Should I dump my boyfriend because he won't stop eating crisps?

[Spicyseniorita7]

I'm in a relatively new relationship (7 months) after over 2 years of being single with some dating disasters along the way. Everything seems great on paper, he is kind, has a good job that pays well, not bad looking, treats me well and never allows me to pay for anything. For context, I am 28F and he is 32M- we both live separately at present. I would like to settle down soon.

I'm unsure if I am self-sabotaging, but some of his eating/snacking habits disgust me, to the point that I think I've developed the ick. This came to light properly on our recent 2 week holiday-prior to this, the longest we had spent together was about 3 days. He eats at least 3 packets of crisps per day and not the sophisticated type i.e kettle chips, think more Skips/monster munch/Nik naks/cheesy wotsits/space raiders. He doesn't wash his hands after eating the crisps and requires prompting to do so. This often results in him having disgusting synthetic crisp dust all over his fingers and fingernails.

Even more disgustingly, after he's finished with a packet, he arches back his head and empties the remnants of the crisp crumbs into his mouth. It's almost as though he cannot bear for a single scrap to be wasted. But the most disgusting is sometimes, after finishing a packet, he will blow up the packet like a balloon and pop it. This has resulted in me being sprayed with crumbs. I've also found scrunched up crisp packets wedged behind his bed, almost as though he can't be bothered to walk to the bin.

We recently went on holiday to Spain and it was mortifying-he didn't try any local food and just wanted to eat British food, McDonald's and crisps. We went to the supermarket and he loaded up the trolley with crisps. I haven't said anything yet, he is keen to start looking for a flat to rent together, but I just can't help but thinking I would prefer a man who doesn't eat over 3 packets of crisps a day and doesn't smell like pickled onion Monster Munch or cheesy wotsits. Is eating all of those crisps a dumpable offence?

What’s wrong with taking a walk? Seems a simple enjoyable thing to do now and then, check out the scenery, people watch, maybe window shop, enjoy the breeze. Not everything has to cost a lot of money.

Again, have you talked to him about this?
If not, YABVU. But it sounds like you don’t like him very much to start with. I think you’re looking for permission from MN to dump
him.

It doesn’t matter if he likes crisps, what matters is that his behaviour is a turn off for you.
If you are finding him annoying now, at the beginning of your relationship, think how annoying it will be in 20 or more years. Bad habits get more annoying not less as you get older.
Dont move in together yet- see if he is amenable to change, perhaps if he stops the messing about with the packets and washes his hands, tries to be more adventurous with food…
If there is no improvement, then you know what to do.

Omg sometimes I just think there's no hope for us

If you are going to take the role of and proactively so of female but not equal then you are going to have to fufill the female half of it, the cooking, cleaning, offspring, childcare and sexual fulfillment of your husband

If he is going to provide financial, physical, hoising and lifelong security if you don't provide the above then he has no reason for you

You must understand this or you are doomed to failure and his family being well off will see to it that his assests and income are hidden leaving you with nothing and him retaining sole custody

To be fair, he can't be a manchild and pick up the bill.

Menchildren don't pick up the tab.
And they are happy for their substitute mummy to do what she likes as long as he's being looked after.

He sounds like a 13 year old child. That would enough to give me the ick. Not eating the crisps but the childish palette and refusal to try local foods.

You should always live/holiday with someone before you settle down. It’s their daily habits that you’ll have to put up with for the rest of your life. On a date, they’re on best behaviour

I haven’t seen anyone blow up a crisp packet and burst it since school.
Is he 8?
Apart from that the lack of basic hygiene would give me the ick.

Yeah I know, right?
I want a man to pay for everything and be rich and be handsome and be charming and be monogamous and do half the childcare and do half the housework and be kind and sensitive and be a no nonsense businessman and love my family and be able to fight off a gang of armed intruders with his bare hands and cry at Titanic.

Lol.

If you expect him to pay for everything then surely he’s going to expect you to do all the cooking, cleaning and eventually childcare.

That’s what usually happens in these ‘traditional’ relationships. How do you feel about that?

There is nothing wrong with paying for your own meal on a date or that date consisting of going for a walk.

Blimey, after your last update you def need to dump him.....so he can find someone who actually lives in 2026 and not 1955. Basically, you are seeking a perfect man, to look after you, pay for you, care for you, but not have any irritating habits and eats crisps of your preference. I would have thought after two years on the date sites you would have realised such man does not really exist. There is a world of difference between a man who pays for everything and your scenario of penny pinching whilst on maternity leave.

You sound very high maintenance. You do realise that woman kind want equality right? How can we achieve that and still expect the old fashioned values to stand as well.

Where do you stand on walkers squares, bloody love those. Now wondering if that is an acceptable crisp 😂 Although nothing will beat picked onion monster munches.

No, sorry, it was an attempt at a joke based on a very similar thread

Bloody hell it’s like the last 70 years didn’t happen.

If you expect a man to pay for everything from day one then you have to bring something to the situation as well.

Throw this one back, he doesn’t deserve to have someone be so disparaging about him. Or is the fact he has money a draw?

Exactly this. I truly despair sometimes.

Of course if someone is going to truly embrace the ‘traditional’ 1950s relationship, that includes a duty to provide sex every time their husband requires a shag.

If he gives you the ick why be with him 🤦‍♀️

I want the man I marry to be able to provide for me and our future family

So the problem with him is that he eats crisps. The problem with you is that you want to live a 1948 lifestyle.

Have you told him you aren't looking for an equal relationship, because you'll be wasting a lot less of each other's time if you tell him that clearly up front.

Oh wait…I read the rest of your comments and you gave me the ick.

Whatever the reason, you don't want to be with him so don't be.

Because I want the man I marry to be able to provide for me and our future family.

C’mon this isn’t about the crisps. Respect and romance absence more like

Yeah it took me a second, but then I got the ick on his behalf 🤣😆

Hold on, isn't scrunching the crispy dregs up and pouring them into your gob a bog-standard part of eating a bag of crisps? I've seen a cabinet minister do that! I can't remember what sort they were though, doubtless very sophisticated ones indeed.

Hahaha Mumsnet is so funny this is exactly how my dad eats crisps let him live and enjoy his poor people crisps. Maybe bring up washing his hands though lol

I have ick on his behalf for you.

Sure hed be happier scarfing down on some pickled onion monster munch than living in the 1950s. He should throw you back.

Tbh I thought you were being ludicrous at first but now Ive finished reading it - it sounds grim! Get your cheesey oniony fingers away from me ! My other half eats pizza etc from buffet on hols but it doesnt stop us going out and doesnt bother me. Sounds like you've got the ick....and once youve got the ick thats it for me !!

I thought so, although I do remember a friend driving along the dual carriageway doing it 🙈