Help end medical misogyny. Sign our petition.

Help end medical misogyny.
Sign our petition.

Sign the petition

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to feel helpless about a large asylum camp in our village?

1001 replies

putupwhatever · 29/06/2026 16:15

My village has been chosen for a 1500 open asylum camp for single men. It will be an open camp (as the men haven't done anything wrong so aren't detained.)

The thing is the village only has 700 people and it is pretty isolated. it's about 10 miles to the nearest city and you can walk to another small village. There is a playpark, a pub and a primary school.

It has to go through planning, but the government have changed the planning laws so that they grant themselves planning and you can't see it as it is deemed sensitive. So they will just grant themselves planning and you can't oppose it without a judicial review--by which time it will probably be already open.

They want to reduce the number of people in hotels. But am AIBU to think that this puts the burden of sorting these issues out on one tiny community? Feels like we are collateral damage to be honest. The community will be outnumbered 2 to 1 and it feels too much. There is nothing for them to do or places to go. Also the fact that it is all single men put in one massive place with no money or means or anything to do is going to lead to problems

Apparently the camps cost £10 less a night than the hotels. But they don't count the set up costs which are astronomical (the one in Essex was £47 million to set up). So it seems like it's not not even cheaper than the problem it is trying to solve but much more expensive.

AIBU to feel a bit helpless? It seems so unfair but there is nothing I can do. We wouldn't be able to move from the village anyway as no one would buy a house here.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
daisybanks · 29/06/2026 23:23

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:16

"the foreign undocumented men from lands which see women as one step below their goats."

This is both racist and xenophobic. I'd say that is what's dangerous here.

Incredible that you know the minds of all asylum seekers and honestly mind boggling that you actually seem to think all asylum seekers are people who would know anything about goats.

They must know about them because they ritually slaughter goats for Eid.

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:24

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Just because I disagree with you does not make me a bot. What a lazy response. How would I know your race. If you're accusing ALL asylum seekers as thinking women are worth trading in goats then yes you are absolutely problematic no matter which term you'd prefer to us.

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:24

daisybanks · 29/06/2026 23:23

They must know about them because they ritually slaughter goats for Eid.

Edited

Again. Not all asylum seekers are the same religion and many are Christians.

Giggorata · 29/06/2026 23:24

nomas · 29/06/2026 23:17

So is it just Muslims you want to deny the right to for a religious wedding and divorce? Or Christians, Jews, Hindus and Sikhs too?

Edited

What I have said isn’t denying people the right to their religious rites.
It is stating that alternative religious legal systems should not be placed on an equal footing with the laws of the land.
So people are not legally married, or divorced, in the UK if they have not undergone a legally recognised ceremony.
Any other religious status does not require a “court” to either confirm or deny.

smallglassbottle · 29/06/2026 23:25

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:16

"the foreign undocumented men from lands which see women as one step below their goats."

This is both racist and xenophobic. I'd say that is what's dangerous here.

Incredible that you know the minds of all asylum seekers and honestly mind boggling that you actually seem to think all asylum seekers are people who would know anything about goats.

You obviously missed the humour? Interesting.

Freud2 · 29/06/2026 23:25

Ionlymakejokestodistractmyself · 29/06/2026 16:54

It's a really tricky one, I can see why you'd be concerned given the numbers. Put them in a village you'll piss fewer people off I guess and maybe that's a location less ripe for exploitation for drugs / gangs / trouble than you may get in a city. Just trying to understand the rationale.

Where we need the investment is in processing applications, so people either can move on, start work and contributing to the economy or can be deported if they don't have a case. Unfortunately many typically end up working in the UK's vast grey / black market or modern day slavery.

The Govt would do well to crack down on that too but in reality it will be unpopular with many to have to pay properly for car wash, nails done, restaurant delivery etc and the other industries where trafficking and slavery are rife.

I don't trust the process of the government deciding who can stay - I think most of the time they're waved through as it's quicker and there's less paperwork. In any case if they've discarded their paperwork (which most do) how on earth can they be accepted. The immigration charities teach them what to say or bent lawyers.

daisybanks · 29/06/2026 23:25

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:24

Again. Not all asylum seekers are the same religion and many are Christians.

