health insurance / eu card.

@BettyJoanPerske

well in that case Op better bung her daughter some spending money to make sure she looks after her in her old age!

@ThisTealLeader
if you’re still reading this, I would get your dd to apply for a global bank card through the banking app. She will be able to access that immediately and you can send money to that for her if needed.

My dd is likewise going away. And very vulnerable. I can’t stop it. And I get why you’re freaking. Your dd’s friends sound sensible. Trust they are there for her.

As for the money thing, I’m not sure this is the right moment. She will learn plenty about herself over there. And resilience. But as an adult, expect her to ask for help, because that is part of adulting.

It's not about money. It's about treating people with respect and kindness. OP seems very carping and critical of her daughter, and that will push her away. Instead of seeing her point of view, she just blames her. I certainly wouldn't be putting myself out in my middle life to care for such a parent. OP should tread very carefully.