Do we need another rule to protect ourselves from rape?

[wellindeed]

These recent cases of a husband drugging their wife so other men can rape her are new level horrific to me.

We have always known that the vast majority of violence and sexual violence against women and girls happens at home by men. Normally, someone they know who often has some level of control and the women have, at some stage, thought they could trust.

We all know the rules of being female.

Women always take extra precautions from men every single time they leave the house, whether that is changing a walking route, getting a cab rather than walking or holding keys between our fingers. We know the rules of being female.

Women know not to leave their drink unattended or ask for Angela at the bar.

We know that sometimes when a partner is showing escalating controlling signs and is violent towards us at home, that it is better to not challenge this behaviour and plan the escape when he’s not around to avoid an increased risk of murder.

Women know that if a man follows us and is heckling at us, not to say anything because the man may become violent. Or as I taught my daughters go into the nearest shop and ask for help.

There are more examples of how we, as women, know the rules to attempt to protect ourselves from male violence.

Should we add another rule to being female?

If we feel sleepy, groggy unexpectedly or if we are having unexplained gyno medical issues should the rule be set up a camera to check our husband hasn’t been drugging us and getting random men in to rape us unconscious?

I mean what is wrong with men as a sex class.

Whatever rules are in place are clearly not working and the VAWG strategy set out by the government is just lip service.

It's not just at home women and girls face violence or harassment working on public transport,I had to call BTP a few weeks ago had just got to to a station on the south coast.

Was going to staff room for my break,a group of men around 35 to 40 shouting obscenities at a young lady and shouting vile things because of what she was wearing.

She was so frightened she asked if she could get on the train normally we can't let people on unless there is a member of staff onboard so I let her on and took my break in the cab.

Other incidents have included a man harassing a woman trying to get a phone number.and a man sitting near a group of schoolgirls when the rest of the train was empty.

So whatever is in place at the moment definitely isn't working,after Sarah everard I thought things might get better for women and girls if anything I think it's getting worse.

It’s shocking a sad that we have to live like this because the danger men pose to us.

I just want to walk alone a night in my own thoughts and not be on high alert

I'm not sure what your point is, is someone suggesting people do this? If so i think that's ridiculous. This isn't a thing. It's a one off horrific case that left most people dumbfounded. There's no point in putting time or energy or money trying to eliminate the risk of something that is so unlikely to happen. There are probably 1000s of similarly unlikely scenarios that people don't try to mitigate in their normal lives.

It’s not a one off now sadly though @Dontlletmedownbruce - more & more are coming out since Gisele Pelicot & these ones are in the UK! It’s horrific!

It's not a one off. This isn't the Gisele Pelicot case.
There was also the poor incapacitated women raped by multiple strangers in a hotel room.
These are only the cases we know about.
The point is all of these men who participated in raping unconscious women are your neighbours/fathers/friends.
They're your average bloke from all across society. One was a paramedic. That is the problem. Women aren't even safe in hospital or their own beds.
We have a violence against women epidemic.

If it was a one off there wouldn’t be hundreds of men in any given local area signed up to a website specifically to do this to women. Those blokes within driving distance of Gisele Pelicot aren’t the only ones on there. They wouldn’t be going on such sites if there were no victims being pimped on them by their partners/husbands. The sites wouldn’t exist for just one person.

Sadly not a one off case. 62 million visitors to a website teaching men to do this. I don't agree with the premise of the OP though as a rule, it's not illegal to set up a camera in your own house if you have worries already.

No amount of rules will help.
No matter what you try to make a rule about, there will be some new situation you didn't think needed a rule to cover it cropping up.

Did you see the news story about the 19 year old Afghani guy in France who raped 5 goats and a lamb, killing one in the process?
He said he is a normal guy, it was no big deal for him to do that and if he hadn't he would have needed to rape a woman.
He only got 30 months.

Who would expect we need a rule that we need to watch out if there aren't enough young animals to be raped as a male might feel he is entitled to a womans body if an animals isn't available?

that is horrific!

urgh

I suppose you proved my point because it isn’t a one off.

Let’s take a moment to remember the monitor lizard who was raped to death by four men.

It’s not just humans. Every living creature is at risk.

What the fuck is wrong with them? Is it hormonal imbalance? Some kind of mental illness, that views their own urges as more important than anything or anyone else?

We need to look at the statistics on sex crimes, see whether we can identify trends. Bloody hard given how few are prosecuted, but still,

And frankly, I’d be damn suspicious of a man bringing me a drink I hadn’t asked for, now.

I said exactly the same after watching the news earlier- what is wrong with men?

If one of my friends suggested getting their husband drunk/drugged so we could abuse him I would be absolutely appalled and go straight to the Police. That these gross men willing to do it manage to find each other is terrifying. That they are willing to suggest it to other men with the confidence that it won't get reported or stopped is terrifying.

With every depressing incident coming to light I find it increasingly worrying for my daughter. How can we keep women and girls safe?

Starting to wonder if there's something fucked up on the y chromosome.

And I am sick to death of all the namalt bullshit.

We need to talk about the risks we face from men as a sex without having to reassure men we dont mean all of them or listen to some woman bleat on about how her nigel isnt like this so we're being unfair to men.

@wellindeedapologies I thought we were talking about the French case. Yes it's terrifying that this is more widespread than I thought

There have been several uk cases in court since Gisele Pelicot’s. Most distressing to realise there’s been an epidemic of this behaviour passing unnoticed.

https://edition.cnn.com/interactive/2026/03/world/expose-rape-assault-online-vis-intl/index.html

It's not quite one off. It appears to be the tip of an iceberg. Rapists have found a way to contact each other and meet to rape women.

I hope women who have been abused, their families and friends and GP's will start putting two and two together.

I think we need to seriously consider Penis Licences. Like for firearms. Chemical castration until you've proven you can be trusted to have a functioning dick.

I am being facetious, but there's a grain of truth in it.

I don't actually think you are far off from reality OP - if you find yourself with sy,proms that don't make sense then you can get a hidden camera and ensure you are not going mad. But honestly, what sort of way is that to live in your own home

This exactly.

What is it that differs between men and women that the pack mentality takes over to make it acceptable somehow to do these horrific actions?

Got an even better rule - or an idea rather than a rule. Let’s set up Crone Island as somewhere akin to the old Nunneries, self sufficient refuges for women to live their entire lives in without men. Places with land, women working those resources to provide livings, and the rest of the time practicing self defence and collective defence.

Men have always needed us more than we need them, that’s why they hate us and why the patriarchy exists.

It’s incredibly rare - the vast majority of men are good. As sad as these cases are, font blow it out of proportion. I’ve always walked alone at night with no issue too. Be careful but be proportionate