How many?

Where are the statistics to show that?

smallglassbottle · 29/06/2026 23:27

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:24

Again. Not all asylum seekers are the same religion and many are Christians.

Real Christians or fake Christians?

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:28

daisybanks · 29/06/2026 23:25

How many?

Where are the statistics to show that?

Have you heard of Google? I'm not your personal search engine. The home office collects data on countries of origin and religion.

lightseeker · 29/06/2026 23:28

SpaceRaccoon · 29/06/2026 23:21

So no comment about the fake letters then? No concern that it's largely the men who get to escape, and not the women whose lives are far, far worse under the Taliban?

Ffs! The women can't leave can they? Many will have children. It's common practice that a family will send one person initially - yes, invariably a healthy male who has more chance of surviving the journey - and they all hope for the best. They hope he'll get asylum so that they may follow.

So what if there are some fake letters? The fact is millions are living in terror. I'd buy a fake letter or whatever if that's what it takes? Wouldn't you?

Tauranga · 29/06/2026 23:28

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:21

The system of asylum is male centric because that's how we've created it. And people are too busy arguing amongst themselves instead of calling for a proper, more functional overhaul of the system that would empower more women and children to seek asylum here. As it stands, women and children are utterly dependent on men successfully claiming asylum in order to create safe passage.

Or is it only white women you care about? UK women? What about all the other women suffering globally or do you not give a hoot about them?

I called it a tragedy because there should have been appropriate risk assessments, safeguarding procedures in place since this was a killing that happened to a woman at work. Onus should be on the workplace to ensure women or anyone for that matter working with ANY vulnerable individual is safe while doing so.

You are a lunatic

Not wanting to pay for the entire world to turn up on our doorstep and then expect us to pay is not related at all to if we care how women are treated in other countries.

We work longer now, we pay billions of over seas aid, now we pay billions to feed house clothe and all the rest in our own villages.

Stop obfuscation

EasternStandard · 29/06/2026 23:29

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:21

The system of asylum is male centric because that's how we've created it. And people are too busy arguing amongst themselves instead of calling for a proper, more functional overhaul of the system that would empower more women and children to seek asylum here. As it stands, women and children are utterly dependent on men successfully claiming asylum in order to create safe passage.

Or is it only white women you care about? UK women? What about all the other women suffering globally or do you not give a hoot about them?

I called it a tragedy because there should have been appropriate risk assessments, safeguarding procedures in place since this was a killing that happened to a woman at work. Onus should be on the workplace to ensure women or anyone for that matter working with ANY vulnerable individual is safe while doing so.

Yes it’s a terrible system.

I don’t think Rhiannon losing her life in that way makes the system worth it. Plus other victims.

IsEveryUserNameBloodyTaken · 29/06/2026 23:29

SpaceRaccoon · 29/06/2026 22:19

Whoever gets in after Labour, likely reform, will leave the ECHR. That's going to change the landscape dramatically.

Quite honestly with all that is going on I welcome it.

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:29

smallglassbottle · 29/06/2026 23:27

Real Christians or fake Christians?

Do you go to your local church to determine that?

Why does it matter if they aren't coming here based on religious persecution? What has that got to do with you?

daisybanks · 29/06/2026 23:29

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:28

Have you heard of Google? I'm not your personal search engine. The home office collects data on countries of origin and religion.

So I'll ask again.
What percentage of asylum seekers are Christian? - if you don't know just say so.
Don't spout information you can't prove.

ISnoggedYourMum · 29/06/2026 23:29

The refugee convention was created to handle European post ww2 displacement

SpaceRaccoon · 29/06/2026 23:30

lightseeker · 29/06/2026 23:28

Ffs! The women can't leave can they? Many will have children. It's common practice that a family will send one person initially - yes, invariably a healthy male who has more chance of surviving the journey - and they all hope for the best. They hope he'll get asylum so that they may follow.

So what if there are some fake letters? The fact is millions are living in terror. I'd buy a fake letter or whatever if that's what it takes? Wouldn't you?

If you are buying a fake letter from the Taliban, you're not at risk from the Taliban. They're at best economic migrants, at worst welfare seekers.

