AIBU to think my neighbour’s cat care problem is not mine?

[Thepartwhereidrun]

My neighbour stopped my son on his way out last night to ask if he would look after her cat when she is away from tomorrow for 2 weeks, going in twice a day. He said sorry but he couldn’t.

I didn’t know she had spoken to him until she knocked our door and told us. Her cat sitter has let her down last minute and now she won’t be able to go on holiday unless she can find someone else. Nightmare for her, but her cat sitter is ill so it can’t be helped. I said I can’t help her but I text our dog sitter, who also does cat sitting to ask if she had availability and said I’d get back to her if she could do it.

She asked if I would also ask my son again, which I did when he got home, but he doesn’t want to do it. He has just finished his A levels and wants to be free to come and go as he pleases which is understandable. I said that if he has said no then that means he can’t.

Our dog sitter text me back to say she didn’t have any availability for the first week but could do the second week. I text my neighbour to let her know and to give her sitters contact details. She has just text back ‘no good, what am I meant to do for the first week?’

I haven’t replied as although I get she is probably feeling desperate, how the fuck is her cat my problem?

Tbh that would make me even less likely to help.

she could be ringing round catteries or pet sitters rather than sat hoping you’ll pressure your son into doing it for a ridiculously low amount.

OP just shut the conversation down. My DS is not available. You will have to cancel your holiday or phone around for pet sitters and catteries in the area.

She is pushy and you are 100% correct - this is entirely her problem. So rude of her to try and make it yours and using emotional manipulation to do so

Not when you’re not there to look after them they’re not. OPs son is going away soon. OP will be away for part of the time for work.

It also ties you as you have to be there morning and afternoon/evening so you’re constantly clock watching. I’ve done it for neighbours but it’s a bind, you can’t have a lie in, if you want to be out into the evening you have to come home, you can’t work late etc.

You're not going to be around anyway so she needs to accept no as an answer. Applying pressure would piss me off and ensure I never helped her.

She is a cheeky bastard. You have said you can’t help and tried to find an alternative. In return, she sent you a rude text and now another one to try to guilt trip you. Fuck her.

OP just say no. No idea why she can’t board it in a Cat boarding place FFs

Surely she has other friends with children. I have offered dds friends 10 a day in the past. They just have to come in once a day, add food. Noone has ever turned it down. It's 200 pounds for three weeks!

Ok you don't want to do it that's fine. I do think though where would we be if we all said no to each other and never yes.

Have read OP's posts but not TFT - who will look after the OP's dogs when everyone is away at the same time? Are they going to kennels? I can see why the neighbour might think someone will be around to feed her cat if there are pets next door.

Doesn't she have any other neighbours or friends? Or can't she post on Facebook or Nextdoor or similar? Not that it is OP's problem to solve, but just find some people to be so lacking in resourcefulness.

If neither of you are available, I'm not sure what she expects you to do?!
Also, bloody cheeky only offering £30 for 2 weeks. I'm sure she would have been paying her cat sitter a lot more than that. For last minute emergency care, she should be offering to pay MORE than what the cat sitter charged.

Presumably OP has that sorted and isn’t applying pressure to neighbours to look after them.

Just seen she offered your son £30 OP, fucking hell. Stingy bastard.

Those saying she should use a cattery. There are very few around and get booked months in advance. The neighbour had booked a cat sitter.
Perhaps she could look on cat in a flat or other sites.

However I would have done it between you.
If she had an automatic feeder it would only be once a day.
I pay a cat sitter £7 a day. She goes in once, puts food down and sets up the automatic feeder for the evening. It takes her ten minutes.

She needs to be actively problem solving. Must be other people nearby with teens. Post on facebook. Ring catteries. She's annoying.

They get fully booked months ahead. She had made arrangements with a cat sitter who has let her down.

What happened to helping neighbours.

Then you say no next time.

I’ve been in the situation where my dog sitter let us down last minute, it’s really difficult. Luckily, that very day, a neighbour posted about her new venture in dog sitting and I was able to sort it. I don’t know what I would have done without it.

Nobody is beholden to any neighbour, OP’s son can choose whatever he likes. If I were in her shoes, I’d be suggesting that doing it for a couple of weeks won’t kill him, he’ll earn some money, and has the rest of the summer to muck about with his friends. If there is a day or two where he can’t manage, I’d pop in and do it for him.

Can't you reply no he can't because he doesn’t want to cancel his own holiday!

How can they do it between them if they end up being away at the same time? OPs son should be able to go away when it suits him, not have to plan it around random neighbour.

He is waiting for the weather to get cooler. My daughter and her friends are also waiting for the weather to cool before going camping. At the moment when I ask it’s “maybe Saturday, or Sunday, or Monday”. The joys of finishing A levels and being young and free!

That sounds so annoying! I think you can’t ignore her message unfortunately, as so long as she’s not heard back she obviously still assuming he will do it. ‘Hi neighbour, I’ve spoken to son, and as I suspected he has lots of post-a-level plans and definitely wont be about. Hope you find someone’ then you mute her messages!

Perhaps the neighbour should offer to cancel her own holiday so she can be around to feed OPs dogs next week when she's away with work.

Just feed the cat and be a good neighbour ffs.

She will not be there ffs

Fascinating insight into how some people think other people should simply do as they say and rearrange their life to suit them.

Honestly, I would have said no (obviously, neither of you are there) and wouldn’t have given it another thought.

You could always try a bit of a compromise and say you/your son can do once a day in the morning - if the cat has a cat flap there’s no need to go in twice a day and there are these feeding machines you can buy that have timers on she could look at that as well but it seems as if she’s just panicking and not thinking through options that make it easier for everyone. And £30 for the whole 2 weeks is mental lol that’s pittance lol. But maybe say look if you get these cat feeders my son or me can pop by in the mornings? Kindness isn’t around much in this world anymore so we need to try and be when we can (but of course not to the detriment of ourselve or to appease super CF neighbours lol)

agree… tenner a day for cat sitting is standard round us. She’s taking the puss.🐈‍⬛

She’d be a terrible employee if she did that being as she is away with work. 😂 Will her neighbour pay her bills when she has no job?

This thread is mad!