To wonder when people got so selfish

[DoubleEspressoForMe]

Over the last few days with my windows open all the time, I've really realised how little people care about how much they impact on other people. I am a dog owner, but I have been hearing a dog bark for well over an hour somewhere nearby. Its not that late in the morning. I'd be mortified if my dogs were disturbing others at any time of the day, let alone a Saturday morning. Not only that, the dog is clearly unhappy!

Things like this, or making noise in gardens late at night when everyone clearly has their own windows open. Or smoking weed all day so everyone else can smell it. Or having kids screaming at 7am in the garden on a weekend.

I was always raised to be conscious of other people, but a lot of people seem to be totally unaware or uncaring of their impact on others around them.

Our next door neighbour watches Friends ALL DAY with the patio doors open. Just hearing the theme tune now makes the hairs on my neck rise.

I suspect we all have impact on our neighbours, including you, but when it's ourselves we don't notice because we're "just doing things".

In my opinion things have got worse since covid

People have definitely got more selfish and self centred. It’s all about “my rights” but never my responsibilities!!!

I think folk have also got much less tolerant of others. People using their gardens in nice weather shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone and people make noise, have barbecues, listen to music and god forbid occasionally have parties.

I am so going to steal this!

Lockdown turned everyone selfish and then when it ended it just never went away. So many entitled arseholes about

@MargaretThursday I suspect you are right. But equally I think there is a degree of difference. Chatting in your garden is different to screaming with laughter on a week night until 1am. I do think there is a difference.

@Jellycatspyjamas hmm I appreciate people have a right to do these things. But I think you can do them in a way that is mindful of your neighbours. There is a fine line between what is reasonable and what is overly intrusive and impactful on others.

Like you, OP. I was raised to be considerate towards other people, in really simple basic ways, and I really notice these days that most people just don’t have that mentality anymore.

Covid and lockdown certainly gave a lot of people a “why should I” mentality. The rapid arrival of social media gave people a “main character” syndrome in life too. I’m sure there must be other reasons. It’s sad though.

I think it was Covid, people seem to have forgotten how to live with other people around.

Or they were always selfish and I just did not notice.

Social media and the rise of individualism accelerated it and then COVID happened and it all went off the rails because a lot of people were far more concerned with being inconvenienced and hated 'being told what to do' so went out of their way to be assholes and assert their 'rights'.

So then they've decided their 'rights' trump everyone else's and there is no longer antisocial behaviour, just moaning Karens who don't like it.

My dog chasing your dog, child or you? Well my dog is my family and dogs chase. Get over it.

My child screaming or running around in a restaurant, pub, wedding. Kids do kids stuff, they've got the right to be here get over it.

Listening to music, watching TV or having loud telephone conversations in public? get noise cancelling headphones if you don't like it, get over it.

Noisy neighbours playing loud music, kids screaming, parties etc. Don't like it? Move.

Expecting a thank you? I didn't ask you to help me or do X so why would I say thanks?

Okay I did ask you to help me or do that thing for me but you agreed to so you shouldn't expect me to say thanks. Don't do it if you expect me to be grateful.

Yeah you lent money but you obviously had it spare so you shouldn't expect me to pay it back when you don't need it.

And so on.

This!! Social media has made people self obsessed!!! People constantly demand attention nowadays.

I’m not sure we are more selfish but as pp said less tolerant

The selfishness has become a lot more noisier!!!

I think this is spot on!

As family circles have been come smaller so have community networks and people's tolerance of others. 20 years ago I'd be fighting with others for voluntary work now I'm on the other foot trying to source people to help volunteer and it's like a desert. People have the 'I'm alright jack' mentally. Unless it benefits them then they just aren't interested in other people. You also see it on the roads now, the absolute entitlement of people who put others at risk due to their lack of consideration or care.

I'm late 30's and find this lack of care, community and tolerance of others incredibly sad. No wonder we have generations coming through now who are depressed. Even at my age I remember us all playing out, neighbours would say hi and squirt us with hosepipes when they were watering their plants. Nobody would be moaning about the noise knowing that we would all be in from 8pm.

Whenever I see a solid front door (with no windows), especially with a postbox on the front gate, or an electric gate, on a butchered 1930's house I know what kind of selfish arsehole BMW driver lives there.

What an odd assumption.

I was thinking of that!

Covid has made people’s bad streaks more or think it’s ok to be rude, selfish, impatient etc. Which has no positive effect

Meaning they have cut themselves off from "community" and have no wish to engage with any neighbours - who they probably look down on.

Social media like Instagram has made people become incredibly selfish towards the environment, by visiting and photographing once-hidden gems and famous landmarks. These are being "ruined" by over-tourism, environmental damage, and crowds seeking the perfect, staged photo.

I think it’s actually both.

Yes. I think the turning point was when whilst we were being told to Stay home Save lives they were all partying in number 10.

I agree with you OP.
Not sure what it is but feels like people have a combination of entitlement and ego centricity. Not sure its due to the pandemic, but things have shifted.

Some dog owners just stop hearing their dog bark, not sure how they do that, and not making excuses, but they just grow immune to it, or say "Oh Brutus has always been a bit of a barker. And forget to disipline their pet. Having to listen to that bark is awful though. Vaping and smoking, whether that be cigarettes or pot, that is in my opinion selfish.