Sure, most of us would try our luck if we were born somewhere shit, but so what?

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:30

IsEveryUserNameBloodyTaken · 29/06/2026 23:29

Quite honestly with all that is going on I welcome it.

That is an incredibly short sighted view. Especially since reforms policies are extremely anti- women.

smallglassbottle · 29/06/2026 23:30

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:29

Do you go to your local church to determine that?

Why does it matter if they aren't coming here based on religious persecution? What has that got to do with you?

Because I'm a tax payer and I'm paying for them?

daisybanks · 29/06/2026 23:33

smallglassbottle · 29/06/2026 23:27

Real Christians or fake Christians?

Lots of Christian "converts " being baptised in bathtubs...

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2025/10/20/asylum-seekers-baptised-in-migrant-hotel-bathtubs/

IsEveryUserNameBloodyTaken · 29/06/2026 23:34

SkaterGrrrrl · 29/06/2026 22:21

Are you for real? Read a history book.

"British imperialism and exploitation in Sudan dates back to the mid-1800s, intensified into 56 years of colonial rule and led to civil war and the deaths of hundreds of thousands, as tensions created by British imposition of arbitrary borders drove a legacy of exploitation and conflict that left Sudan impoverished and war-torn."

https://www.stopwar.org.uk/article/britains-bloody-hands-sudans-ongoing-nightmare/ www.stopwar.org.uk/article/britains-bloody-hands-sudans-ongoing-nightmare/]]]]

They are here because we were there.

”We” were not there though.
Look to the rich families in this country who made much money out of them.
Let them pay to equal what they have taken out, not make the rest of the country suffer.

Tauranga · 29/06/2026 23:34

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:30

That is an incredibly short sighted view. Especially since reforms policies are extremely anti- women.

You are relentless.

Reform are anti women, however afghani men should be welcomed and we should start a knitting club woth them.

Reform will remove all of these poor misunderstood men and that is so nasty of them.

We must stop being racist and buckle down to work until we are 80 so Jamil can get free accommodation and education. Then his wife can come over and have 12 kids and get our houses and we can go and live in a tent.

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 23:34

smallglassbottle · 29/06/2026 23:30

Because I'm a tax payer and I'm paying for them?

So they owe you personal information now?

I benefit from your taxes as a single mother even though i also work full time and pay taxes, how much of my personal information do you think you are now entitled to? What about pensioners? The disabled? You want their deets too?

smallglassbottle · 29/06/2026 23:34

daisybanks · 29/06/2026 23:33

And the stupid fools who are baptising them.

TheTikiTurnip · 29/06/2026 23:35

Lavender14 · 29/06/2026 16:24

"The community will be outnumbered 2 to 1 "

This is a really unhelpful way to look at it and it kind of speaks to an 'us and them' mentality op. That part I would say really isn't a fair thing and is your exposure to stereotypes speaking. I've worked extensively with single asylum seeking males and ALL of them bar none have been nothing but respectful individuals who were really keen to learn English, learn our culture, build a home and a life for themselves so they could get female or elderly relatives to safety. Most of them were strongly opposed to any sort of extremism which is what they were often running from. I have never ever felt unsafe working with them in the way I have with some local men.

Aside from that I think you are right to be concerned about the impact on community infrastructure which is a totally separate issue. I'd be asking council for their plans around access to healthcare and services that promote health, wellbeing and inclusion.

What I would also say is that for a small village this will likely bring a lot of money to your local shops, volunteers for local charity groups and probably new visitors to your local churches. So your community, if they approach this right, will have the benefit of people with free time and skills/ abilities to lend which is
in real decline in the current climate.

@Lavender14 In what capacity have you worked with male asylum seekers?

Im not sure that them wanting to visit local churches, help out in charity shops, and integrate with the community is everyone's experience.

There are 4 asylum hotels in my town, and knife crime and rape here is the highest its ever been.

Several years ago, an adult male asylum seeker was enrolled and attended my daughters school for a few months, as the authorities had not done the correct checks. He later went on to knife someone in the town centre, and killed them.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.
Swipe left for the next trending thread